YouSaid · the spoken record

Todd Herman

lines on the record: 111
first: 2023-11-28
most recent: 2023-11-28
sittings or episodes: 1
sources: podcast

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“For my kids to feel a part of. In New York City, for a short time while I was moving between offices, I had my office at home. It was in the corner of our master bedroom, like any good New Yorker. You're making your space to a lot of duty for you. I'll be doing like videos like this. I was doing trainings and stuff. And so I had this pop-up black photography canvas that would go up behind me. And my challenge was that I had two little girls at the time, you know, now they're 10 and 9, but back then they were like three and two. And they just wanted to be in there with dad. I got them to come in and help me set up my day.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Just going to say, like, I got very, this is where luck comes in. I think I got very lucky growing up on such a big farm. Because if you think about farm life, farm life is a rare place where you work and you live. A place that has no boundaries. That's just the way of life for you. I knew that I was going to be probably in some sort of knowledge work when I was going through my 20s. And I just thought about how could I make a farm.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“But when you're parenting, the feedback loop is 18 years plus. And did you produce a really great, well-rounded, competent adult that is self-driven and all these things? And that was Mitt Romney, who came in and shared that with Clayton's group. And that always stuck with me. And I heard Clayton share that speech kind of long before it went kind of viral online. So to your point or to the point we're talking about is the feedback loops for a lot of high achievers are so much quicker in your domain of career and they're a lot longer in other areas like health even or family or your marriage and relationship. It's typically not just all of a sudden you were an asshole on Thursday and the husband or the wife leaves you. It's like it was a long time coming.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“A gentleman who came in and he would talk about their careers. And he said, you know, a lot of you are going to come back a decade from now and you're going to have a lot of very successful careers. It's just the nature of who comes out of this program, but you're going to find that some of your classmates have got children that are being raised by other men or other women. And now I don't think any of them planned that. They didn't leave Harvard and say, I want my kids to be raised by someone else when I do have kids. But they didn't also work on their family life. And the reason is because In business, it's so easy for us to work another hour, work on another project in your day or at night because the feedback loops are so quick. I put in work now. I'm going to see your result tomorrow or next week or something like that.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“You ever get a chance to meet and talk to Clayton Christensen? Okay, so he was another mentor of mine. Clayton has a great story that he tells. Regarding being in the MBA program at Harvard when he was in the 1970s. I don't know if you've heard this before. So he is a part of this Mormon group that was there. And what they would do is they'd bring in former Harvard alumni that had had success and come in and just speak to their group. And he talks about in a very eloquent video online.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Say all that because coming back to it, I've had to battle that judgment of average when it comes to professional or career lens maybe. But then I see these people crushing it as being a dad or a mom. In their personal hobbies and things like that. And maybe that's where I was under indexing as well.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And we were having these conversations to make ourselves, well, maybe not to make, he didn't even need to make himself feel good, but for me, maybe make himself feel good about judging people who were average. And I said, oh, isn't it funny? Because I don't see you putting in the same energy towards your family. Kobe took that and ran with it then. That was the good part of the short relationship that we did have was, and I always have this with clients, is You're working with really big egos or super egos that happen in the legendary status of athletes. I need to come in and break the exterior of that a lot of times. And so I can't kowtow to them, which is what often happens with the people that are around them.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“During the time of him going through the allegations of sexual assault in Colorado, that's why we built the Black Mamba from was in that moment because he felt like he was losing his edge. And then he got connected to me through my mentor, Harvey. He originally reached out from a friend of his in pro sport, connected him to Harvey, and then Harvey said, oh, you're going through an ego death. You're not losing your edge. You're going through an ego death, Kobe. You need to talk to a guy that is now very much indexing performance towards what I call at the time identity-based performance. Like I help you build the identity to go and win. And then the tool I would use would be the ultra ego tool. Back then, I kind of called it character crafting. After we had developed the relationship,”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Well, on our relationship, that was one of the things that, well, I wouldn't say it fractured it, but we didn't speak for a long time because I challenged him on the same level of energy of excellence in being a father. Because we came together.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“There's many reasons why someone might be getting average results from my own experience of going through some difficult things in my life. I would hate to treat someone and make them feel like I'm so much better than you because look at what I've done.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“We could have a long conversation about this, Shane. So I'm going to be vulnerable for people. I think I struggle with this. Kobe and I would talk about this when I was, you know, building the black mambo with him. And he often said he just had no way of relating to people who just didn't want to be par excellence, like just the best at their thing. He had a hard time relating to them. And I would say I was similar. But then after I matured. And I still have to watch myself, Shane, because it is such an ego response to make myself probably feel good about myself, to judge someone else because they're not getting some sort of result or I perceive them as being average.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“That tells me that pressure is very elastic. So the commentators who are saying that this is high pressure, I've found that most of those people were middle of the road performers when they played their sport. And they dealt with pressure, not like the people that are elite or legends. So there's a different door that you can walk through.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So that you can get into the moment, get out of your ego, and trust all of these things aligning for you, your prep, your plan, and then now you're just the vehicle and the vessel to deliver those two things in the moment. And so is it let go, which is an often one, is it let go and let God? Is it watch this mom? Whatever it is that's going to help to alleviate any tension or pressure that's always built up, pressure is not real. Pressure is only delivered by the human itself. Someone says this is a high pressure game. I don't let my clients and athletes think that way because I don't know that that's true. Truth is gravity. You experience gravity, I experience gravity. But pressure, some athletes deal with it differently than other people deal with it.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“It's a watch me, which is now bringing you into the moment. So, do you trust the plan that you have or the plans that you have to adjust? That's flexibility and adaptability. That's mental toughness. Your ability to be flexible and adaptable despite what you're getting as the circumstance that you're dealt with. That's mental toughness. So now we come to the moment. If you trust those two things Than the likelihood that you're going to trust yourself, which is different. It's going to build confidence. It's going to build certainty that you've got this. And then we work out what's your phrase, Shane. What's the thing you're going to say to yourself?”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I've built up trust in your preparation. Then it gets to the future. Do you trust the future? The future is your plan. You trust your plan the way that you're going to go down those gates? Do you have multiple plans? Because, oh, today you're in the 18th slot. You're not in the first or second slot. It's going to be a little sloppy going around those things, right? Or the wind kicked up for you. And it didn't kick up for the persons that went before you. And now what are you going to do with that? I hope it's a so what?”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“In that moment, that's the present moment. I want to do everything I possibly can to help that person in that moment trust themselves. What is the equation of trust in that moment? Well, past tense, that's where all of your preparation comes in. Did you show up? Did you do the work? You know, have you put in the reps? Did you prepare yourself on not only the days where it was a little bit overcast so that it wasn't too sunny and it was not slushy or it wasn't icy? Did you only ever practice with being the first person to take the run around the freshly groomed slope? Or did you also practice being the 26th person to go around those gates with tracks already grooved in, things starting to get a little bit slushy and a little bit icy where your skis start to slip a little bit? Have you practiced the slipping of the edges of your? If you have and all those things are an affirmative, great.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“The compounding effect because the compounding effect delivers confidence because there's a lot of guys who don't pull the trigger on that shot. He was covered by the defenseman very well. The goalie was in the perfect position for him. There's nothing about that situation that says he should have taken that shot, but he did. And that comes to ultimately everything I ever try to help someone with shame. At the end of the day, Shane, I want you to trust yourself. Trust is different than confidence. It's at the DNA level. When you feel like you trust yourself, That's when time is collapsing. Think about an alpine skier who's standing at the top of a mountain. That looks like it's a vertical cliff and it's in the Olympics. It comes once every four years. So here they are skis standing in the gate, getting ready to go down this vertical face.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Shane, an example with that. An NHL client was in the Stanley Cup playoffs and it was game one, very tightly contested first game. And it did come down to overtime. He hopped off the bench, got on the ice, accepted a pass coming over the other team's blue line. And he snapped a one in a million shot over the left-hand corner. So he's coming down the right wing, snapped it over the left-hand shoulder of the goalie who was absolutely stellar that game. And Fit hit the puck in between a window the size of a puck. And so everyone's like, you know, one in a million shot. Look at it. No, Ryan practiced that shot thousands of times. That exact spot on the ice. And I get chills just thinking what, like, the amount of effort that you're putting in to maybe one day in a high pressure. Situation be able to deliver that shot, that's compounding.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Been just a nice word. It could have been just a smile. Like anything that it just embeds in us in that moment in time. And that's how I think about what I call it citizen Todd. We'll talk about identity in a bit. But that's another very important identity that I have that I take out into the world. Living in New York City, there's a lot of people who they put on their headphones and they think that because they have their headphones on, the world doesn't exist, right? Well, that's a pretty terrible way to show up and be a contributor in society, I think. So I think I've got a responsibility as citizen Todd when I go out there to, you know, who knows if today is the day that I give someone a moment that shapes and shifts them and puts them back on course or does evolve into some sort of long term. It's a long-term relationship because we do. Whether we like it or not.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Shane, like that's, and that's a fantastic example of taking a look at two people who are literally doing the same. Whether it's a knowledge worker who's trying to grow themselves on LinkedIn, they're doing the exact same thing. They're posting things the same way. We've indexed so much towards habit and behavior so much recently. And I appreciate all the talk about habits, but there's another side of this whole performance world that isn't as appreciated, which is the way you're going about it. And so in that moment, that's a perfect example of the way your frame of mind is a part of the way that you're going about it. Now, that way of going about it is like, hey, I'm going to have a long-term relationship with this person, whether they know it or not, right? And a long-term relationship could be, it might be just one interaction. But we've all had those moments in life where someone came along at the right time for us and just really treated us like a human being. They saw something in the moment with us.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“In his 20s, he resolved to live his life in decades. And he said, my 20s is going to be about mastering the craft of comedy. And then my 30s, he got there and he's like, well, now because of these opportunities that I have, I'm going to master the craft of acting. In his 40s, he's like, I'm going to start mastering the craft of music, specifically the banjo for him. And then his 50s has been about mastering the craft of painting. He's an amazing painter. This long view of things could really help people not feel so rushed in, I got to do this project right now. It's like, well, we're working with a decade here, man. So Shane Parrish is working on his next decade of becoming absolutely world-class at interviewing. Now all of a sudden you don't go and buy.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I got a camera when I was young, and I fell in love with directing and making films. And so it's a terrible narrative for you to constantly be battered with is these people who found their things super early in life because then you lament the fact that you didn't, or what didn't I see when I was younger? And then you beat yourself up and you're like, oh, maybe I was supposed to be a caricaturist. Why not? Because I did like drawing when I was. And then you question yourself and you doubt yourself. And it's like there's so many different ways that people found their thing. And I say this specifically because I love what Steve Martin had created as a frame for his life.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“The reason I read them is because in the nuance and the grout of those books, you hear very much a similar story. I grew up in a place. I was like kind of a bit of a fish of water. It wasn't the best place for someone like me. Maybe I didn't have the right parents. Sometimes they did have the right parents. Those parents opened them up to a world that other kids never got an opportunity. But I felt like as a bit of a maybe a fraud or I couldn't do what my parents did or I wish I could go and be like so-and-so. And it's this pathway of a lot of times people not pursuing the thing that they most wanted to do. Instead, what we hear frequently is the Steven Spielberg stories.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“These other things that you can work on that get you traction in the short term. So knowledge workers, one of their biggest challenges is absolutely not trying to do too much, not trying to add so many projects onto their plate. And I think of, now Shane, I don't know, do you read many autobiographies by chance?”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And then they wonder why they're buried under a weight of stress and overwhelm. And then ultimately they get burned out happens in entrepreneurship a lot, happens in knowledge work a lot. And that's because your ambition got in the way, which then comes down to a really poor decision making process of like, what is the most important, most valuable, highest impact thing that I could be working on right now? And your answer to that, If you're super impatient, you're typically going to be looking for dopamine hits of things that are immediate feedback loops as opposed to long term. It's great to have this balance of like, I'm working on this really long-term thing that its return on investment or its return on my skills is going to be just orders of magnitude huge or return on meaning to me. And then there's.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Well, it's undeniable that that's a major part of that process of being more valuable. Because we were talking before about success. And I don't like that term. I think in the terms of being useful and being valuable. More useful you are, the more valuable you are, then whatever success is going to happen is going to happen, I think. But when I'm working with people, we subtract, we remove, and we delete so that I can get you into what I call the flow channel. Highly ambitious people, typically the main lever that they pull in their life is the lever of more.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Are you trying to posture this perfect persona of every single poem that you write is going to be the next raven? Or well, then you've just created a paradigm and a set of rules around yourself that's going to be really hard to win inside of. And so that's what I've often found is people have rules about what success is going to mean, which then causes them to feel like they might be found out. And I would just say, let's pull yourself right back into the process. That's why I like to index towards career. There's going to be a lot of stuff over my career that I'm going to put out or I'm going to create that just doesn't hit the mark. Here's my response. So what?”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Now, that kind of diverges into two roads. If you're someone who's posturing and positing a sense of skill sets and competencies that are not rooted in truth whatsoever, then here's the reality. You should be found out. But for those that feel like they're going to be found out, I just tell them the same thing. Stack your chips, go back.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Stack the confidence chips, play at the poker table of life with your actual chips that you've earned over time. So that's one thing. So we discounts. The second thing that imposter phenomenon is actually about is the fear and the concern or the worry of that people are going to find you out that you're not as good as they think that you are.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And stressing about it, losing sleep over it. And he has this journal that he keeps on his desk. And he broke down his entire life into three-year increments from zero to two and three to five and six and on and on and on. And what he did was he cataloged all the things that he learned and all the skills that he developed and knowledge he gained and wisdom he'd gained throughout that all these periods of his life. And he would pick it up and he'd flip through it. And the reason he'd flip through it was because. At the end of flipping through it, he would always come to the conclusion, oh, no matter what gets thrown my way, I'll figure it out. Look at, I've just proven that over time. So I say that because to that person who discounts themselves like they do with who am I to go after that?”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And so I keep this on my desk, Shane. So people are listening. I have a little glass jar and it has a whole bunch of poker chips inside of it. We need to do a really good job of owning our wins, owning the skills that we've developed, owning the circumstances and situations that we've pulled ourselves out of that might have caused other people to turn back and not enter the cave, so to speak, to use Joseph Campbell's words. Own those things. And there's a great story from the former CEO of Levi's where when they were going into China, he was very concerned that it wasn't going to be successful.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yeah, and you dismiss it, basically, right? And that's very toxic to your overall level of confidence and level of self-efficacy, your belief in your ability to go and make things happen. That's what self-efficacy really means. And so to those people, I always give them the same piece of advice. What you've done is you're sitting at the poker table of life. And you've robbed yourself of your chips.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Well, some of that was because people were now posturing with veneers of their lives online. There was now filters to our photos to make ourselves look better or be more stylish. And then you have the rise of influencers who now have these easily accessed platforms to talk to people about subject matter. They have no expertise in whatsoever. They have no nuance of understanding around it whatsoever. So imposter syndrome, I think, has become a catch-all term for all of the mental maladies of human beings and it's crap to me. Really, it only is three things. One, Imposter syndrome is or imposter phenomenon would be that you have sort of given up all of your successes in life, your achievements to lock right place, right time nowadays it's privilege and a bunch of different like terms now.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I have a really hard time with that phrase, Shane. It basically was non-existent in the 2000s. Imposter syndrome is a new term anyway. It's actual root where it came from was two ladies in Texas in the 1970s. And it was actually called imposter phenomenon. And what it was there to explain was in this new world of work where women were both coming into and building careers for themselves and they were also still holding that main role of being caretaker at home. They felt like they were kind of being imposters in both. Like they weren't good at either of them. And then in 2010 when Instagram came around, you can see it literally in Google's search algorithm. Imposter syndrome starts to take off.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Believe in yourself enough to surround yourself with the best. Really find people who are at the very top and tuck yourself under their wing. And that has been made all the difference for me. So now going back to those clients of mine, those athletes, they had, whether it's one person or they had three people or they had a team around them, and especially when they're more into the pro ranks nowadays. They had at least one great coach who could really help them with the technical side of their sport along the way.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Know it's obvious you're not going to be moving back to the farm and ranch, you're not going to become a farmer. Hopefully mom and I have given you some like really great foundational like character integrity stuff that's not going to fail you. But you're going to go and do things that we're probably not going to give you very good advice on. So my only advice to you would be like whatever you go and do.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And so I grew up in a big farm and ranch in Alberta, Canada. I told her brothers. And so, you know, typically when there was a three-boy job to go and do, it typically meant that it was hard labor in my older brothers loved to make me do the crappiest part of it. So I didn't develop the affinity towards it that they did. Now I'm getting ready to go off to college university and I was working for my dad in the Corrals with some cattle. And we stopped just to take a quick break. He's a man of air few words, but he said, Todd,”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And that's not me stealing competency from myself. It's actually, for me, it's very empowering because I'm like, how can I engineer more of that? Because there are just many fun happenstances that happen for me. But that was also because I was taking action, but I'm looking for more luck. But in the environment getting to what also shaped the athlete, it would be definitely the quality and the excellence of the coaching. And the talent that they had around them.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And so it's that kind of sweet spot of size. Now, that's inside of now a culture that would maybe valuing that type of sports. So in Canada, hockey, quarter of a million person city, you're going to get good coaching. But if in Canada you were trying to play and become very good at rugby, Maybe not. There's that side of things. There's many factors outside of ourselves because we want to index towards me, like what made me do this. And I like to tell people like, I think about 33% of my whatever successes and outcomes I've had in my life, I'm going to index towards luck.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Well, one that can't be ignored is the luck of where they were born. It just can't be underestimated how critical that is to the success factor of someone. So these are choices that they didn't even make. It was just they got lucky being where they are. So statistically speaking, the best size of city or town to live in to develop your sporting skill set is around a quarter of a million people. Because at a quarter of a million people, the level of competition can be well above average. The quality of coaches that you could get now increases over that of $100,000 city.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Three months ago, six months ago, if you're a person that is challenging yourself, it's going to change that vision. It might crystallize it better, create better clarity. You're going to figure out what you don't want.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Think about this too, Shane, to your great point about courage for the outcome. It's also very egoic for you and I to even think that we even know what the outcome is going to be in the future anyway. Like don't forget the things that you're wanting right now are coming from your current level of identity and how you view and see yourself. But the more that you push yourself into challenging situations, you do tough stuff. You pick up hard things. You have hard conversations with people. That's changing your level of ability, which is going to change how you view and see yourself. And because the way that you view and see yourself is different, it's going to open up different ideas around what it is that you want. And so now your vision is constantly changing as you're evolving and iterating. And so like what you think you wanted.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Just have, I have a fundamental belief, Shane, that I'm going to figure things out and that I'm going to stumble. I'm going to fall. But I also know I have the capacity to pick myself up and continue marching forward. And the reason I know that and the reason that everyone that's here listening to this right now knows that is you're here. That's how I know that you have the capacity to pick yourself up because you're here because everybody gets knocked down. I just want sure to get knocked down pursuing the things that I want to go and pursue.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And then the fear of uncertainty is another thing. Will I lose the money if I invested it this way into my business? And will I lose my time? And oh, geez, what else am I going to be missing out on if I actually stay committed to this one thing and become very myopic in trying to channel my energies towards that? And I always try to like to flip that with people and say that you have no idea the version of you that's waiting for you on the other side of being committed because the side of you that you're going to meet that only stays in the area of interest is going to be the very same version of you that you're experiencing right now. But the person that becomes committed, it's a forcing function on your skills. It's a forcing function on your traits and your attributes that you've already developed. And if you take with yourself a very curious mind of, no, like if you.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“One is cultural. Definitely cultural influences from whether it's your childhood. I'm not a therapist. I don't do that kind of work with people. ideas that people have about what the taking action is going to mean or the negative responses that they had when they were younger that really created a strong narrative about how bad it is to go and take action on something. Again, it's the fear of losing the hope because if I always live in inaction, but I still have my hope of like doing it, I'm not going to lose that, that warm feeling that I have about daydreaming about that thing. And I'm not confronted with the realities.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yeah, great question. It would play a part. It would play a part. And then some of those other things that get in the way there between interest and commitment or the things that you had brought up earlier, you know, whether it's the fear of rejection, the fear of losing face somehow, the fear of testing your skills because we think we're kind of good at something. And maybe we're not. I'll give you an example. Well, I'm trying to scale a software company with two co-founders for people in the coaching space. I love putting myself back into that, what I call the field of play constantly because I want to test myself. Okay. Todd, you can give this advice very good to other people. But how good are you at following product market fit methodology? How good are you at defining a specific target market to get traction inside of and sticking with it? So for me, going back to that whole like that fear of not taking action.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“An actor in Hollywood. And that's always just a dream in my mind. But I never take action on it. It's actually a place of safety and security because the moment I take action on it, I no longer have that warm blanket of hope that someday maybe I'll be able to go and do it. And I think that many people. Stay stuck where they are, not pursuing the things that they really want to do because of hope.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“People really don't sit down and be really honest with themselves about what it is that they truly want to be doing. And one of the reasons that they don't is because if you Shane were to You're losing the excuse of hope. I think hope is a double-edged sword like everything in nature. Something can't only be good. Nature tells us that that doesn't work hyperhydrosis and hypohydrosis water isn't always good when you and I are floating in the middle of the ocean the last thing I want is more water unless it's rainwater to help me fuel my body and hope is the same way hope can't only be good because if I'm hoping that maybe someday I'm going to be uh”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Well, from my experience, one of the major things that causes that, Shane, is the lack of admitting to yourself what it is that you actually want. So many people that have come to me. And they feel stuck, or they feel maybe they built a business that has trapped them in some way. And they're trying to figure it out. And they're kind of delaying on taking some of the actions that they know they should be doing. I'll just ask them, did you accidentally build this business? We make these assumptions that we sat down and we said, I'm going to build that business right there. And it was such a smart intention. I'm an accidental entrepreneur. A lot of people, I think, have gotten themselves through just great action into a corner, but it's not really what they want. I think that the reason that many people would levels of dissatisfaction or they aren't maybe taking the inspired action that they're supposed to be taking is because it's not what they actually want. And they know that. And I think most people.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I would actually change that and say it's not their ability to not get bored. It's for them to attack the boring things with an intention of understanding that that's what will separate them from everybody else. I see even in the world of business, you know, especially nowadays where everything is a highlight reel on Instagram or Twitter or LinkedIn. And that is just not the case. There's so much of the work that we all do behind the scenes. Like if you want to win, you've got to know how to execute. And it's in the execution that so many people break. They just don't want to do the things. Everyone wants the noun without the verb. They want the best-selling book, but they don't want to do the work of writing for them. Best selling book because it's a painful process as someone who's written it. It challenged me.”
2023-11-28 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Todd Herman: Unleashing Your Secret Identity · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT