YouSaid · the spoken record

Janet Mock

lines on the record: 53
first: 2018-02-07
most recent: 2018-02-07
sittings or episodes: 1
sources: podcast

Every line below is reproduced as it was said and linked to the record it came from. Nothing here is summarised or generated. Directory · Search · Corrections

“Is everything Is love and truth. And I think for me Spiritual quest. To figure out how to find God in me, which is love and truth, and then how to give people space. Figure out the godliness in themselves”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“And he brought everyone to stand a witness to that, we're going to accept Janet as Janet. This is Janet. This is my baby. And that's something”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“I would say that me and my father, we don't really know each other. I think that we can appreciate the experiences that we went through together”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“I would say You feel is real Keep going. People will call you by the name you choose. People will respect you, and you will be validated, affirmed, and heard”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“She came to liberate. That's what I want people to say. She came to liberate Yeah, she came to liberate. I don't know why that keeps on coming in my head, but I think so much about the work that Harriet Tubman Seems so bizarre, but that's what I come to. It's like, what does it take for a person to go get their own freedom? And then to come back. And show people the way.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“Can I hug you? He understood how big of a deal it was for me to do that, to trust him. And so I always think about Their eyes were watching God from Zora nor Herson. I think about. Janie sitting there. Washing her feet, eating her friend Phoebe's food, and telling Phoebe, girl, let me tell you what I went through. And that's what I had with Aaron. I was like, let me tell you what I went through. And so I feel that in this relationship. I've been given Keys. my own promised land. You know, meeting this person who just sat and listened and affirmed me every step of the way, who believed in my vision.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“What's so interesting about that moment is that all my fears was exactly how you framed it. It was about him rejecting me. As soon as I sat there, I realized, as I sat there and I opened up to him, I was opening up to myself. So it wasn't so much about the rejection point at that point because I had already come and I was like, you know what? I'm just going to accept it as what it is. And what I needed to do was tell myself the story. And that's what I did in his bedroom that night. That was the gift because I had never, at that point I was 26. I had never told myself my own story. That's how much the shame and the silence was internalized within me. I was going through the motions. I was doing all the things that people said was brave and courageous. But I had never really sat and reflected on all of the stuff.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“Oh yeah. Really wanted to know me, and that was bizarre for me because I could all often rest on pretty and kind of, you know, keep men at a distance. I had that down. I knew how to thrive and have fun in a three-month relationship. And then to end it because I didn't want anyone to know me, end it, not really go to the point of intimacy and then... But he was not having that.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“At that time I wasn't, I didn't really I didn't really love myself yet. I had gone through all the emotions to become myself. I hadn't yet told myself my own story as soon as something would happen I would put it into a compartment and move on”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“I think we are. Talked about sexuality for so long, and now I think it's time to have a conversation around gender. What does it mean to exist on this spectrum?”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“You can tell someone is trans. Then it becomes a debate, then it becomes about, so did you go all the way? Did you do this? What did happen? Yes. Oh, wow. What did your family think? What was this like? And so the person spending most of their time not being seen as a person, but being gawked at. And so, I think that most people, most trans people are often rebutted.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“Because I can pass in the world, most people are not rebutting me when I walk around. They accept me As a woman. So it offers me safety. It offers me access. It offers me a level of comfort.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“Oftentimes, when I sit down, I often only talk about one part of my identity, which is my transness. through so much I'm a woman, but I'm a trans woman. You know, and most people, when I walk around in the world, they don't see that visible difference. They don't see that. All they say is, oh, who's that black girl with the big curly hair? That's what they may see.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“It was I was 18 years old and I made so many sacrifices and compromises. And I got my girl. I went out in the world and I got her, and I liberated her, and I went through a whole underground railroad of resources to get to that space where I could stand in that mirror for the first time naked and lay bare in my truth. This is who I am. And I did that on my own And so to have that at 18, that gift, nothing could stop me after that. That's what I felt at least.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“A lot of the Frustration, I would say, from trans community and from a lot of allies to the trans community was that why are we still having this conversation about what's in our pants?”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“I think that because a conversation was promoted in such a way, it became the blueprint for how we tell trans people's stories. And I think a lot of”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“So that's a basic story. Now, there are some people who exist in that middle part of the spectrum that we don't even talk about often. It's a lot more complicated. And there's people who look like me, who have different body parts, who then would just, everyone's minds become a bit more, they're like, wait, that's not what I thought. I thought you wanted to go all the way. I thought you wanted to have the surgery. I thought you wanted to do this. And it's like, no, I'm fine. I'm fine being a woman who has a penis. People then get confused. And so that's where the combination”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“My journey is so basic in a sense. I went from being this little boy child who transitioned as a teenager doing puberty. And I became a little girl, right? A teenager, a young woman. And I fit perfectly into what people's idea of what a woman is supposed to look like.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“Who I am now. So I sit here and I tell people I'm Janet Mock, you know, yes, I was born my parents' firstborn son. That is the truth. That's the truth of our experiences that probably was the root of a lot of my conflict growing up and the dissonance that I felt and my journey and identity. But we worked through that. Grandma got it, and she was 70 something years old. She embraced me. She got over it. And we moved on But the world has not moved on from that part of my story.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“I think it triggers that no one will ever see me as I am now. They will always qualify it with the way in which my past was And so, my past becomes more important.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“When trans people say get upset around the narratives that we tell around trans people's bodies and lives, like you were once this and now you're this and so stay tuned until the next commercial break when we talk about how she transformed and then went to Bangkok and had this surgery and now she's a woman and we'll accept her that way. That's always the way in which we tell trans stories lodged. When someone is going through that process and they're still in that and they see that in media, it becomes triggering to I think a lot of people”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“Yes, I can forgive that. I can on a personal level, but I think that because so much of who I am is representative of entire community of people. It becomes a bigger debate than I would take it for myself on a personal level.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“So I think this is more of a conversation around what becomes fat is what the truth that I felt as a child fact or is it what society says is fact”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“Was a baby Assigned a sex at birth based on the appearance of my genitals. Because of the appearance of my genitals, I was told that I needed to love a woman and I needed to be masculine. As I gained agency in my life. Decided to Say that I know myself to be a girl, despite what you think you know about me.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“Right, and that's the way that they would define it. But I think that the most dramatic stories we tend to tell are coming from. This space that was completely opposite than where it's at, where some people may just kind of be right here, and that's where they may hover for a while. And that's where they exist.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“That wrong to say that? No. Because some people that maybe their journey, they may have lived their lives and been perceived as men in the world and transitioned into womanhood.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“operation yet Oh, see, and so that's where I think it becomes a little bit more complicated. I think all the way for some people, right? And I think that's why I ask, what do you mean by all the way? Because some people don't even, some trans women are trans people don't even want to have any kind of surgeries. They're fine with how their bodies are.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“To see me And to see me at 12 years old, I was given the gift of having a best friend. Who saw That was pivotal in my life at a time where. Everyone else was rebut She”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“Oh, she did call me out. Yeah. And that was my first interaction with her. Are you Mahu? That's what she asked me. And Mahu is a term within Hawaiian culture, kind of loosely translated to transgender. And I just clinched up. I was like, wait, someone to see me, someone is calling me out for who I am. And I wasn't ready to face that. And it took a few months, and I saw her, and she asked me kindly the next time she goes, Do you want to play volleyball after school? And that was the start of our friendship. And Wendy was the first person to... Tweez my eyebrows, which was my first active intimacy as a young person, having someone to finally take care of me. And I was like, wow, this is what friendship is.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“There's no way to miss Wendy. Who came into my life at 12 years old, who told me to stop lying. She would wear these super short shorts with socks pulled all the way up. She'd prance around school. So, I always saw her and I was afraid of her.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“I think it's twofold. I think somewhere within myself the way that I was raised from my father and all his dysfunction and his flaws. He was very selfishly himself. He didn't care about what his girlfriends thought, about what his mother thought, about what his sisters thought, about what his children thought of him. He was fully himself, flaws and all. I think I learned that a lot from him, but I think the other layer was I did it in community, you know, going to Hawaii, growing up in this culture where there was a vast spectrum of gender expressions and identities.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“I marvel at it now. At that time it seemed like the only possibility, the only pathway. All I had, you know, growing up, I grew up poor, I grew up as a black child in communities that are already suffering. And so the only resource I had was my truth, was myself. That's the one thing I could control in the world, is to present and be who I knew I was. And I knew that living authentically and being myself would be the first step towards any kind of success.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“Come back after ninth grade, and I was like, I'm not going to present in a way that makes anyone else comfortable. I'm going to present in a way that makes me comfortable. And so I had just been elected class treasurer. And so I stand on that stage the first day of school, our sophomore class, and I say, hello everyone, I'm Janet.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“Yeah, and I think that my whole purpose with writing the book, it was to show that they were flawed, that they were people who had pains and dreams that had failed them. And I had to hold them accountable to what they did to me when they were trying to do right, when they thought that they were doing the best thing for their child.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“This hideous hibiscus covered dress That dress made me feel like I was presenting for the first time as who I knew myself to be. And what I think is so interesting for any child that is just trying to express who they are, figure out what that is, it was stamped out of me. And I think that all of us get these cues. All young people get these cues that who we know ourselves to be should be hidden. So you put that away, you put that in a compartment, and you do it at another time. You do it when you can leave the home. You don't do it within my house.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“I go to her and she smacks me on my butt and makes me go and sit basically quietly until my mom comes. And then I get a lecture from my mom around gender performance, around I said, I got in trouble for stealing a dress. She goes, no, you got in trouble for putting on a dress.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“So that was playing Truth or Dare with one of my closest girlfriends at the time. We're both six years old. We're laying underneath the clotheslines in her grandmother's garden. And she goes, I dare you to put on my grandmother's dress, the Muumu, drape it on and run across the parking lot and tap the garbage can and run back. So I put it on. I didn't really think anything was wrong with doing that. You know, I'm five, six years old. And then my sister Corey here cackling. I was like, oh, I want to get in trouble. And so then I run back quickly and my grandmother said, get your butt over here.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“I started compromising. When they weren't around, I would express myself. When they were around I would sit quietly and just do my homework”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“Yep, girls do that. Boys are not secretaries. No. Boys are not secretaries. Boys are football players. They're Dallas Cowboys. That's what they do.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“And so everyone basically gets on board that the way that we need to do what we need to all do is to fix this. How do we get this out of this child? And so my father started lecturing me. It was my first lecture from my father about the way I should act in the world, the way that I should be voiced.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“Its secretary because to me, from what I learned in culture, that's what women did. Women were, you know, they assisted men in their dreams. And then I went home with a note to my father from my teacher, and I thought it was going to praise me. And instead, it would be basically like, I think this is something you should be paying more attention to. And that just triggered my father on so many levels, his own insecurity is about.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“My father was the most vocal for sure, especially when I would have I would do things that was against his definition of how it was supposed to be So when I was in the second grade, and we were told, what do you want to be when you grow up?”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“Because I did what a boy was supposed to do. I did what he wanted me to do. But that had nothing to do with me. That was the thing that I even knew even back then. It had to do with the performance that he had to make with his friends to show that his son was not the sissy. Was not this sissy boy child?”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“She's basically like a rough house version of football. My brother was playing it first. And my father saw me on the sidelines with my cousin Michelle cheering. And he didn't like that. Didn't want me to be their cheerleader, he wanted me to be the player. He was determined to butch me up, as we would say So he'd walked over to me where I was on the sideline watching my brother play. He grabbed me up from my shirt and he said, get in the game. I got in the game with my brother Chad, my brother Chad was like, just if you get the ball, just run as fast as you can. I got the ball. I ran and right before I got to the finish line, the goal post. I was slammed down. Dirt went into my mouth. And I was hurt, but I never saw my father prouder of me.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“I held my wrist, why I had a little swish in my hips. I had no idea why I was performing self in this way, why I was expressing my gender in this way. I didn't have language to understand that. I don't think my father did either. All he knew was that that's not how a boy is supposed to act. Not my”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“Oh They all have their stories now. Yeah. Right? My mom talks about the first time when I Put her earring backing in my ear and it fell down, and I had to go into the The surgeons and get it suctioned out. My father talks about the times in which he would watch me with a side eye, skeptical, wondering why I moved the way I did around the world, around our little community.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“And something internal inside of me told me constantly. What they're saying is wrong And so it creates this dissonance with who can you trust if you know that inside as a five-year-old? This is how you know yourself to be.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“Confusing. It was confusing because I didn't have language yet. I didn't know how to articulate what I was feeling in rebuttal to the people who are charged with my care. I came into the world supposedly knowing to trust my mother, knowing to trust my father, you know, as a young person, you have much agency or decision making. That's right. And so you just go wherever people pick you up and take you and say that this is the way the world is.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“And it's also interesting too in the sense of I couldn't fault the people who are telling me that because that's all they learn the world.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source
“But the interesting thing is also I knew it was wrong to do that That's how much I had internalized all of the messages around me.”
2018-02-07 · Oprah's Super Soul · Janet Mock: Redefining Realness · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source