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Sahil Bloom

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2025-02-07
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2025-02-07
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  1. create value, just focus on creating value. If you create value for the people around you, you will receive value in return. You will always find success. And if you can do that while just becoming a reliable person, I think that is the most important thing. My grandfather gave me a piece of advice when I was younger and he said, you will achieve more by being consistently reliable than by being occasionally extraordinary. And I've never forgotten that.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  2. You're preaching to the choir. Project Hail Mary was one of my favorites, Andy Weir. He's the author of The Martian, among other things. That's fantastic. If you're looking for a short story that you can read in five minutes, go read the Egg by Andy Weir. You can find it anywhere online. It's incredible.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  3. Paul Callanathy. He was a Stanford neurosurgeon who got diagnosed with terminal cancer, and he wrote the book in the last year of his life. Everyone says man search for meaning. I think man searched for meaning is wonderful. I actually think when breath becomes air is a more impactful book for the modern era.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  4. We talked about Tim Cook. He's been an incredible mentor on this journey and felt a lot of courage to take this different and unique path through him.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  5. My wife and I are really enjoying the new season of Dexter. Really? Yeah, Dexter, I think it's like new beginnings or something like that. Yeah, it's great. I loved Dexter back in the day. So this new take on his childhood years is really good

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  6. And in the midst of something very sad, there was something very beautiful that came from it, which was this decision to reject common convention and choose love was a decision that had ripple effects through my entire life and really is ingrained in my DNA. And I am very grateful for that.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  7. Yeah, my mom was born and raised in Bangalore, India. My dad, from a Jewish family in the Bronx, New York. And when they crossed paths at Princeton University, basically a two-week period that they crossed over there, my dad was finishing his PhD. My mom was just starting a master's there. And they went on a date. My dad told my mom, my parents will never accept us. And my mom was so blinded by the use of the word us that she completely missed the message. And unfortunately, he was right. His father was not accepting and told him that he had to choose between my mom and his family. And he walked out the door. And to this day I never met my dad's parents, his father passed away many years ago, I believe. His mother's still alive. He has three siblings I've never met, first cousins that I've never met. Wow.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  8. Grand Slam. I think his name was Seth Miller, if I remember. I don't think he ended up having a baseball career. He's probably somewhere out there. So if he hears this, shout out Seth Miller. Yeah

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  9. Yeah, this is my last hurrah. Maybe it's me trying to relive the glory or anti-glory days. I was a pitcher at Stanford, and this was in the NCA super regionals, which is the final 16 teams in the country. And I came into this game at Florida State on ESPN. My whole family watching, all my friends from home. So excited that I'm pitching on national television. And I gave up a monster Grand Slam that ended the game effectively. And we lost and had to go home. And the funniest part about it was like, you know, I was obviously distraught and I'm at the team hotel after I'm really upset. And I get a text from one of my best friends in the world just saying like, hey man, safe flight home. Hope the plane doesn't get hit by that home run you just gave up. Who was the guy who hit the hit?

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  10. I shouldn't tell him that. He'll get mad at me. I'm wearing a Koros. Yeah, running watch. He'd probably get mad at me. I just don't really care. What I really care about is learning from people. And he has incredible access to people and stories and his understanding of geopolitics, which is an area I have extreme interest in given my public policy background. I just feel like I learn so much from being around him. Plus, he's someone that has navigated some incredible different changes in his own life and his path he was on a traditional path at IBM, stepped off it to go to this computer startup compaq, then got picked up by Steve Jobs at Apple. And I can benefit so much from just learning and understanding from being around someone like that.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  11. I just don't remember there being a next conversation that was particularly significant, but I did ask him if he'd be willing to grab breakfast and just chat about my career and things that I was trying to learn. I wasn't looking for a job, so I was very clear, like, I'm not pitching you on something. I would just love to learn from you. And I think that stands out. Like in a world of people that are very short-term focused and looking for the transaction, the networking, right? I've just never been someone that believes in networking. I really build and believe in building 50-year relationships with people. And I think in 10 years of knowing Tim, the number of times we've talked about Apple, I can probably count on like one.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  12. 2017, 2018, he had become more prominent. People were starting to come up to him at the gym and pitch him on things, etc. And so, you know, I think then his life really started to change based on the growth that they had experienced.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  13. Yeah, I mean, the thing you learn about people that have achieved on that level of success is that their entire life is actually quite lonely in the sense that everyone that they meet wants something. Everyone that they meet is coming to them with a handout. And so I actually think it's rare that they can find environments where they can just feel like a normal person in that way. And Tim is a quite introverted person just as a human being. And so it's actually interesting having seen his journey now. He wasn't as famous then as he is now. you know went to the Berkshire Hathaway annual meeting last year with him and when we walked into the arena to go take our seats it was like walking in somewhere with Justin Bieber I mean like I've never experienced anything like that in terms of the people rushing circling you know like it is a very different life than at the time when he didn't even need security at the time like there wasn't a fanfare around it you know it very quickly did start to change by like

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  14. He was, I think, in 2014. You'd have to fact check me on this. I think he was the new CEO. I think maybe the year before he'd become CEO. He was not treated any differently than anyone in the gym in that setting. And to the point where I didn't know who he was for six months, I was talking to him every day. I wasn't in tech. I wasn't like in that world. And he doesn't look the way he looks on stage when he's working out in the gym in the morning. And so I talked to him every day for about six months before I knew who he was.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  15. The way that I know Tim might make you want to buy more apple stock, I am not an investor in Apple. I don't own any Apple stock other than via S&P 500 index funds. But I am a huge, huge fan of Tim's as a human being. I met him originally in 2014 when I first started, took my first job. I was working out at the gym at 445 in the morning every single day. He was one of five other people that was crazy enough to show up at the gym at 4.45 every single day. To this day, I know that he continues and maintains that habit, albeit at a private facility now, because he's a big enough figure that he cannot go to a public gym in the way that he did then. But it ended up sparking a friendship and a mentorship that has lasted through these years. He was an incredible force in giving me the courage to leave the path that I was on and walk down this non-traditional one and was kind enough to read and provide that blurred book.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  16. Is a better flex than a Rolex on your wrist. It's just the reality because you have to earn it. And so people that see you know certain things about you about the way that you operate as a human being. That confers upon you the respect and admiration that you seek much more than any fancy thing that you can buy

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  17. Absolutely. You also just have to know that when people are status signaling in those ways with bot status, I talk about in the book the difference between bot status and earned status. Status is important. It's part of our social hierarchy, how we operate as human beings. Really what we're seeking is to have respect and admiration from people that we care about. And people think they can buy that. But you cannot. No one is giving you the lasting, durable respect and admiration for buying a fancy thing. No one cares. Because then we would respect and admire lottery winners more than anyone else in the world. Look, they made a billion dollars. Okay, now I respect and admire you. No, that's not how it works. A CEO, if you want a CEO to respect you, you have to build something. You have to build something meaningful to earn the respect of that person. So that is earned status. It is working on things that you have to earn. That's why I say that a fit physique.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  18. Physical health. Your actual healthy aging was determined by your relationship satisfaction in your youth. And it wasn't your blood pressure, it wasn't your cholesterol, it wasn't your smoking or drinking habits. It was how you felt about the people in your life. And so not investing in your social wealth, as I talk about it in the book, is something that is going to come back and hurt you. And I say investing because that's a very important meta term for the entire book. We all know Bloomberg Radio, you know the power of investing in financial assets. You know that if you invest $100 today, it's going to compound in value in your life into the future. You know that investing $100 today is better than zero dollars today because of that compounding. That applies to every single area of your life. Investing a little bit in your relationships today will compound in value in those relationships for the long term. And your relationships, I would argue, are the single greatest investment you can make. They will pay dividends in your health and in your happy.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  19. Yeah, totally. And by the way, that's the whole meme of the person that's standing in front of the private jet telling you that you can get rich trading. They got rich by selling you the course, not by actually trading. And look, there's an entire legacy of people that have done that very successfully, by the way, because it's a tried and true business model, apparently, but it's sad. Jonathan Haight, you know, anxious generation, just published this incredible book on this exact. Published a book on the exact thing of just how detrimental social media has been to our youngest generation in particular.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  20. It can be a force for good. And look, you're talking to someone who has made a career out of being on social media in some way. And I think that the difference is whether the content that's being shared is designed to educate and create value versus make you feel like you're not enough, make you feel like you're not doing enough, or it's trying to sell some sort of course or community to convince you that you can get rich quickly, which are clearly bad things.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  21. So, you have this insane expectation that has been created by social media of how easy it is to make money. And this loss of the understanding that the only way to make money is to create value. You create value and you receive value. The only way to make a lot of money is to create a lot of value and capture a little portion of that along the way. And so really the entire focus needs to just be identify a problem, create a solution, and then scale that solution. The more scalable, the more money you'll make.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  22. Business overnight. You cannot build a meaningful relationship. You can't build a healthy body. These things have to be hard. That is why they are valuable. If they weren't so hard, you actually wouldn't value them as much. And yet you live in a world where everyone is seeking the shortcut or the cheat code or the hack or the quick way to make a million dollars or $10 million. And look, I just saw this incredible chart that showed that the amount of money that each generation thinks it requires to make it And it was like a chart that basically showed that all the other generations like boomers on through millennials, it was like around $200,000 or ish a year. And then Gen Z said like $600,000 is what you need to make. So there's this crazy thing that's happening in terms of our expectations of what we should be earning. And also, by the way, 80% of the Gen Zers that were interviewed said that they thought they would do that.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  23. Disconnect more often. I think that a lot of FOMO in the modern day is driven by these things that we carry in our pockets. And the fact that we are connected at all times to this constant dopamine drip of information, which frankly is designed to convince you that you are not doing enough, that you are not doing the right things, that you should be with someone else doing something else, you know, thinking something else. That is what gets clicks and what gets shared on social media. And so that's what you were hit with. And that is really dangerous because look, it convinces you to make bad short-term decisions. We all know this, that the most valuable things in life. The reason they are so valuable is because they are hard to earn. There's no such thing as a shortcut or a hack to achieve the most meaningful things in life. You cannot build a meaningful

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  24. One of my favorite stories, and it's very simple and heller were at the home of this billionaire. And Vonnegut says to Heller, Joe, how does it feel that just yesterday, the owner of this home made more money than your famous book, Catch 22, made in its entire lifetime? And Heller replies, Yes, but I've got something he'll never have. And Vonnegan says, yeah, what's that? And Joseph Heller just says the knowledge that I've got enough. And that idea of enough is really at the heart of this entire book, really defining what enough means to you and having that clear as a picture in your mind is so important because in the absence of that knowledge, you just chase whatever more the world tells you you should want.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  25. Love that My wife and I talk about this a lot that all of these sort of quote unquote upgrades that we think we're supposed to make in life Running the risk of buying yourself a headache. I mean, the house you go by, the second home you buy ends up being the second home you complain about. I don't know a single person actually that has a second home that doesn't complain about some aspect of owning a second home. And so like the thing that you bought thinking, oh, it was going to be this amazing set of experiences, you have to be comfortable with the knowledge that it may just end up being that headache that you just bought for yourself in your life. And so I often think about the value that comes from just avoiding unforced errors in life, like the Charlie Monger know where you're going to die so that you never go there. And I sometimes think that these things that we stretch for thinking that they are going to materially improve our life or happiness end up actually being the thing that detracts from it.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  26. This is a story from a friend who had sold his company and made a whole lot of money, you know, tens, maybe a hundred million dollars. And after the event, he had decided to take a bunch of his closest family and friends on this yacht trip. He was going to rent this yacht for a week and take everyone as a celebration. And he was so excited. It was so gratifying to him to be able to have created this moment for everyone. And everyone arrives to go get on this beautiful boat. And one of his friends, as he walks up, looks over at the mooring next to it and sees this way bigger boat and says, wow, I wonder who's on that boat pointing over at it. And in that moment, all of the joy of the experience that my friend had felt melted in the face of this comparison to this boat at the next morning. And the lesson there is a very powerful one, which is there's always going to be a bigger boat.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  27. Right? You talk about being in a place surrounded by people you love, healthy of body and mind, feeling some sort of meaning or purpose in the things that you're doing. So it's really about that freedom. It's really about the people. It's really about your health. It's about your purpose. Those are the things that we're actually after. But then when you ask those people what they're doing on a daily basis to create that future, it couldn't be more disjointed. The actions actually aren't leading you to that future you're trying to create for yourself.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  28. Think the most surprising thing or interesting thing was everyone sort of wants the same thing and it has very little to do with money. Money is sort of a tool but not the goal, which is surprising as a young person to hear that because when you're young, you're barraged and bombarded by information that's like, oh, you know, money, money, money, right? Fast cars, watches, all these fancy things, that's how you're going to be happy. But what you learn when you talk to people at the end and the advice they would give to their younger selves is always basically around four things. Time, people, purpose, and health. Those are the four things that come up again and again. Money is an enabler to some of those, but it is not an end in and of itself. If you ask young people to define their ideal day at age 80, no one talks about being on a private jet by themselves.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  29. On your phone, on any of the things. And I have friends who are obsessed with just checking that over and over and over again. And so again, when you are measuring that, you are going to focus on it. It's going to consume all of your energy. And we are wired to want to see the number go up. So we take actions to do that. But if the actions to do that are actually pulling you away from your longer-term goal in other areas, then that's not positive. And that comes from the fact that the scoreboard is incomplete. It's not that the scoreboard is completely wrong. It is that it is incomplete. It is only around money. We need to measure these other areas of life, the other four types of wealth in the book.

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  30. We are obsessed with tracking and measuring ourselves. And I think in a world of ability to do that on a real-time basis has become more and more readily available, we become more and more obsessed, right? Like when you were young, you could not track your net worth down to the minute. You probably just couldn't. I mean, at some point, you know, if you were buying stock in a company, like you had to check the daily thing that came up in the newspaper, like when my dad was a kid versus now literally instantaneously, you can see changes in your network.

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  31. It's about really figuring out where you are on that spectrum from fisherman to investment banker and then going and taking action to actually create your life around that definition.

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  32. Looks at him and says, And then what? And the banker says, What do you mean, and then what? Then you can retire and you can move to a small fishing village. You can fish for a few hours in the morning and then you can have lunch with your wife, you take a nap, and then in the evenings you can go into town, drink wine and play music and laugh with your friends. And look, the story is typically interpreted as saying that the banker is wrong and the fisherman is right. And I actually disagree with that. And I talk about this in the book. What I think the meaning of the story is defining your version of a meaningful life and then going and building your life with actions around those things. For the banker, his definition of success, his version of a meaningful life might be creating something big, creating a bunch of jobs, creating something around his purpose, creating things of value. For the fisherman, he's already living his definition of his meaningful life. He's already in it. And so neither one of them is right or wrong.

    2025-02-07 · Masters in Business · Understanding 'The 5 Types of Wealth' with Sahil Bloom · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT · source

  33. Yeah, one of my favorite stories is that whole idea of the fishermen and the investment banker. You have a story of an investment banker goes down to a Mexican fishing village and he comes upon this fisherman who's on a boat and has caught a few fish. And he says, how long did it take you to catch those fish? The fisherman says, only a little while. And the banker is confused. He says, why didn't you fish for longer? The fisherman says, well, I have all I need. I fish for a little while in the morning, catch a few fish, then I go home, have lunch with my wife, take a nap, and then in the evenings I go into town and drink wine and play music and laugh with my friends. And the banker's like, you're doing this all wrong. Here's what you have to do. You have to fish for longer so you can catch more fish. Then you use the profits from that to buy a second boat. You hire people, and they catch fish, then you buy a third boat, fourth boat, you create a huge fishing enterprise, you move to the big city, take the company public, and you'll make millions.

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  34. This treadmill that they're currently on. And so the insight there is that it's not money that buys you freedom. It is thoughtfully designed and invested money that gets you the freedom. It is the actual way that you construct and create your life that is has to be free.

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  35. Yeah, Oliver is a wonderful modern day philosopher. He has a new book called Meditation for Mortals, which is also similarly fantastic. And I think it is exactly that. Look, I think that time wealth, really what it's about is it is the freedom to choose. Who you spend your time with, where you spend it, how you spend it, when you trade it for other things. It is about freedom. It is about control. People think that money buys freedom. You think that money buys you that time wealth, but it's not true. I know plenty of people who work 80 to 100 hour weeks making $10 million a year. All the money in the world, but have zero freedom, zero control over their calendar because they've tied themselves into a life where they need to continue working that way to continue making that money, to continue to feed the lifestyle that they have. And they have no ability. If they don't want to work for a month, they can have all the money in the world, but they are stuck in this lifestyle.

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  36. How many weeks have you just kind of slept through, done like not much, not really remembered anything, not really been present in moments? You've just let them kind of slip by. They've just come and they've gone. And when you look at it in the perspective of that calendar and you say like, well, that's a black mark that I'm never going to get back because I was stressing about something silly or I was worried about the future or thinking about the past. It really does draw you into the present. And so I think that is a really effective way

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  37. I love that question that I asked earlier about trading lives with Buffett because it does bring to light the fact that you do place significant value on your time. You just don't know it. It's not in the front of your mind. You know, and look, I think that some of these tools that people have created, like there's this calendar, the memento Mori calendar, if you've seen it, which is you're filling in weeks of your life. So it's 52 squares across, and then it's about 80 or 90 squares going down. And so it's basically every week of the course of your life. And you fill it in so that you get this visual representation, very visceral, raw, real, of the amount of time that has passed and the amount of time you have left on average in your life. And that is, again, a little bit morbid, but also a call to action to take very seriously every single week because you think about if you zoom out and just think about.

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  38. The things that matter in your life to define what really matters to you so that you can take actions to go and build your life around those things.

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  39. A manifestation of my own journey, and that journey was really to try to understand what was a better way to measure our lives, what was a better scoreboard, if you will, that we could. Track and measure against. And the realization there is that when you measure the right thing, you take the right actions and you create the right outcomes. When you measure for the broader war of the life you're trying to live, you will take the right actions to win that war. And if all you're measuring for is the battle of money along the way, you may win that battle, but you will lose the war. And we've seen a lot of people, we all know a lot of people who have done that, who have won the money battle, but they end up with three ex-wives. They end up with six kids who don't want to have anything to do with them. They end up overweight in a really bad place mentally. All of those things are an example of winning the battle, but losing the war. And I was determined to not live that same fate because it feels very avoidable if you are thoughtful about how you design your life along the way. And so this book is an outflow of that idea. It's an outflow of creating the right scoreboard to measure.

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  40. You know, scrolling on TikTok, looking at social media, comparing ourselves to other people, low value, low energy tasks. We don't spend time with the people we care about. We do all these things that are spitting on the value of our most precious asset. And that really is the call to action around this idea. It is to recognize time as your most precious asset, to make a change, because the empowering part of all of this is you are much more in control of your time wealth than you think. We took that number the fifteen times before we die. We made a change. It's in the hundreds now. I see my parents several times a month. They're a huge part of my sons, their grandson's life. We made a change. We took an action that created time.

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  41. It's powerful and devastating, but also empowering and inspiring. And the reason I say it's empowering and inspiring is because it reminds you that time is your most precious asset. It is quite literally the only thing that matters in the end. And I go ask young people, would you trade lives with Warren Buffett? He's worth one hundred thirty billion dollars. He has everything that you want. $130 billion access to anyone in the world, flies around on private jets, you know, mansions all over the place. He reads and learns for a living. But you wouldn't trade lives with him simply because he's 95 years old. There's no way you would agree to trade the amount of time you have left for all of the billions that he has. And similarly, he would give anything to be in your shoes today and have the amount of time you do. He would give up all of his money. And so you know in the back of your mind that time has this incalculable value. And yet on a daily basis, we sit around wasting it. We scroll around on our phone.

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  42. And I just remember feeling like I had been punched in the gut. I mean, the idea that the amount of time you have left with the people you love most in the world is so finite, so countable that you can put it onto a few hands shook me to the core. And I realized in that moment that we needed to make a change or we were going to end up in a place where we didn't want to be. And so I told my wife the next day that I thought we needed to make a move. And within 45 days, I had stepped away from my full-time position at the firm. We had sold our house in California and moved 3,000 miles to be closer to both of our sets of parents.

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  43. And it all came to a head for me May of 2021. I went out for a drink with an old friend and we sat down. He asked how I was doing. And I said that it had started to get tough being as far away from my parents as we were. They'd started to get older and I started to notice their own mortality. And he asked how old they were. And I said mid sixties. And he asked how often I saw them. I said about once a year. And he just looked at me and said, okay, so you're going to see your parents fifteen more times before they die.

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  44. My relationships with my parents, I was never seeing them. We lived 3,000 miles away. They're getting older and super close to them my whole life. And I just wasn't seeing them. My relationship with my sister had ground to a halt. My wife and I were struggling to conceive at the time, unfortunately, and that was creating strain in our relationship. My health, I mean, I was drinking six or seven nights a week. you know, raging, but like it had crept up on me and that was impacting my sleep, my stress levels. All of these areas of my life had started to suffer because my priorities had gotten so focused in on like money being the exclusive thing that was going to lead me to the good life.

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  45. The other things. And the reason that I propose for that is because money is the thing that we can measure. And as Peter Drucker, the management theorist said, what gets measured gets managed means you optimize around the one thing that you can measure. And so because money is so measurable, it becomes the thing that you focus all of your energy and attention around and often to the detriment of these other things. Money is your life scoreboard, if you will. And so, you know, you might be winning on that scoreboard, but if that scoreboard doesn't capture the bigger picture of your life, you may win the battle but lose the much broader war. And that was really where I found myself when COVID hit in March of 2020. COVID hit. We were stuck at home. And it was the first time that I had really zoomed out and been able to kind of see and assess my own life. I was making money. I was getting promoted. You know, I had some of the things that you would say are like the trappings of success. But I was pretty miserable.

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  46. Yeah, absolutely. I mean, it's definitely right. I'm glad they resonated. But look, all of this to me was about my own priorities had grown so narrow to the point where I was focusing on the one thing, money, at the expense of everything else. And nothing in this book is to say that money doesn't matter. And I really want to be clear about that because I think there's this common trope of saying like, you know, you come out and you say, oh, money doesn't matter. All these other things are more important. And look, money matters. And actually the science is pretty clear on this. Money does directly buy happiness up to a point. It reduces fundamental stresses and burdens. It allows you to take care of people, create experiences. There's a lot of good. Money isn't. It simply can't be the only thing. And in my own path, and I think on a lot of people's paths, we grow so narrowly focused on money as the way to this happy good life and we lose sight of it.

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  47. Yeah, and when I was a kid, I was like really jealous. My best friend growing up had this incredible house. His family flew on private jets. They went to all these places. And, you know, like I was very jealous of all the things that he had that I didn't. And I never really questioned the fact that I would leave after hanging out with him and he would have like chef prepared meal by himself in front of the TV and I would get to go home and have dinner with my parents around the dinner table. And I never questioned whether that actually made me quite rich. And you mentioned that in the...

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  48. Yeah, we were upper middle class probably by national standards. My dad's a professor at Harvard, so he wasn't a hedge fund guy. We weren't rich. I lived in a town. Actually, I grew up in a town called Weston, Massachusetts, where a lot of my friend's parents were really successful in finance. And so I was surrounded by people who had made a lot of money.

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  49. Yeah. This was a more painful one in my own life. Probably for the first four or five years in my professional career working in private equity had an incredible experience and was learning a ton and working with a great group of people, making money, doing the things that I thought a successful life looked like. And along that path, My own priority set and the things that I was focusing on grew more and more narrow and entirely focused on making money as the means to achieving the happy and fulfilling life that I was after.

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  50. So, it's a private equity fund in the Bay Area. It was a spin out from a now much larger firm called Golden Gate Capital. Incredible group of people, small group. They were just starting to hire at the analyst level when I was getting done with school. So, you know, I was originally planning to go join an investment bank or go join McKinsey and try to basically do the two years prior and then go to business school and then go join a private equity fund or a hedge fund after really with the thesis that like that's the path that I see successful and rich people following. So let me do that. I'm going to do the two years of Goldman Sachs or McKinsey. I'll do the business school and then I'll try to find a fund. And I met the team at Altamont and they were hiring at the analyst level and it just seemed like a screaming opportunity to go join straight out of school and have the opportunity to really drink from a fire hose, learn in an environment where you are having to learn on the fly path that you know nothing about.

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