YouSaid · the spoken record

Blake Eastman

lines on the record: 148
first: 2024-01-09
most recent: 2024-01-09
sittings or episodes: 1
sources: podcast

Every line below is reproduced as it was said and linked to the record it came from. Nothing here is summarised or generated. Directory · Search · Corrections

“I mean, I walked in here and I was like, just as a default approach, they were on loading gear. And I was like, hey, do you need help? And I picked up a stand and brought it in. Like it just, because I know what it's like to carry all these damn stands down the block. It's just putting others first. It can change your life and change what you get back. You just can't do it from a place of trying to get something. Like it's super weird if all of a sudden I bring this stand in and I'm like, hey guys, I have a shoot after this. Were you willing to? Because I was like, oh, I see where it's going, right?”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Others and not yourself. So, how can you optimize your behavior for the people around you as opposed to what you're going through? It's a very helpful exercise for people that are in their head. And I think the best communicators and the people that are the most well-liked are consciously doing this. They're putting other people first. And it's just sort of like, oh, reaction or a way of doing it.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So that's one of the interesting things. Like, now I just get really interested. So I see someone on an elevator and there's two people and they're blocking the other side. And I'm just like, you really don't have the concept that other people are. And I don't think people do. I don't think people have that theory of mind that other people are interacting in this world. And it's why it's so infuriating for the people who do have that. But I just don't, like, even on the plane today, somebody was literally holding back yesterday. Everybody is walking on this line and they're trying to get their little luggage out. And they're just, and then their wallet falls and they have to take their wallet out and tuck it into their there's a world happening around you what's going on um that's like my one prompt for everybody listening is like there's a world happening around you and i think it's very healthy just sometimes make your behavior about”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Not aggressive to them. They're fine. In New York City, the way I was raised around my friends, we were brutal to each other, constantly making fun of each other, like insulting people, like left and right. It was part of the cultural construct.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“No, they're so different. The trick is this so I have this thing called anywhere on the planet approach. And the sort of concept is you can be dropped anywhere on the planet and you could observe and you can look at things. So you can look at the proximic differences between a Midwestern interaction versus the Middle East. Middle East people, they talk quicker together, the behavior will be perceived as maybe a little bit more aggressive in the way that I move in this. It's a cultural construct. It's how they interact. It's not aggressive.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Or just get into some sort of story are it still is the single most powerful communication tool, Barn. The problem is people are now in our society going into performance storytelling Which is a lot different than social storytelling. So performance storytelling is that when I was seven years old, something happened that changed the course of my life. And it's kind of like, I find it icky. A real story is just telling a story like you tell your friends, but it has a beginning, it has an end. I find that tell more stories in dating, it will really show you how you connect to someone”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Who the other person is? The best paradigm for dates is storytelling, never questions. Because when you fall into this question and all right, so if we take. If we write a story out, let's say you told me like before we started this, you're telling me a story about your kids, right? And we list that out. There were so many threads of connection between me and you in that story. It would have been impossible for you to do that in a question and answer. So like even when I was dating people, when I was like helping people with dates, I would say start off with story. So as soon as you get in the table, not just like, hey, how are you? It's just like the craziest thing just happened.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And those people connected at a much deeper level. The surface ones, they look because, and then you also see all people's biases. So you see, I show people two people in a date. And like in one, the female is by society standards far more attractive than the male and people immediately don't think that she's interested in him because of that reason. So they just make you projecting all your stuff onto the world around you every single second. And that really showed you.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Everybody's got a song playing, and sometimes you just need to dial the volume up and down. Some people try to play a completely different song. So they try to become someone completely different, to be more of a chameleon for that person. And then after three or four dates, it's just like, this is not really me. You don't want to be too much yourself and too authentic and too straightforward. But it's funny, our first date, my first study ever was on dates. So I rented a restaurant in New York City. This was in 2008 in the subprime mortgage crisis. I put on an ad on Craigslist, $50 to set you up on a 30-minute date. I got like 300 applications. And I set up a series of dates. People came in 30 minute date, and then the guy would leave and I would ask what's going on. And we found that it's so interesting is when you show people these dates, what they perceive to be the best date is not the best date. So the best date is the one that was a little bit more awkward, a little bit weird, but it had more depth to it.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Just because the women I had met weren't interested in this kind of stuff. And I met somebody that was like really interested in self-development. And I was like, I didn't realize how important this is to me. And it was so funny because then it was all these things that are like truly important to me at the time and continue to grow that solidified this sort of relationship. And then there's all the other game type stuff that you got to do. And it's even very difficult to even articulate. I can tell you what not to do. I can tell you try not to be someone you're not. Don't”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And I was like, and she really read that book. And she's like, Oh, I love him. I love his books. And I was just kind of like, huh, like it was this qualifier that was like different. And I was like, yeah, I think I'd like to, I never thought that. I never had the concept that my partner was going to share my interest at that age. Right.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“has attractive girl on the Tim. This is before Tim was like Tim Ferris, right? It was just kind of like four hour body had just came out or four hour work week.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“But I think doing that work of what makes me happy, like what am I looking for in somebody else and not going for the traits of just, I mean, attract an instant quality for the most part, right? You see somebody, you know if they're attractive or you're attracted to them or not. But there's sort of like these deeper things. Like I remember me and my wife met. It was so funny. We met in like 2 years ago. I met she met in my class. I had a class called Body Language Explain. She was in the second class ever. And she walks in and I was like, okay, what do we got here? And during the, she sits down and then during our conversations, this on my bookshelf, she said, you know, you remind me of like, you remind me of like Tim Ferris a little bit, like a New York City Tim Ferris. And I was like,”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I think people have this real weird concept of it's almost like memetic desire. Like there's a desire of what you think you want, but what you actually want. And I feel like the first step in really dating is like, what do you really want? And for a super young, super, somebody's young in their 20s or whatever, you don't know. It's going to take some time to sort of like figure it out.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yeah, dating's a tricky one because dating is this weird game still. Like in the beginning, it's this game of like delayed attraction and delayed gratification. There's so much nuance to it. I'll tell you one thing. I think that, so I used to do this. I used to teach a dating class in New York City. And one of the cool things I would do is I would ask people in the room like, what's their ideal person? And they like write a list on that piece of paper. And then I go, okay, the last three relationships in your life, how many of them met that criteria? And they would all like laugh and it would never be one-to-one. Right.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“But I struggle with the same thing, like video of just like, oh, no, of like how this is going to be perceived or, you know, I'll be more effective at this kind of conversation a year from now. This is my second podcast and God knows how many years. Like those type of things. But do people really care? I think we care more than they do.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Tonight I'd be ecstatic. But if I have to make a video that I know that's going to be out there on it, I overthink, I overanalyze. I mean, there's videos of me saying things because also, I mean, I've changed my own opinions on things. Totally. So like I have videos out there that I made in 2016 about poker tails that over the past eight years, I've completely changed my mind and thoughts about that. videos of me saying things that i completely disagree with today and i oh i yeah i i struggle with the same thing i think i have to go the what's the rick rubin rick rubin has great quote about like a creative process is like you're creating something for the time yeah”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“This is my big problem, too. So I've had to get a lot of personal coaching with my coaches about video. So if I had to give a presentation in Madison Square Garden”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“What is it? And I had everybody like fill out a little form, and they gave it to me. And only one person knew, and guess what? They worked at J. Crew. And they said, You really love our pants. You must have so many. And it was just this moment where I was like, No one cares. No one really cares. And I think we spend so much time on those things and not enough time on connection and not enough time on really like getting the other person, getting out of our own head into what's like actually occurring.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“How people would respond to it. Yeah, I mean, all these weird things. Like, I'm wearing two different socks right now, two different kinds of socks. And I was like, no, maybe I'll cover my sock. And they're like, I don't care about my sock. We do that. Like, we just, we, and we over index these things that other people don't even notice. So when I was teaching psychology at CUNY, I had this, so I was wearing the same J-Crew pants every day because we were really comfortable. And I started like, all right, I'm just wearing the same pants like every single day. And I have like two pants. And I was like, I think people are going to know, but I couldn't find these pants anymore. Yeah. So it was in my head about these pants. And my students looking at my pants. So I was like, you know what? Let me ask. So I basically set up this cool thing where I was like, hey, everyone, like a month into the course, I had like 140 students or whatever. I was like, there's something about me that hasn't really changed.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“There's nothing ever like it. We've got tons of political everything. Everything is so nuanced right now that there isn't, it's not just about your survival, it's about survival and looking good when you post this Instagram post and making sure it doesn't offend this, this, this, this. It's getting more complex, not less. And it's happening quickly. It's like that, you know, hockey shaped curve of just like complexity is driving up.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yeah, people have to be reminded we're so bad as humans of looking at time. But the amount of time we've been around on this planet utilizing exactly what you're talking about is like this. And then the time that we're navigating all these crazy structures is like a teeny, teeny, teeny, teeny, teeny thing. And it plays such unimportant and valuable role in how we function it. My wife owns a sleep optimization company and she's all about circadian rhythms and very anti these lights, right? And what's so fascinating is like if you look, we have had our sleep dictated by the sun in the same way for so long and just over the past like 90 years or 80 years or whatever it's been completely altered That's so, so, so new. And just we are the time that we're going into right now is the most socially complicated.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So I've done this in academic settings where I meet someone that I just, I think they're a little bit full of it. So I just like make up studies. I'm like, have you read that like Dillington study in like 2014? And they're like about that. And then I'll say something. They're like, yeah, I think I've read it. And I'm like, yeah, where they did the double blind. And like, yeah, yeah, it was great. I just made it up. And this is the trick, though. It's not to make a judgment call about that person. So I don't do something like that and go, liar, how can it? But I know that in terms of how they're willing to be seen, they're willing to sacrifice that for being read in on the know, right? And they want to be perceived that way. So it's an interesting sort of character thing. And then there's questions like, you know, do you want your head of business development, your salesperson to respond that way? It gets interesting. But yeah, I think that's the easiest way.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Sort So that's, I think the best way. So on the nonverbal behavior spectrum, dating is probably the easiest paradigm to understand. And deception is the hardest because it's so multifaceted. It's so complex”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“One person that's not just, I have all the answers and trust me, and I'm right, but one person that's able to have the humility and adapt over time.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Little traits of humility of when someone was wrong or how they were wrong or why they were wrong that come up in language and are not prompted. Like it's refreshing to hear an expert say I was really wrong about that. I think this is one thing that Uberman does so well of just being this kind of like Very distinguished professor, tons of research, but has this boyish kind of passion for science and for that. And I think that comes across as that's the new expert.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So It's tricky. It's a tricky one. It's in the sense that I believe that certain people speak with, I was like a lot like this when I was younger. I would talk about things so confidently that I knew nothing about. And my wife really changed my perspective on this when we first started dating. She was like, you have a responsibility with that level of conviction. And I was like, you're 100% right. Like, I definitely. Like, I'm not really sure. So it's like, this is my opinion about this thing, but not like it's absolute fact and nobody else. And I think when you find somebody like that, I like to look for, I don't know. So whenever I talk to any expert and there's always an answer, sometimes it's nice to be like, oh, I don't know. Or there's not always an answer to something, right? They don't always, because I feel like there's a compulsion to always contribute or always to be confident. And the truth is it's just not possible. And then also there's just.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Exactly. No, that's the best way of thinking of it. Like, you know what's going to happen I think there was one cool study, I think, out of like UPen that found that people that talk faster are listened to at a greater level, even though what they're saying is nonsense. It's just not, like, that happens to me every once in a while. Like, I'll listen to somebody and I'll be like, I sounded really good. And then I replay it. And they say the same thing three times. I even catch myself doing that. I was like, I just said that the same thing three times. But I'm passionate about it. So it sounds good. Yes. I mean, that's.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So they have the ability, there's a lot of shifts in their tonality. There's a lot of movement. You kind of can't predict what the next word is going to be. There's, I just think there's something that the brain loves that. It loves the chaos.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And like that stuff's an advantage in life. Like, some people have a face that's going to be more trustworthy or a face that's going to be more aligned with attraction or whatever it is. So I definitely think it's multivariable, right? There's so many different variables. And when they come together, you get that like really gifted communicator that just has that ability. But I will tell you one thing. So one of the big things that I've noticed in the best communicators is they have range.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Like he never broke eye contact Not like a there's also, I think this is all about that perceptual bell curve. So I think there are qualities and tonality, the way the gaze, the shape of someone's face. It's kind of like these whole old ancient practices of like determining if somebody's going to be a criminal or not based on their facial structure. And the interesting thing about that is like our culture supports that. Like William Defoe is usually the villain. Because he's got that really like angular sort of like type of face. Like he was perfectly casted in one of the Spider-Man movies, right? And there's certain things about there's a professor out of UPenn that's does a lot of stuff about impressions and the structure of someone's face.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So, the amount of people that have given me that build, I'm like, and I'm so curious because I've seen some footage of him in interactions, a close friend told me the story once of walking into a He was with him, and they walked into like a conference center, and there was a cleaning lady cleaning. And she got really like, I'm not supposed to be here. And he walked right up to her and he looked at her with a level of presence and focus for two and a half or three minutes that people were like, you know. And part of me is this. It's like, first, there's definitely this halo or this thing of he's the president or former president of the United States, right? But there's also these like nonverbal ways of just the piercing eye contact and the way that he looks deep into your soul. And there's definitely a balance of both. I am so curious though.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Set up cameras. Also, just set it up so that you win. Like, I feel like certain structures and certain environmental, like just the way an office is integrated. Like I had, I had worked for one person a long time ago. They had like a desk and he had a like really large desk and then there was a chair and he would every time somebody came to the office, he would like walk behind his desk, like shake their hand and then bring them to like a couch setup where they were faced one-on-one. And that's before Zoom and before COVID. This is how they did all their one-on-one sessions. And it was just like a simple way of getting sure the person feels really heard because you're just aligned with them. Totally. And you're looking at them and you're facing that direction. I was like, huh, that's a really cool.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I think all optimal behavior is within a construct of your environment. So the more you have context, the more you understand an environment, the more your behavior can be designed or modified to navigate that environment.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“violate every book ever written about leadership and work a team to complete death and play this Machiavellian game of just when they're about to fire just about when they're about to quit give them enough of reinforcement and I see they're like the dark side of everything that I'm teaching and I'm like they know exactly what they're doing here and I call them out and I'm like you know exactly where they're doing it and then you look at their KPIs and their metrics and how the how the organization's structured and they're like they're actually in perfect alignment with how they should be acting It's tricky. It's a tricky thing. And I don't think.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Say thought leaders and leadership and all, I think they're disconnected from what leaders actually go through. And the reason why I'm saying that is like all of this stuff is easy in theory, but I see some of these people, like they're pulled in six different directions. Their board wants them to do this. Their stock is at this. This team is this. And it's so much harder than just like, oh, you know, be a little bit more happy in the morning. And I feel like you really, as like a coach, you have to feel like, you know, what's the 80-20? Like what are the small things that you're going to do that are going to have the greatest impact on the team? And then also, I really just struggle with this in the sense that like I've seen Certain leaders be horrible and get incredible things done.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Let's be real, a lot of people don't want to do that work. Like they're just going to protect themselves from that. And listen, also, I think we have a problem in this kind of like self-help, personal development world where I think a lot of”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So, like, I love these questions where we do all these perception research, right? So you go like this, you say, how do you think that interaction went on a scale from one to 10? People are horrible at answering it. Like, do you like that person from a scale from one to 10? They're like, I don't know. But you ask somebody a question, on a scale from one to five, how likely are you to invite this person to a dinner with your closest friends? And the answer is so easy for them to answer. So I like questions that are about predictive type of things. Not about just your trait because it allows them to conceptualize and give a better answer. So I would be asking questions like, you know, on a scale from like, just tell me, let's go from one to five, how many times do you leave an email from me feeling frustrated? Because they can easily give you the answer instead of searching for it.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So that's probably the best way questions of asking other people. But see, this is where it gets more. And what would we ask them? So this is where it gets interesting, right? So like you have to have a leadership style and a presence and a history of being the kind of person that could sit there and be like, hey, everyone, I'm really trying to improve how I am on emails. So I just want to know, like, when I send you an email, do you have any like weird stories of an email that I sent you that you thought I was a certain way or I was frustrated of a certain way? But a lot of leaders or executives, they can't even create the like space or the dynamic to do that. Most people be like, no, you're fine.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yeah, I mean, I'll take nonverbal as everything. So all of our software analyzes language patterns. It analyzes tonality. And I go into, you can't really separate nonverbal from verbal. Maybe the only place you could do this is poker and a couple of other things. The truth is we're always, so the model for how we read behavior is we're looking at behavior within a context and we're coming up the reason for why it occurs. If you don't have like words, you don't understand the context. That's why like a lot of things, a lot of these body language people take a 10 second clip and be like, you know, because of my feet are sitting this way, that means this or that. And they just like build this narrative. Words allow you to understand the consistency of that narrative. So it's so much better to have the full picture, as much data as possible.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“If you don't have access to video, I would really, if I had to give it that, I would say I want you to record yourself not in a work context, record yourself with someone they have a true unconditional positive regard with, someone that you know is not judging you, that you're a close friend, and I'd like you to look at your tonal patterns, your movement, how you are, that's how you should be at work. That's for sure. 95% of people, and every once in a while there's a certain percentage that's not that, but that's, I think, a good standard to follow.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I say like so much, or I say um, or I say ah, like you're missing the picture of what you're trying to sort of convey. So part of the process is like coming up with almost like a series of words that you'd want to, like, how do you want to come across in this interaction? Well, I want to be enthusiastic. I want to be interested. I want to be to the point. And then making sure that your behaviors are in alignment with that and landing for the people in that way. But a lot of it is like breaking down video and just analyzing video. Like that's the best way by far.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So the exercise of watching other people reacting to you is very valuable in the sense where you'll understand when you're losing people, when people are disinterested, when they're engaged, so on and so forth. But also understanding aspects of you. I believe that most people, you need somebody else to help you with this. People look at the things that don't matter. They'll say,”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Our ability to communicate. I think one step one obviously I've been repeating this over and over and over again is get as much video as possible of you interacting so everyone out there listening to this if you work I promise you you have a good amount of video on zoom on whatever you just basically want to rewatch those videos and make sure that your intent is aligned with that”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And it's like, whoa, whoa. Like, Elon Musk could violate all the norms he wants. Steve Jobs can too. But you can't. You don't have that authority. You don't have that contextual understanding of who you are. So you have to sort of play the game in the beginning. This always comes up with small talk. Like people hate small talk. I hate small talk. Well, small talk is a path to big talk. So you have like a couple seconds, couple minutes of small talk. You don't just walk out this zone and be like, hey, so tell me what's the biggest conflict between you and your wife right now. It's like, what?”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And it is intuitive for some people. And it's right now in this room, there's just this invisible norms. of how I should act on a podcast, how you should be like. And if you don't know those norms, you're sort of like off. And sometimes one of the things that happens is these hyper or really successful people who violate those norms get modeled.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I'm drawing circles of all the layers of context in that dynamic. And he's like, okay, I understand it now. And I was like, it was inappropriate for that dynamic. And I have so much empathy for people that don't see the world that way because it's so, so, so hard.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Harder so it's easier to deal with the people that are more contextual and lower them down than the hyper literal. Becomes like certain people on spectrums and multi-axle spectrums. I sometimes have worked with people that I have to like, yeah, it's basics, basic. And they're like, interesting. So I had a client once that. This is years ago. This is maybe like 14 years ago or 15 years ago in a bar in New York City at 3 o'clock in the morning, not in a bar, I'm sorry, in a diner. He walks into the diner and I was like on a double date. He walks in and he goes, Blake, how are and introduces everyone. Hey, how are you? How are you? How are you? And everybody starts hysterical laughing. And I'm like, good, good. And our session later, I was explaining to him like, this is why the context was different.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“It's all this cool narrative of everybody seeing the world differently, and it's like my job to solve the puzzle of documenting that and bringing them together and show them. Usually, the best out. Like, I really believe that the personal operating manuals that sometimes people, I've seen some people do them that are so good. And just like, listen, here's my quirks, here are my things about me. You get it all out there first so that you create the narrative and not somebody else is imagining the narrative”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So for example, some people just have like tonal aspects of their voice that society or 80% of people perceive as harsh. And they'll say, listen, so I'm just being totally honest here. And it's like, okay, that's coming across a little bit strong, a little bit this. And what I've been fascinated by is not everybody sees that. So, some people see it and some people don't. And I'll play it back for them. And they go, I'm just giving them advice. And I'm like, you really don't hear the difference between that? And they're like, no. And that's why you get some people in an organization that are hyperliteral and some that are more contextual and they clash. And that's why it's like, you said one word answer. You said this. You said that back and forth. But it's all this just.”
2024-01-09 · The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish · Blake Eastman: Learn to Read Anyone · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT