YouSaid · the spoken record

Neha Ruch

lines on the record: 29
first: 2025-01-21
most recent: 2025-01-21
sittings or episodes: 1
sources: podcast

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“I would just say so often people feel like they're stuck or they're in one place and they're not moving forward. I think when you step into a career break, we can very easily feel like, well, our success metric is now how well our kids behave or, you know, how well they do in school. And the reality is our job is to be present and do our very best to raise our children aligned with our values. But our success in this chapter is also our own. And part of the strategic roadmap that I share with the PowerPaz is being able to set your own personal and professional goals that are authentic to you, right? And giving yourself those small metrics of success allow you to feel like you're moving forward in a way that will ultimately be the right direction and it's going to lead you to the next step where you're meant to be.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Start to connect backwards. I spoke to a woman who had coordinated a new bus route for her local school system, right? And what that revealed to her was that when she wrote down, implemented highly complicated infrastructure update for local community, right? A, that sounds impressive under the bullet of career sabbatical for family life. And B, what it revealed to her was that she was really strong in project management. And that ended up being a talking point on her resume. So you don't have to go word vomit on them about how, you know, you grew in terms of, you know, personal growth and therapy and you finally healed all your wounds around reactivity, but you can sort of extract the bullets that are applicable to the job that you're looking for, but that takes being able to really take the time and intention to take stock of those over the course of.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“A parent is looking to return, I highly suggest they start that process as soon as they feel that little nudge. If they can take some time to really crystallize what it is they want to do, we offer resources on site to be able to work with coaches or resume writers, but even before you do all of that, you can look at all those skills and accomplishments that we talked about auditing. And when you're ready, start auditing how you spend your time on a week-to-week basis and what the moments or activities are that you feel the most proud of, whether you advise your partner on a marketing campaign for their tech company. That was me. I did that. Whether it's volunteering for your school's family education forum and whatever those activities are start to be able to take stock of those because those dots after a year.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“To is actually within the employers in really changing the minds of HR managers. I don't see a world that we're getting to a place where they're going to sit across from a returner and say to them, tell us about that career portfolio of non-traditional experiences and how it added to your skills. But I think we can get to a place where we can reduce the bias when they're looking at two resumes side by side.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“If we can get to a place that we can give stipends for families who opt for one parent to be at home, then we can reduce the burden on the childcare system. We can start to make pausing a real financial possibility for parents, you know, at a base level. I love the work of moms first because I think that paid family leave allows parents to be able to make this choice, whatever their choice be. You know, I think that there's other sides of this. I really talk a lot about universal health care because I think if we had that as an option, more parents would be able to shift into freelance and consulting opportunities so that both partners would get the flexibility they need to be able to raise their family in different seasons. You know, the work that I'm most closely tied.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Or on a career pause. And you know, I would get to a new year in 2017, it was really growing. And then 2018, I had my second child, which brought me to my knees. And then 2019, I was like, well, this is my year and, you know, the pandemic happened. But then timing is everything because I came out of that and the world was finally reexamining work and family. And my children were aging into school. And so I was ready. to put more in and I was ready to step into a thought leadership position on this because I had been living it and writing about it and researching about it and interviewing it for all those years even if it didn't look impressive on the outside”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Say to them, no, this is how I'm taking on like a big cultural change, and I'm just this is how I can do it in a small way while my kid's napping and, you know, I think it was maybe it was Jeff Bezos who said, you know, you have to be willing to be misunderstood for a long time. And I think that that was the gift of parenthood, right? Because you're always making choices that not everyone understands. And I got to plant seeds for this work. I wanted to dabble in content. wasn't making money early on and so I set those sort of clear success metrics that were learning impact and networking and so I would say I will go to different motherhood content entrepreneur networking event each quarter I will write three blog posts a week I will start this Instagram channel and it was small early on there's there is an irony in trying to build the first platform for women on career pods”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Our skills don't evaporate, right? And our interests don't evaporate when we step into a career break. And I say this to all women, like audit the things about your career that you are really proud of when you step into a career pause because you don't want to lose sight of those. Those go with you in your identity, even if you don't have that pithy titled. And I loved brand. I loved marketing. I really found content and content that women absorbed fascinating. And then when I stepped into this career pause, I thought, okay, well, now I've already parted with the ego of leaving my career. I might as well start dabbling with something else. And I will tell you that in this culture, we have a way of diminishing small projects and passion projects and lifestyle businesses and little blogs. And I remember going to my five-year Stanford Business School reunion and someone like overhearing people whispering or snickering about that little blog. And, you know, of course, I wanted.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Own work to be at home was his like unofficial, you know, head of human resources, right? She would get the new employees set up in the school system. She would entertain all of the partners. She would sort of be the emotional sounding board. And I remember in my teens being so mad at my mom as teenage girls will be. And I was like, it's not even your, you know, she probably didn't give me money for an Abwa crumpy shirt. I have no idea. But, you know, I said something about it not being her money. And that day, I've never heard him really lose it on me, but he just turned around and he said, never say that again. It's more hers than it will ever be mine. She's done more to establish us in this country than the rest of us. Was able to do it in a way that I was really secure in my contributions.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So, my dad immigrated with a company called Infosys, and he built that company in the States and then became a venture capitalist. And when he and I were walking around Union Square and I was pushing a little toddler around, I shared this idea that most people thought was like, oh, she's giving up her Stanford Business School degree and this impressive salary to like write a mom blog. And he looked at me and he said, I know that you're taking on a big mission. He saw the worth in it when no one else did. And I think sometimes we need that other person who believes we can do it. And he believes that something doesn't have to look big to be big. But I think beyond that, he was really in the startup grind, you know, through my early years in America and then through my teens. My mother, who had paused her.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I think what I've seen anecdotally is that men and women face different dynamics around societal expectations of what caregiving looks like. I had a brilliant writer write this for me, Tao Tai. She talked about her own experience where her husband stayed at home for two years and then she stayed at home for two years. And when she stepped in to stay-at-home motherhood, she was so excited because her husband seemed like he had such a fun time. Except she was like warned the bone because she was baking cookies. She was on the PTA. She was doing crafts and she was totally run ragged. And finally her husband looked at her and was like, why are you trying to get the approval from some nebulous good parenting committee? I didn't do any of this. And she realized she was operating at some standard where to prove her worth as a stay-at-home mom, she needed to be a super mom.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I think there is still a recalibration around ambition and success. There's still a roadmap we all need to be able to walk through those rooms with our head held high and be able to answer that question. What do you do and rethink, well, if I'm not making income and I'm not getting promotions, how do I define success so that I feel like I'm not stuck and that I'm moving forward towards goals that will Orient me in the right direction, right? All of that holds true.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“For us. And that joint household investment, that joint household interdependence then has a ripple effect of the home parent being able to say, you know what, I deserve breaks as well because too often we see women and I was guilty of this as well saying, well, if I part with my paid work, now my entire value is in taking care of the house and I no longer deserve support. And I certainly can't invest in paid help. And obviously that is a flawed mindset because what we know as our children are best served with whole and healthy parents. And so what we want to be able to do is also rethink then when we're investing in maybe 10 hours of a babysitter or we're saying let's block and tackle on the weekend so we each get breaks. We're saying both parents are contributing, both parents deserve care and support and no one should be working 24-7 without breaks.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Assume and really reiterate is that the partnership in the case of a two parent household now takes on this idea that it's an interdependent household because whether or not you are pausing your work because of financial considerations, a lot of women contend with this idea that they're giving up their financial independence. And when you feel like you no longer have financial dignity, it can really make it hard to invest time back into yourself. So before you pause As you make that decision to how are you going to support your family in this next chapter ideally that is a conversation you're having three to six months out you're going through that budgeting exercise together and you're making really conscious decisions whether it's we are together going to reduce our spending on travel or entertaining our friends to be able to accommodate that loss of income because we together are deciding that one partner at home makes sense.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“One in three women feel forced to pause their careers because of the cost of childcare. For so long, stay-at-home motherhood was conflated with luxury. And as luxury, we assume that it is not worky of support. And we don't pay attention to it in the really complicated conversation about how do we support caregivers. As partners shift to provide the unpaid work in the home.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And a lot of women will change their positions and their industry upon return. And they may actually, and we see this in the data, value flexibility and more meaning, even over salary.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Our careers, and you know this, I think you've spoken to this before, are getting longer, right? So we're looking at a longer game and pauses help make that a sustainable long game where you have to be able to reset your perspectives and bring in non-traditional experience so that you're rounding out that portfolio of work. And what we see women report on returning is that the number one thing they say that has changed is their perspective, their ability to understand their relationship to work, to hold it with less urgency, but be more efficient and be able to manage their time and their priorities. And I think that that can be a real superpower. But I think beyond that, what we see is women report how it shapes their desire to do work of meaning, you know, time at home gives you a front row seat to the day-to-day issues that come up in your community.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Respected as such, I would go one step further though to say that it's not just those care tasks that I think we deem as easily outsourceable. It's the really intellectual and emotional labor. And so it's much more complicated work. And I think if we can dignify it as such, we can start to not just assign it value, but I think we can start to elevate our perception of how that work can shape professionals' experience and perspective on the other side.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“We've diminished the value of care for a long time. First of all, just like economically, it doesn't have a line item on the GDP. I know there are peers of mine who are working on that, Eve Rodsky, with her tremendous work with Fairplay and the Fairplay Institute are really advocating for that. But when you don't have a place in the GDP, then it gets diminished. And then you add to that that it's work that is assumed to be done out of love, which of course is, but it still comes with value. So salary.com did their own survey and their own math to say, well, if a home parent was assigned value based on all the roles, chauffeur, chef, educator, then they would be making $184,000 a year. No one's assigning that salary, but the world, you know, that data is meant to signify that this is actual work of value and parents who are doing that work should be valued.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And be able to remain active and engaged so they could ultimately have more choices available to them on the other side and less penalty. Women are having children at the age of age across the country of 30, and that's dues higher on the coast. So they're clocking in more education, more work experience like myself, right? I'd already done a decade in brand marketing. And then they have more equitable relationships with their partners, like what we just talked about. Dads are spending three times the amount of time with their kids than any generation prior. So it's not like these women are like serving their husband a cocktail and a plate of cookies at the end of the day. We want to do is be able to showcase how women and men are able to grow not just in the minute to minute of caregiving, which we know is demanding in leadership training in and of itself, but how they're actually sharpening their skills in new ways.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Planning a career pause in the next two years. One and two are planning a downshift of hours. Those 90% of women on pause aim to return. So really, we are ever evolving and ever shifting. But for a while, you know, we were sort of facing those black and white notions and having to convince whether it was media or publishers that this work was not anti-feminist. It was not about setting women back to defending tradition in the home. It was about introducing new valid options to help women be able to step into a career pause or downshift.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Better. And what we know now is, first of all, all the research shows that whether you're working out of the home or in the home or existing in between, you can produce healthy and happy outcomes for your children. Also, what we know is that from our research last year, one in three women working out of the home”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Well, you're looking at, first of all, a generation of women, oftentimes at publishing houses and in the media who have clocked in a lot of time in the workforce and they were, we've all been served these sort of black and white ideas as stay-at-home and working. And for so long, especially among women, right? And I want to say now that one in five stay-at-home parents are fathers, actually, and that number is ticking upward. But stay-at-home and working mothers were pitted against each other for a long time. The sort of rise of the quote-unquote mommy wars happened in the 80s and 90s. That label was invented by media to talk about how what sort of one side was associating with staying at home because they wanted secure attachment with their children. And one side was working out of the home because they wanted to model ambition for their children. And the reality is we made it about the kids, which like naturally, as soon as you make things about the kids, it's going to raise your defensiveness, right? And then you dig in your heels and say, well, my way is better and my way is better.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Live to focus on raising children, mental health, family health, and yet you're still holding room to move forward towards more authentic goals, expand your network in new ways, explore new ideas, and ultimately really reshape your perspective so that when and if you're entering the workforce, again, you're bringing with you a whole new portfolio of experiences. And what we want to do is be able to dignify that stage of life so that when and if women need or want to pause, they can be respected and supported and ultimately have an easier time getting back in.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“When I stepped into my own chapter of stay at home motherhood, I was gobsmacked by just the sheer amount of pushback, whether it was from peers or family members wondering like, what are you going to do all day? Are you going to be bored? Did you really waste that education at Stanford that you mentioned before? And the reality was I was hearing from them that I was in some way giving up or being counted out. And the reality for me, like 90% of women on career pauses today is that I did aim to return to the workforce. This was just one chapter and I wanted time with my child. I wanted time to surround myself with new experiences and see what came next. But by no means did I intend to stop growing. And the goal of the PowerPause is really to reframe the conversation as one chapter where you're shifting priorities. You're shifting your time away from paid work to focus on family.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“When they think of the working mother, they will say Michelle Obama. One is fact, one is fiction. And so the goal right now is to update the perception of the modern woman on pause because she is very different and she is really ever shifting and ever evolving on like a much more gray spectrum between work and family.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Don't think we've landed on a better term, but you know, if we back up. The phrase stay at home mother just by pure sociolinguistics is flawed, right? Stay at implies stagnancy. Working is an active verb. So just by nature of the language, it sets us up to fail. Let's look at the 1970s and we had the second wave of feminism, right? And we were trying to prove women's capacity in the workforce. And the media really was able to continue to create new narratives show women archetypes in work. And yet we left behind anyone at home with apron strengths, with the June Cleaver archetype, right? To this day, if you pull the American public, we ran a survey in 2023 of a thousand members of the general population, 1,200 women in downshifted careers. And when asked who they think of, when they think of the stay-at-home mother, they will still say June Cleaver.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I think we lean on the answer to what you do in place of who are you. And so for a long time, I got to say, I run brand at a tech startup. And in like a few pithy words, I was saying like I run. So I'm a leadership position brand, so I'm somewhat creative. And a tech startup, so I was, you know, somewhat ahead of the curve or a risk taker. And so it conveys a lot about you. And then when you part with that, you realize, wait a second, we have more expansive identities. All those skills and accomplishments go with us. So for a while, I word vama. You know, people would ask what you do and stay at home mom for reasons we'll go into didn't quite fit. And so I started to perfect right now. I get to be with my kids. We'll see what comes next. And what's been interesting is I shift back to more work outside of the home in launching this book is now I stumble because I want to say I'm mostly with my kids, but I'm not. That's not where I am. My kids are in school.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Not like these women are like serving their husband or cocktail and a plate of cookies at the end of the day. Women and men are able to grow not just in the minute to minute of caregiving, which we know is demanding and leadership training in and of itself, but how they're actually sharpening their skills in new ways such that they're not counted out of the workforce. One in three women working out of the home are planning a career pause in the next two years. One in two are planning a downshift of hours. Those 90% of women on pause aim to return. So the goal right now is to update the perception of the modern woman on pause because she is really ever shifting and ever evolving on like a much more gray spectrum between work and family.”
2025-01-21 · Masters of Scale · Redefining work-life balance, with Neha Ruch · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT