YouSaid · the spoken record

Thema Bryant

lines on the record: 48
first: 2025-02-25
most recent: 2025-02-25
sittings or episodes: 1
sources: podcast

Every line below is reproduced as it was said and linked to the record it came from. Nothing here is summarised or generated. Directory · Search · Corrections

“For me, yeah, yes. So live from a soulful, authentic, true place, and in a way that it is regenerative, right? That you are fed even as you pour.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“When you talk about doing all these interviews, for some people, that sounds like, oh my gosh, you have to talk to people all day. And you're like, that's my life.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And so, where's your fruit, right? If I'm living rooted and grounded in the truth of who I am and that fruit is not a fruit that drains me or depletes me, when I'm living my path, that actually renews me and restores me. And so that's the gift of it for me. And my fruitfulness and my soulful living won't look like somebody else's. It's like I meet some people and they say, oh my goodness, you're a trauma survivor and a trauma psychologist. That must be so draining. And I say, no, this work leaves me in awe. Like I'm inspired to be able to walk with people through that like healing process. But for somebody else, it would be draining. Some people who work in a corporate space, they get fed by it because they're called to it. Other people are like, I couldn't do that work, right?”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yes. So for matters of the heart, I have to connect it to my first book, which is Homecoming, because living for me a well-nourished life is being at home with yourself. Being rooted and grounded from the truth of you. And my dear friend and colleague, Dr. Shelly Horell describes it as soulfulness. If I live from a soulful, authentic place, then I am fully alive and being fully alive and showing up means that I have love for myself, that I have love for other people, that I let that guide the ways in which I show up. And I also, there is fruit to my soulfulness. When I am living from an authentic place, there is impact in the world around me.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“That's right. We have to be intentional so that we don't take relationships for granted or take people for granted. Sometimes we're like, oh, I know those are my folks, but we turn to them more when we're in crisis or in need or we neglect the relationship because we figure they'll always be there. So we have to be intentional about engaging and creating moments and memories with each other that are joy filled. have to do that on purpose and protect time for it.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Enough, I have to keep proving I'm a good person. And so now, you know, you get to say yes to yourself, you get to say yes to your relationships, you get to say yes to the young children, the girls you have taken in. But it starts with the nourishment of your own soul. So I want to invite you to start doing morning rituals where you feed your spirit before you start the day so that you do not go through the day running on empty. Feed you first.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Because we're made to feel guilty for our no. We're made to feel guilty that like you have to say yes to everyone and everything to be sufficient, to be a good person. That's what you said. How much is enough?”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yes, absolutely. So, Juan, you talked about blessed to be a blessing, which is beautiful. And I want to ask, are you a person of faith? Okay, I want to say to you that God or your Creator did not make you just to be an instrument for other people's relief. You are not just a vehicle for other people. And I know we like to talk about, God, use me up. God says I'm not a user. I'm not here to use you just to bless others. It's actually to flow into you can get from your overflow. When you are nourished, then it won't drain you or empty you to share with those girls in the home that you share with. For too long we are made to believe that we must say yes to everything. And that's the Christian thing to do. And I want to tell you and Oprah on today.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Right, what you all could actually be so you get to redefine it. Now, I will do some predictions for you when you step back. Some people will step up. Some people who always said, well, she'll handle it, she'll pay for it, she'll do it. Some people will step up. And then sometimes actually won't get done and you let it fall to the ground. Some people are so dependent on you that when you say, I'm not doing it anymore, some stuff will drop and that's okay.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“You feel that way because there was not someone to fill in the gap and you filled in the gap, but you get to resign from being the mother sister. You resign. You turn in your resignation. And now you will be solely the sister. And when we change and when we heal, some people don't like it. When people have been depending on you. They will not appreciate the boundaries. They will not appreciate the no, but it is not for their benefit or for yours for you to continue to carry people who it's time that they learn the strength of their own legs and the strength of their own wings. Nothing you do will be enough for people who see you as their resource and don't see you as their sister. So you decide.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So at first, when I came here, I was urgently, urgently on this job hunt. And I always say to people, if I knew then what I know now, I would have enjoyed the break. Because I was like, just slow down and enjoy it, you know, you're going to find it. So that was hard because it was the first time in my life where I didn't have an affiliation, an institution. And so then, okay, without that, just who are you? And so having to come to terms with that.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“That's right And so then your armor becomes like your resume, right? She got the degree, she got the position. And so now you're saying if I lay down my armor, like how will I know I'm enough? Right. How will I know I'm worthy if you like strip these titles for me? You know, it's like the first time I moved, when I first moved to Los Angeles, I moved here without a position. And before that, I had been like, oh, Duke University, Harvard Medical Center, Princeton University. And so then I came here and it's like, so who are you without all of that? You're enough.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Many people And that's how often we're trained to chase significance. Like if I do enough things, I can outlast the statistics. I can outlast people's assumptions. I can outlast my own fears. Like we're trying to outrun ourselves. Yes.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And it's okay to be afraid. It's okay to not have all the answers. I want to just invite you to do a fill in the blank so you're going to say, I release blank so I can receive blank.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So getting to know yourself, right? And that, this is for the first time in your life that you get to actually discover you and it's not too late. When I talk about returning back to ourselves or healing ourselves, sometimes it's healing myself for the first time. So you're actually not trying to go back to a former self. You've never been this woman that you are creating now, but you get to build her.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yeah, yeah, because everything you've been running from all these years shows up in the stillness, shows up in the silence. So you stay busy. We stay distracted and we think that's whole, right? We think we're here, but you're just distracted and busy. And so now you get to be the nurse to yourself. Yeah, and retrain your nervous system because your nervous system doesn't know how to be settled. And so as you learn to settle, then you'll be able to show up for yourself and for your loved ones. And you are capable and deserving of that. It's just different. So the same way you would be patient with a new nurse is how we have to be patient with ourselves because this thing is new, but it's doable and you and your family deserve that.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“That invisibility, and I'm going to say the relationship that led to the teen pregnancy. Let's just pause there. So, that relationship, and then people's response to you of not seeing you as a capable mother, just ruling you out, eliminating you because of your age that you have been chasing enoughness since then. And that's been many, many years. And so now what has happened is healing and ease feel uncomfortable to you. That's why you think you're bored. That's what ease feels like. It's not boring. Not boring”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Thank you for speaking this truth. And for many of us, achievement is easier than relationship. So, even though you worked hard to get your doctorate, that was actually easier than showing up in that personal space. It's very by the book. I memorized the terms. I apply the terms.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And I want you to know transparency is contagious. So if you meet people and stay very surface about brunch or about shopping, that's where it will stay. But as soon as you deepen it, there are people who will meet you there at the level of your depth. And then they'll say me too, me too. So be open to it. But then as you're connecting with people, let them actually meet you, not a performance.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“It means you're ready to stop fighting it, ready to stop running from it, you're ready to receive it. And so this is your season for that.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“To be validated, to be celebrated, to be appreciated, there are women in your city waiting to sister you. There are women in your city waiting to sister you authentically. And so what happens is our anxiety causes us to isolate and to hide and to block our blessing. And so you affirm to yourself, I will not block the love of a sister that is trying to find me. And I will not have to be perfect for them. You know, with strangers, we have to do public relations. How are you? I'm fine. How are you? I'm blessed. I'm better than blessed. But with my sisters, as you said, I can unfold and say, you know what? I'm tired. You know what I'm confused. You know what I'm fed up. And so that is what your soul desires. So I'm so glad by you questioning it. It means you're ready.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Thank you for the question. And the first thing I want to speak to is the younger version of you. And that part of you who has been disappointed, the part of you that was not chosen, the part of you that was not embraced, the part of you that has never been sistered, the part of you that Mrs. being mothered, the part of you that feels you have to be perfect, and that people will abandon you or leave you or reject you if you are not perfect. And I want to say to you that that is a lie, that you are worthy of friendship, that you are worthy of sisterhood, and that real sisters do not require your perfection and they will meet you where you are. And so instead of hiding or being afraid to consider what it will mean to be known, to be seen, to be heard,”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Like, if only this, if only that, if only these five things, you would be my dream person. And so we have to look at the truth of who this person is. And do I really want the truth of that?”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So it can disrupt your life of how you thought your life was going to be. You know, you imagined a future with this person and felt secure in that. And so a part of it is what you think about not only in terms of the other person, but your picture of yourself. And so one of the things I like to shift for people is not thinking about the ending of all relationships as a failure. Some people are like, oh, it failed. Sometimes leaving a relationship is a success.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“so that you don't end up with the lie of I'm worthy, I'm not attractive enough, I'm not interested enough, all of the lies of not enoughness.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And a part of our healing community is so important. And so that's one of the things I love about you and Gail sharing her journey of what a difference it made for you to show up as sister. As both truth teller, but also with that compassion, because when we're in those moments, we need to be reminded who we are and reminded of our worth. And so what better people to do that than people who genuinely care about you?”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“While part of our healing happens individually, like by ourselves, and part of it happens in therapy, a part of your heart's healing will only take place actually in healthy, loving relationship. That's when you will really grasp some of the triggers to learn how to show up and not run, it's going to happen in that process. And so giving yourself the patience and permission. To try again, to not let the X rob you of the realities of love.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“We desire, yeah, we desire the control. And let me say the part of you that was immediately like, I don't want relationships again is actually a healthy part. It's good to be still after a breakup. Sometimes people jump right out there and they go pick a new person, different name, different face, same personality, same cycle. So it's an indication of healthiness to pause, and then it's an indication that you've started healing when a part of you now desires relationship again, right? Because before you didn't want it. Now you're like, maybe it would be nice. So that's your heart starting to open back up again. And to not sabotage it. I know you talk about running, especially if you feel moved by them, because it doesn't feel safe.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Right, that it's not actually you miss them, it's you missed your idea of who you thought they were. Right And then when we talk about the aftermath, sometimes we create a story about why it happened because we want things to make sense. And so in your story creation of why it happened, you may be looking at yourself or blaming yourself or shaming yourself when the truth of it really may have nothing to do with you. It may be that he had or he or she had access. It may be just for fun. It may be that they were socialized to never be faithful and have not been faithful their whole lives. And so sometimes we try to, it's an illusion of control. If I figure out what I did wrong and I do it different this time, I'll be safe. And so I invite you to release yourself from the lie that you could have made it be different.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Thank you so much for your transparency and for sharing your heartbreak. The first thing I want to say to you is you are not actually grieving the relationship. You're grieving your idea of what you thought the relationship would be. Because in reality, he was not who you thought he was. And so the relationship is not actually one that was mutually nourishing, mutually respectful, mutually edifying. And so that clarification.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“What they actually need, and I want to also say for us to have compassion means when I get it wrong or when I fall off the track, I don't say, well, now it doesn't matter. Like everything is ruined. Is I start again. I begin again.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Right. And so for us to be true in our prayers, and I'm going to say even for meditation, and some people say, oh, I don't know if meditation is against my religion. Being still? For us to tune into our breath and into our bodies, and then our food affects our mood. And so what do I nourish myself? And I like to say, I'm eating this because I love myself.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I don't have anything else to have. And then it shows up in our minds, in our mental health. So you mentioned prayer and our spiritual practice is important and it has to come from an authentic place. Sometimes we're doing public relations in our prayers, like these and thou's, and we want it to sound holy. But in order for it to be effective, it has to be honest.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yes. So we get sick and we know one of the things the research shows is the way our autoimmune disorders and systems for women when we suppress our anger. We suppress our feeling. We neglect ourselves and it shows up in the body. And so then now you have to be still. Now you have to be still. I know.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Right? I have to do a million things. And the reality is that if we don't stop ourselves, our bodies or minds will stop us. And that's what we see happen time and time again.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yes, yes. So one of the things that we pour in is rest and stillness. And many of us don't know how to be still. And we will say to ourselves, I don't have time to be still.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So then people say, You have a bad attitude. No, she's in despair. But if I am harsh, if I am hardworking, if I'm a workaholic, if I'm a perfectionist, if I'm busy all the time, other people will celebrate that, but I'm empty on the inside So it becomes not valuing myself because everybody else is saying good job. But when I lay myself down at night, then what do I say and what do I feel? And I choose to pour into myself so that it can actually be well.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Right. What I say to that is your current way of living is unsustainable. And so we self-destruct. And even when we say, I don't have time to heal, even we'll say, I'm too busy to be depressed. Well, depression will catch you no matter how busy you are. And so what it becomes is it's necessary for us to train our eyes to see the ways that it's showing up. So it might not look like, so for example, with black women, sometimes our despair shows up as irritability.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yeah, a big part of it is self-acceptance and recognizing you can feel more than one thing at the same time and you can be more than one thing at the same time. Sometimes we don't give ourselves grace because we have this idea. So I can have compassion on myself. I say if you look far enough back at your story, your dips and dives and falls make sense. Sometimes we don't look at ourselves in context. So we're like, why did I do that? Or I'm so stupid or what's wrong with me? But if you tell me the fullness of your story, where you landed made sense.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yes, yes. We have so many layers and parts of ourselves that we discard or that we hide because we desire to be acceptable. So it's like, what part of me did I tuck away in order for other people to give validation or approval? Yes. And so gathering those broken pieces so I can be wholly me.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Right, which is another heartbreak, but I love what you shared in a prior episode of they never leave us. And I definitely feel her presence today, every day when I should feel either.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And so that was like a disruption. I'll say before that I was a straight A student. And for the first time, like I couldn't focus. I couldn't concentrate. I had to go speak to a dean. And there was one black dean at Duke University who had the same last name, Dean Bryant. And I just came to her in all of my despair and had to heal my heart. So this has been a long journey up until this year, this past year, the passing of my mother.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Heartbreak, it is that break of trust when you think you're safe in someone's presence. Absolutely. Or we assume, you know, if you're in a faith community, everyone is going to be caring and loving.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“My people, it was everything for me. It is everything. Community is so important for us healing. And so that was a part of talk about like the broken heart. When I was a college student at Duke University, I came home to Baltimore for a visit and a member of our church sexually assaulted me. Talk about heartbreak”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And then see you at church, which is such a great example for us to know what's possible. That this reflection is more than attainable”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“That caused us to not see our own beauty. And so to be brokenhearted as a chocolate girl in Baltimore, to not be able to see the full glory of who I am. And so I had to heal my sense of myself because of all of the messages that bombard us very early to say that we're not enough. And then moving further along while I was in high school, my father was elected to be a bishop in the AME church. We moved to Can I just”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“First of all, I want to say thank you, Oprah, for having me. This is so wonderful and something I have been looking forward to being able to share this work with the public because many of us are walking around with broken hearts. And I like to say my understanding of healing my heart is not just from doctoral studies or reading books, but having lived it so to know firsthand that it's possible to heal our hearts. The first way I would say my heart was broken is something I know you can relate to the realities of racism and sexism.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“For too long, we are made to believe that we must say yes to everything. And I want to tell you the holiness of no. No is a sacred word.”
2025-02-25 · The Oprah Podcast · Oprah and Dr. Thema Bryant on How You Are Worthy of the Life You Want · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT