YouSaid · the spoken record

Kelly Slater

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2020-09-08
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2020-09-08
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  1. “They were, well, they were sort of like personal exercise courses, maybe metaphysical, if you will. I don't know, just where you spend a lot of time with other people and do these processes of being the listener or being the person who has problems or overseeing those things and doing these little exercise and then just talking about your feelings, just like simple stuff, like really simple stuff. In the course, they kind of ask you to not really talk about it too much outside of it, but we would just do these exercises. And then afterwards you talk about how you feel and you relate those feelings to the rest of your life and the way that you as a person approach and experience life. So you just kind of look at all your filters. And it's just an experiential kind of exercise. And I started realizing that even in the simplest things that you do every day, the way you wake up and think about them and approach them is how you approach life. And so everything's kind of a metaphor of another thing.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  2. “Some things that were not so pretty at the time. I think he saw that with me. You know, he just saw that I was learning quickly. We were doing these courses together and he was helping me a lot. Was able to talk about things that I couldn't talk about with anyone else before in my life. And so I think it wasn't so much a challenge to me as it was, hey, I see something special here that can make you feel good. And I think you could fix these things up and it'll make every other aspect of your life better and more coherent and happy. So it's kind of one of those things.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  3. “Well, because Trevor, you know, he was one of my best friends, or still is on a deep level, but we just don't spend a lot of time together these days. We've been kind of off in different directions. But Trevor was like a six-time Ironman champion in Australia. And he'd been through a lot of the sort of emotional and financial and stardom, if you will, pitfalls that can happen. On his own level, he had had a lot of that stuff happen to him. He was able to get through it. He had, you know, and I wouldn't say anything that he hasn't stated publicly or whatever, but, you know, he went through divorce and money problems and all sorts of things. And he was able to eventually work it out. And he got married again. His current wife and his ex-wife are best of friends. All the kids get along. Like he really has a happy, healthy situation coming out of it.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  4. “So, when I was confronted with the fact that I might need to be the person to kind of help mend a lot of these issues in the family, I resented that because I was longing for someone else to do it and I wouldn't have to do the work and I wouldn't have to come up with those answers. And it's easier if it's not you.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  5. “And I think I kind of longed to be put back in that place of like I'm the middle child. I'm not the oldest. You're my mom. You're my older brother. You're my dad. I'm probably getting ahead of myself here because some of these conversations haven't fully been aired out. But there's just a dynamic that happens. And I'm not placing blame on anyone for those, but just trying to kind of objectively look and understand because I'm still growing through this stuff. you know, wanting to understand it from all perspectives. I did become like a mediator in my family. You know, I was scared for my parents to break up as a kid and I just imagined in my head, I think I lived in this dreamland where everyone got along and it was a movie and it was a happy ending. And, you know, it's not always the case. You know, the happy ending comes when all the lessons are learned usually.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  6. “Someone in that position. And it needs to be handled with care and it needs, you know, might need some help. And we didn't have that helper understanding. And so all of us, I think, suffered through that time. So, you know, in 2003, if we're going to fast forward to the When my friend said that to me, my friend Trevor, he said, maybe you're the one who needs to sort of handle this because you're aware of it, you know, all the problems that are going on in their family. And, you know, there's things you can see about your mom's struggle that you could help and your brother and blah, blah, things with your daughter. And I really kind of resented that because in some ways I took on a fatherly role in my family, but I was the middle child.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  7. “I have an older brother, Sean, and I think as we got into teenage years, that was probably kind of funny for him that I started doing so well and he didn't keep on that same trajectory as when we were kids. I think it was tough for him. I know it was tough for him. He recently said something to me to the effect that he wished he wasn't a pro surfer. You know, he wished he had done something else at that time, which was really sad for me to hear, you know, because we grew up just loving surfing so much and it created a life for us. It created all our travel and friendships and all these memories around the world and work. And, you know, it just became everything. And as a lot of the pressure, I think, was on me, you know, I bought a house when I was 17 and I was paying for a lot of things, you know, for everybody and that kind of thing. So there's a certain control that happens for.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  8. “Older because I did really well, you know, I obviously started winning world titles and making money and, you know, in some ways a lot of the family pressure or focus was around me. And I think if someone stands out as doing something extraordinary in a family, that's kind of natural. So my godson, he's 13. I have two godsons and one of them's 13. And he's a really good surfer. And his dad's one of my oldest best friends. And I heard him saying the other day on an interview, he said, you know, the thing about when you have a kid, he has two kids and he said something about when you have a kid who's doing really well or something, it takes so much time up for the rest of the family and so much of the focus of the family might be around that one person as opposed to equally amongst everybody. And it made me just in those past weeks since I heard that has made me think about that a lot because”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  9. “So you can maybe save the relationship or not blow it by making stupid mistakes. It should be natural to get right. So at that age, I started identifying, oh, there's some weird stuff going down in my family. There's some really unhealthy dynamics around money and around communication.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  10. “My mom worked at this little cafe on the beach that we grew up surfing in front of called the Islander Hut. And the owner's wife. I won this contest, the East Coast Championships, and when I got home, she was like, Oh my gosh, you're going to be a famous surfer one day. You're going to be a professional or whatever. She's like, you won this big competition. You need to sign something for me. And I was so embarrassed. Took me like a half an hour to sign this piece of paper. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know how to sign an autograph. And like, I remember like 15, 20 minutes later, she's like, you got that autograph from yet? And I was like, I don't even know what that means, you know. You know, fast forwarding to, you know, the context of taking, I don't know, there's a book I read as a kid that was adult children of alcoholics or something like that. And I read that probably when I was like my early 20s. And I was experiencing a lot of, I was going through a breakup. And as you do, you get really emotional during breakups and experiencing a lot of things. You want to evolve. You want to learn and grow quickly in this situation.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  11. “To the point where I didn't like to take pictures in front of people because it embarrassed me and that kind of thing. You know, I didn't like signing autographs because I just felt silly. I actually remember my first autograph when I was 10 years old.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  12. “You know, but there were other families that were worse off than mine that were friends of mine, you know, so it didn't seem that outlandish or anything, but my mom probably harbored us from a lot of the stuff and we didn't know maybe, you know, some of the things that were happening, like kids shouldn't. But, you know, a lot of my feelings are, a lot of my memories are pretty good, you know? I don't feel like I grew up in any kind of a physical abuse situation like some people have or whatever, but getting on with it. I also didn't learn a lot of skills that help me evolve and mature emotionally at a young age. So I was at times really shy when I was younger in my teenage years. For me, I was a strange mix of, I knew I had talent. So like, you know, surf-wise, it was kind of a place for me to show that. But at the same time with people or with media, that kind of thing, I was really kind of shy.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  13. “All my childhood, I think, as for most kids, it feels normal, you know, like what you know seems like the normal thing. But looking back now, my dad was drinking a lot. My mom, it really made her crazy. And, you know, when you have alcoholism or gambling or whatever you have in your family, if you have, you know, some kind of big issue like that in your family, everyone else kind of falls in line, you know, like some people are enablers, some people are mediators, some people become aggressive, some become, you know, you react to it different ways and it kind of creates this sort of maze and puzzle that all sort of makes sense in that environment, but there's a lot of unhealthy survival skills and that kind of thing.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  14. “Was kind of like his inspiration. And then when he became my rival, he said he hated me and wanted me to die, you know? So it was like It felt real personal. He had made no bones about it. He was like the first person I ever competed with. I felt was really on that level and just said, he just goes, I want to just smash all his dreams. And he would say that in interviews and stuff. You got to step up to that or step away. Yeah, it was the first time I ever felt someone that way in my face before. And in the end, I think it was really good for me. But it was tough at times.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  15. “I don't think it differed necessarily. I think it got back into the groove. You know, I think I felt out of that confident place and out of that, you know, when you get in the flow and you get in the zone, you don't question it. And if you start to question it, you kind of fall out of it. But then you get to a place where you're really, you know, I feel like if you're really mastering that feeling and that place for yourself, that you can kind of step back and watch it also and it even get stronger. You kind of embolden yourself into that. I felt like my surfing was there, my competing was there. I felt unstoppable. And I just built on that confidence. And I never questioned it. You know, I knew it wasn't going to be easy to be Andy because, you know, I really did have this light and dark good and evil kind of love, hate, all that kind of a rivalry between us. And, you know, we're very different kinds of people, but we also identified with each other a lot. And Andy grew up watching me and saying I was.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  16. “Into it, I can. And I just took a totally different headspace than 2004 when I just kind of shied away from the whole thing. And then it just all just fell in my lap, really. Everything just kind of lined right up. And it was almost unbelievable because it felt like the Matrix kind of thing where you just see it playing out, even if you make a mistake, it plays out in your favor somehow. Whole year went that way for me.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  17. “I remember walking out as we were leaving, and I saw Joel Parkinson, who was also a world title contender. And I just said to him, I said, who's it going to be this year? Miou. One of us got to take this guy out. And I remember in that moment just feeling like I'm ready. You know, I'm not scared to lose. And I really felt like I could beat Joel and would beat Joel. And I felt very confident that, you know, with no fear and just going out and feeling it, that I could, that I would beat Andy. So that year was a huge turnaround. And Andy and I had a lot of head-to-heads. The rivalry really peaked that year. You know, like he won a Contest in Japan. And then I won a contest in South Africa. And then he won a contest and I won a contest. We were going back and forth. And I was thriving in it. I just, it was exciting me. You know, I just thought in my head, you know, I've already lost this guy before. It's not going to hurt any worse this time. So I might as well put everything.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  18. “It definitely wasn't the next day. I would say it was the next year, maybe about a year. It took me about a year to sort of, you know, get my act together and straighten a lot of things out. I remember going into the next year. My father died in O2. And then I'm pretty sure it was his birthday the following year that I lost the world title, actually on his birthday. I was still a little bit down in the dumps about that and the loss hurt so bad that I kind of just went into my shelf for most of the next year competitively speaking. And at the start of 2005, I remember we went to our opening, it's sort of the end of the year, beginning of the year banquet where they crowned the world title officially, but they also start the year. And I remember walking out of there. And at that point, Andy Irons had won 2002-3.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  19. “Believe my little brother was there too, and I just started bawling. I just broke down like everything felt wrong. And I was, you know, I knew in my heart I was going to lose a world title that day. And if you're in the right frame of mind, I think as a competitor, if you lose, it hurts, but it's not life. It's just a loss. But that was deeper because I had all these other things that it was such a clear indicator that I was off in a lot of different areas and I had some work to do. And those things are painful sometimes. And, you know, it wasn't one of those days”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  20. “The whole night she was fighting with my mom. It was just a nightmare. Sounds terrible. Oh, it's terrible. It was terrible. I woke up the next, I didn't even wake up the next morning. I didn't sleep. Maybe I got 30 minutes, 40 minutes of sleep that night. I walked out of my house the next morning and walked behind the house and I saw two friends of mine and”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  21. “Had to bring that up, huh, Tim? I did, you know, just Mortal superhuman Kelly Slater, you know, figure we'll store. I'm kidding. Actually, I do look back at that as, I mean, obviously, there's no world title is sitting in your hands. It slips through that you're not upset about on some level. But if I could go back and change anything, I really don't think I would because it was a real, very clear indication of where things were going wrong for me. Also, to sort of charge the battery back up, make me dig deeper and competitively speaking and skill set speaking with my surfing and motivation, all these things. It was just kind of a reset for me. It was rebooting the software in my brain in a lot of ways. And those are tough lessons. I lost that world title of Andy Irons. And I was in a relationship that was just wrong. I literally didn't sleep the night before that competition in a fight with my then-girlfriend that literally.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  22. “And I was going for a world title in the early 2000s over there. And I drank a coffee one morning to wake up and I got the jitter so bad. I fell off on every wave. I caught in this heat. It was a really crucial heat for me to try and win. And if I won that heat, it was pretty much a shoe-in for the world title that year. And I did everything possible to lose that heat and somehow won it. But it was because I drank a big coffee in the morning, didn't have any food. So it really kind of scared me away from coffee.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  23. “They're pure. No, I've never been a coffee drinker. I intentionally have really kind of stayed away from coffee. I feel like I drink it a little bit now just to be ready for it. But this one time I went to, this is the reason I really don't drink coffee. I went to France and we spend sort of the two months prior to going to France to compete on West Coast time and Tahitian time. And those are the events prior to going over to Europe. We get to Europe and we compete within like a day or two of getting there. And it's nine hour time difference going east. And that's the hardest thing when you fly east. I don't care if it's from west coast to east coast. Even three hours is tough to get back on track. But when I fly over to Europe, it's really hard for me. It takes me almost a month to feel like I get into like a morning routine.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  24. “Do a little bit, but I'm 100% not a coffee addict. I don't know really what good coffee is. I kind of like to smell a coffee more than I like the taste of it.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  25. “Not true, it is, yeah, just to get a little warmth going in the body, loosen up. Obviously, Lemon's really good for you. It's alkalizing, even though it's an acid, it's alkalizing in the body and it's got a lot of minerals and some vitamins. Just a nice clean way to kind of wake your system up. And to me, it feels better than putting something heavy in my body.”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  26. “I actually do take a lot of baths just because it's kind of an easy way to just let your body detox in hot water. And I did, you know, for about the last two months, I haven't been working out or really even surfing very much. So this past week, I started working out again and kind of built up a lot of the lactic acid in the muscles. I was working out with a friend of mine who's like a brother, Tom Carroll, who was two-time world champ back in the early 80s. fellow surfer lives right up the street here from where i'm staying and uh we spent a lot of time together over the years surfing and training together but uh did a workout the other day and uh i've been surfing the last couple days yesterday i surfed pretty hard and the day before that i surfed a bunch and uh so you know there's muscles are just getting kind of worked again that i don't usually uh sit and and uh let the lethargic side of me build up too much especially this time of year i'm surfing almost every day usually”

    2020-09-08 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #461: Kelly Slater — The Surfing Legend on Routine, Rickson Gracie, Favorite Books, and Overcoming Setbacks · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT