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Derren Brown

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2023-01-12
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2023-01-12
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  1. Yeah, I do. A while back, I got a, the only time I've ever dropped my own name trying to get a restaurant table in Soho, and I did, and I got the table. Suddenly I felt I pulled that off, went in, and then at the end of the meal, the waiter said, would you mind signing one of your books? Of course. And he came back with angels and demons.

    2023-01-12 · The Diary of a CEO · Derren Brown: UNLOCK The Secret Power Of Your Mind! · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  2. Why, I don't know it's just a real. Real sentimental like valuing of them, nostalgia as well. Like really I just find myself just Those kind of sentimental sort of leanings. And my friends just suddenly, they've obviously always meant a lot to me because they'd be my friends, but suddenly even more so. I love meeting up with people I haven't seen for years now. I love doing that much more than I used to. So yeah, that's it, mum, partner and a couple of really good friends. Don't include my dog. Z. Forgot, I didn't forget I had two dogs, but I have a clear favourite, which is unfortunate for the other one. I was only thinking of Doodle and I forgot about humbug.

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  3. I feel this is quite a boring answer, but it's honest, so mamma. A partner probably two really good friends Sharkey and Stephen, I'd have to include Jenny in there somewhere, so maybe they could alternate weekends or something. Yeah, friendship's really meaning a lot to me now as I get older, not old, but, you know, getting older. I think it happens something on your 50th birthday or something suddenly your friendship's really mean a huge amount to you.

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  4. Well, it is It's got a real heart to it, this one. You get all the feels, as some people say. It's also got, I mean, it's got the best, if this is all right to say, the best reviews of anything I've ever done in 20-odd years, which is nice to know because it is such a personal show. So that's a lovely... Thing that has been received so well I do swear the audience to secrecy so it's hard to go into details other than yeah it is about the things that connect us as people and how the difficult things in life are the things that join us up. It's also show based on audience participation like they all are and I should say I would hate the idea of being dragged up on stage And it's more than people expect, I hope. We always try and make the show properly over deliver, give you, give you more than you thought it would.

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  5. Yeah, it sort of is. And it's also hard to, you know, what is it? That used to mean the story of a life. It was something you couldn't say about anybody until they were dying and looked back over their whole life. You know, it's meant our relationship with God. We weren't even supposed to be happy on this earth because it was something that we could only have through union with God. It's meant so many things over the ages, but now it does just sort of mean a mood, which is... It makes it sort of a difficult one to answer. But I think life is good, it's just interesting and sometimes difficult, but ultimately good way.

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  6. Said things just change the currents of life shift a little bit, so I am, but I think I don't think it's about happiness, first of all. I think it's about meaning and it's about things in life that are bigger than you and how you throw yourselves into those things, which is what gives religion its meaning, that need for transcendence or finding the thing that's bigger than you. We all need it somewhere. Because if you don't have meaning in your life, that's when you have problems. Not really happiness is sort of a very difficult thing to pin down. And we can be unhappy, but it's when we feel meaningless that things get bad.

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  7. I think so yeah I think as I've got all the happiness is it was Easy to say I remember being asked that when I was single for a while. By Hugh Grant of all people we were sat opposite each other at dinner and talking about happiness maybe I was writing the book at the time I don't know and He said, Are you happy though? And he said it in a sort of a mood of like, no one's really, no one's really happy, are they? Maybe it was just the way he asked it, but I said yes and said it very confidently and felt it very confidently. And he didn't think he didn't know what to make of that. Or maybe he just didn't believe it. And now when you ask, I still feel it's yes, but I think things are more complicated. I think there's a more complicated in relationships. I've got older. 51, and I think that's a good sort of

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  8. And then just offload this stuff. And when, because I know I do it when my partner does this to me, he sort of offloads all this frustration. And I'm sure he do it too. It sounds like you do, is to go into this mode where we're saying, well, it's okay. It's probably just this. And why don't we think about it in this different way? And we're just doing exactly the same thing they've had all day. We're just not hearing. It's just not an intuitive thing, is that you sort of that is such an easy mode to go into.

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  9. Try that, you know what I mean, and also I think a big ally to that is the thing of not, which is such a guy thing to do, isn't it, is not fixing. Most of our frustrations come from the fact we just haven't really been heard or seen or understood during the day. So we've been bashing our heads against some wall. We come home. Yeah, exactly, exactly. So we they come home and

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  10. Seeing your partner is somebody you could spend a lifetime getting to know and and as a source of wonder and mystery I think is a very helpful thing.

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  11. Longevity at some point that has to shift into actually this person is a mystery and I might spend the rest of my life trying to get to know this person. That's I think that's okay and I think that's also the same within ourselves in the parts of ourselves that we're alienated from again the things that we just put outside of the story that sense of what the other is of the great mystery. It's there in magic, it's there within ourselves the sides of us that we need to live more comfortably with and in our relationships as well. Here is a great mystery that we sit down with every day and have breakfast with and talk to and misunderstand and disappoint and occasionally delight at each other and it's Know it's kind of Wonderful, and sometimes it's hard work and I think

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  12. And I think love for me is allowing that other person. To be another person, we probably start off our relationships just projecting everything we need onto a person, and we barely do them the service of allowing them to exist as an independent creature. We just want them to be the thing that we want them to be. And I think if relationships are going to have any...

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  13. And as people that live on the anxious side tend to be very sort of hyper vigilant about stuff. So, you know, packing to come to London to do this show is two very, very different walls always leads to argument. I'm kind of travel light and he's no, but we might do this. We might need this. We might need this, bags and bags and bags. So We see each other sometimes as caricatures of ourselves because we're quite different in those ways. My kind of stoic Whatever will seem to him just sometimes just to be laziness or not really not engaging with something, not that thing not taking it seriously. And for me his His what I see as anxiety or impatience to him is a strong sense of justice. He has a real strong sense of justice. Something's not right. He'll want to go and sort that thing out and fix it.

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  14. I've had two long relationships and then a few little bits in between and I think There are certainly a lot of learning in the first one that I think I've now brought to the second one. Of course that's what we do, isn't it? Next, you have another relationship. You bring all those lessons that you can't change them when you're in one, but you get to start afresh the next time. We're quite different as well. It's not like we're not similar people at all. I have that sort of a bit of emotional detachment that I can easily go to. He is very...

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  15. Perhaps, I mean, it sounds like you'd have to ask him. I don't know. I don't think he says that in his book, but I can certainly imagine that, again, so if you're going through your life feeling generally resentful. I can't imagine that person being very motivated

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  16. Exactly. And I think the reason why there's no kind of rational link, because it's sort of like an emotional basis. He's talking about an emotional heart that then kind of spirals upwards. Because if you... If you find yourself Acting more compassionately. Which Satan just sometimes happens anyway, right? You might just be feeling compassion, you might be feeling very grateful to somebody. That then affects that person's behavior and then that feeds back and affects yours. And there's a certain kind of upward spiral thing that happens that definitely puts us in, I think, a more just a better kind of state than say when we're feeling the opposite of those things, feeling hateful and resentful. So, I do get it. Sorry, go on.

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  17. How many, it's always dollars, but how many dollars? Like if you could have a hundred dollars a year from now or X amount now, what would that X amount be that would balance it out? And it's normally seventeen dollars. Like it really makes no fiscal sense at all. But most people will say, okay, I'll take $17 now rather than $100 a year from now. That seems to be the number that people go for. But if you're primed to feel grateful, if you're asked the same question when you're in a state of gratitude for something again totally unrelated, it goes up to thirty-one dollars. That was a great sort of by the by finding when they did the experiment, it averaged out at $31. In other words, people were valuing. The future needs more than the needs now, if that makes sense. It could actually be shown with something as simple as that gone.

    2023-01-12 · The Diary of a CEO · Derren Brown: UNLOCK The Secret Power Of Your Mind! · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  18. Again and again which help compassion, gratitude, and having the right sort of pride about what you do, a good pride for the stuff that you do well, not the bad sort of pride where you go, well, I'm good at this, therefore I'm great at everything, but just having a good sort of comfortable pride in the stuff that you do well. So he would, you know, experiments would be something happens outside the room before the person comes in to do the experiment that makes them feel grateful about something and then they come in and they have to do a task that's impossible. But how long do they spend trying to do it? And they'll spend 40% longer than somebody that wasn't primed to feel grateful before they came in. And the gratitude has nothing to do with the experiment. So seemingly completely independent thing. Something happens that makes you feel compassion. And then you come in and you have to do some task and you do it better or for longer or whatever these sort of skills are that the motivated person has more of. One of the questions was

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  19. He's talking about where you value your future self and what your future self needs more than what you need in the moment, right? So if you take the example of are you going to start if your exam or are you going to go out and party? Well Person that is going to not party and study for the exam is valuing the needs of that future self that's done well in the exam more than the current self that sat there and would like to go out right so he's taking that as the sort of the world of motivation we're talking about Various experiments to see what can you do to maximize people's The value that they place on that future self. And the three emotions

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  20. Sort of anxious personality than I have, and that stuff doesn't help him at all, but it certainly helps me. Another thing, there's a great book by David Destino called Emotional Success. And I thought it was great. He was talking about motivation and how a lot of our tools for motivation are very sort of... top down in the sense that you know well if you do this for 10 000 hours or you put in an hour a day for a whatever um like a lot of kind of work to change one habit And he's talking about a bottom up approach, there are certain emotions that if you get them into place, they naturally create a more motivational state. And he's a psychologist, when he talks about motivation, the way he's tested this.

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  21. On the big stoic thing of how can this thing be fine? And it's not, I don't exactly put it in that language, but that's the language I found. How could this thing be fine? So first of all is what's happened which side of the line is it within my control? Is it my thoughts and actions? Or is it out of my control? Is it something out in the world? Of course it's always the latter it's always something out in the world. In which case how could it be fine? How could it be okay that this thing is like that? And not just to go, oh it's fine, it's fine. It's not just about saying it, but to actually let that thought sort of drip into the soul. Very helpful, that's also partly just my personality, like my partner's as a much more

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  22. Well, those are the two problems. You either get the goal You succeed in it, and then what? Or you don't, and you've failed. I mean, you're sort of. And the very thing that's giving you pleasure, the very thing that's giving your life meaning, which is moving towards building up the company or whatever it is, you're doing yourself out of. You're purposefully and intentionally moving to the point where you can remove that meaning from your life.

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  23. It's about moving forward, isn't it? It's important because we need to navigate. Through life and in the first half of life, I think it's really important if you didn't have that optimistic sense that you can. Chase the castle in the air and somehow get it just by setting those goals. I think life would be very difficult. I think actually it's important. I'm sure it has evolutionary value. I think it's part of our impetus. So it's not a bad thing, really. Like all those things, we just need to. Check it and just see its limitations, I think.

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  24. What he thought was going to be important wasn't important. Plus, how do we know it's going to make us happy that so many years before was so terrible at caging that? We lose. Flexibility, depending how we set those goals, but we become too rigid in them. And it's like playing a game of chess Schopenhauer talks about this. That was a really good analogy that it's like starting a game of chess, deciding how you're going to play and the strategy you're going to use and how you're going to maneuver from the start. There is this other thing playing, which is life, fortune, stuff that's going to get thrown back at you. How can you decide those things?

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  25. didn't know to do with his life. It was miserable and actually found himself going to a support group with a bunch of similar millionaires that had all made the same mistake. And he'd sort of missed the fact that actually it was the building up of the company that was what gave him meaning in his life. That was what was important. And it's that old thing, isn't it, of, you know, the You know, the arrival at the end of the journey might just be taking your coat off and putting your bag down. That might be all it is. It's not necessarily the destination. The old thing, isn't it, of the journey being what was important? But certainly he realized that. And that really changed his life, actually, realizing.

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  26. If there's anything wrong with goal setting for short-term goals, that obviously can be very useful. It's the long-term stuff. I think we just get a bit hung up on it as a way of life. A friend of mine has always been a workaholic, and he certainly, by his own account, when he was younger, was made to feel that kind of needed to achieve stuff in order to feel valued, you know, which obviously is what most workolics will say. So he decided he was going to build up a company and sell it and become a multimillionaire, and that was sort of the goal, and then did spend and all the time that I knew him, he was building up a company and sold it relatively young and had a huge amount of money.

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  27. So I've always tried to make them about something else, something of value, and I don't think I love magic ownership. I don't think in and of itself it has the value as a childish way of impressing people, so it's what can you bring to it will give it value then I think then you're into a much more interesting worthwhile area

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  28. Yeah, I think it's all that's really. Otherwise, what's left, you know, just it's just hey, look at me, aren't I clever? And that's just not, you know, that might be interesting for audiences for a little bit, maybe once, and then that's kind of it. So I bring what I can to it. And I just make sure the shows are about something else. You know, showman is about... How the things in life that are difficult are actually the very things that we share, which weirdly was written just before it was all due to go out before lockdown started and it was going to go out the first week of lockdown and was a show about how the things in life that isolate us are actually the things that we all tend to have in common, which then gets played out literally for two years during lockdown.

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  29. So I'm painting a picture that someone comes up and thinks of a famous person and I start to. Do a painting and then it's upside down, and I flip it around at the end. Is that what you're thinking of? Yes.

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  30. That's so nice. It's always like what can I do? There's 2,000 people trapped in a room with me. What can I do with them? It's always a lovely feeling to start with.

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  31. Being an outsider, and you'd kind of use that. So that's always helped me, and I've just followed my knows for what feels fun and interesting and worth while, and as I've got older I've let those things grow with me and I find a lot of life much more interesting than magic. Magic's quite a childish thing, really, so It means that the stuff I find more. Interesting about life, I can bring into magic. If you've got both feet in your craft or your art form or whatever, as in if the thing feels to you so huge and expansive and all that you know, you can't, you're sort of a bit overwhelmed by it and you can't move it anywhere. If you've got one foot in that thing and your other foot in the rest of life, at least you've got some leverage then to take this thing that you do somewhere. Interesting, so maybe that's helped as well.

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  32. It when I first started, I remember reading I used to go on magic discussion forums and so on to see what magicians were saying about me and there was a lot of like, oh, this isn't even mentalism. Like there's a certain type of magic called mentalism and I wasn't quite doing that. I was doing stuff that wasn't and they would see that as a real sort of negative and I always thought that was interesting that that would bother anybody. A, who knows what the word even means, who cares and B that would that I wasn't somehow sticking within that So and that's another thing about playing on your own isn't it and you you If you feel like an outsider as a kid, I think as you get older, you value that. That becomes like a bit of a superpower. You hang on to that feeling of...

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  33. I never really know. I mean, mentalists, I think technically it's what I am, but I remember a couple of years ago, I had the book on happiness come out, which is a century book of Greek philosophy, come out the same month as a ghost trainer at Thorpe Park. And I do remember thinking, I don't know what that is. I don't know what job that is that allows for those two things. It certainly isn't mentalism. So yeah, just allowing the thing to grow up with me. And in terms of like, you know, Occasionally people talk about the brand and so on. It's a very helpful thing, I think. Just let the thing just be you. and not particularly be driven by the limitations of what

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  34. And then when things did sort of take off a bit, my manager also had a similar ethos of just sort of slow burn, slow burn. There was never any sense of me being thrown at a public or any sort of overnight success or anything like that. It was a very deliberate thing of just slowly kind of letting it Get out there, so that was helpful. I think as I've had a good team around me, it's not like a one, not really a one-man thing. Although I had had my own experience for those ten years of doing it on my own once I got into the TV, there was like a little group of us which I'm sure is fairly common. And then... I think what does help is letting it grow up with me as I've got older, I've just let the thing. Develop with me. I don't really know what job to, you know, you asked me before we started how I'd refer to myself.

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  35. I think I don't think it's that. I think it's sort of, it's not quite that intentional. I think you've probably grafted and done those things I can't speak for Jimmy and others, but probably just because you really enjoyed them in and of themselves. You probably weren't thinking I'm going to do this if I get ahead I can secure this for myself. Probably. And if that is the case, if you are just doing it because you love it, and that feels like in and of itself what you're doing, and there's no particular need for a plan beyond that, then you'll keep at it and you'll get very good at it if that feels like all you need in the moment anyway. Then why wouldn't you? Know love it and put all your passion into it and get very good at it. So that helped.

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  36. Anyone with the police went helping you? I don't know because it never went beyond them saying, would you come and talk to us about something and us getting back and saying No, it's not appropriate. I don't know. Now I want to know.

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  37. A little I suppose people would have to ask that, wouldn't I? I remember I'd been asked by the FBI, I'd been asked by the police. Really? To help, I mean, it's never gone beyond that discussion because I just, I mean, even there's plenty of businesses as well, but it's not my world. I feel like a... I'm an entertainer. I'm also quite introverted. I don't quite have that thing of like, you know, yeah, let me get out there and... A change the world or B I don't have whatever that thing is that I feel I could just apply this to.

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  38. Follow up, you know, there's plenty of infrastructure in place if you want to donate, but no infrastructure if you've been in any way adversely affected by it and you want help, or if you've had a healing and you don't know how to sustain that or what you're supposed to do other than being told to give more money.

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  39. And then, of course, people, because when you go to these events, the big name healers I've seen, Benny Hinn and others, what you don't really see when you watch those things on TV is that there are, in some of these big venues, hospital beds that have been brought in. There are people with, you know, a kid with Down syndrome that I spoke to the mum and she'd taken her son to so many shows following him around the country and things that just they're not going to get healed by those kind of dynamics. So that's an uglier sort of side of that because people have become very dependent on it and are not going to get any help. And then there's the lack of any sort of...

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  40. So there she was having this extraordinary experience she couldn't explain when really nothing had happened beyond she was just had been snapped out of something. That was Sort of amazing and kind of wonderful. Then I started to do the thing of going maybe I could do this. Maybe I could offer this as a show of like secular healing. It'll only work on some people and you're only dealing with relatively small percentages. And I did start to think that. Of course, that's where you start to go mad. That's where you start to think you're playing God and

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  41. Seeing, it's just a mixture of two things that are going on. There's adrenaline, which is a natural painkiller, so you make the whole experience full of adrenaline, you know, in the same way of a lion walked into this room and you previously stubbed your toe, you'd run away and you wouldn't feel the pain of your toe, right? Because there's a bigger threat. So that's just a treadling. That's fine. But this other thing that is maybe kick-started by the experience of the adrenaline, that you've, this thing that you've lived out, like presumably this woman, her arm had been fine for many years, but she just continued to live as if it wasn't. And all the stuff that you build up around pain, you know, the way people respond to you and say there's a whole network of social aspects to it, overprotecting something that doesn't need protecting anymore. It's much more complicated than simply the organic cause of your pain. There's lots of other things that sustain it and can keep it going beyond.

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  42. although I could explain it because I knew what I was doing, I It was what you're seeing is the psychological component of suffering, right? Like if you take an x-ray before and after, nothing's happened, nothing's changed, but how that person is living out their Affliction, their relationship to their suffering has that's been made to change. So what

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  43. Healers and of course people are arriving expecting it to work and they've got a certain amount of readiness for it which obviously helps and I didn't know if it was going to work at all but it did and again I'm sort of undercutting it like I'm doing it and I'm creating these healings and inverted commas for people in the audience but at the same time I'm kind of Undercutting it too It was extraordinary. I mean, I remember in the first week a woman came up and she'd been paralyzed. She was probably in her forties. She'd been paralyzed on one side of her body since she was four or something, in floods of tears because she could move her left arm for the first time. And night after night things like that, sometimes, as I imagine, just people with a bad back that felt better, but sometimes really quite dramatic things too. And it was

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  44. Two things come to mind. One, I was in a restaurant in Bristol, approaching a table which was always excruciating. If people aren't interested, and I'm walking up with a deck of cards, and I sort of introduce myself, and it's two businessmen. And one of them says, Oh no, no, thank you, Sropwich. And I said, okay. And as I walked away, the other one went, but Queen of Hearts, thirteen cards down. And I sort of laughed and walked away, then went into a corner and counted the cards down and the thirteenth one down was the Queen of Hearts. No idea how he did that. If you are listening, please get in touch. It has bugged me for 20 years. The other thing was actually doing, I did a show called Miracle, which is, this is also on Netflix. It was a previous stage show, a few stage shows ago. And the second half was healing. It was like evangelical healing, people being slain in the spirit and had no idea if it was going to work, because again, very skeptical audience, like not, you know, I've been to these events with these big, big names.

    2023-01-12 · The Diary of a CEO · Derren Brown: UNLOCK The Secret Power Of Your Mind! · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  45. Because again it means that you can do more interesting stuff with it. If there's a lesson in it about How we see the world how the story we tell ourselves is not what's real, how we mistake that story for reality. We mistake the limits of our own field of vision for the horizons of the world. If there's something in there to be said, in something as childish as magic, if there's something worthwhile to be said, it's much easier to say that if you're not trying to make it about yourself.

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  46. TV if you're doing stuff down the barrel of a TV if you're talking to people at home there's a level of directness and honesty there whereas it feels like on stage there's a kind of theatrical quotation marks around the whole thing so I feel like I can do things on stage which I wouldn't do on TV Um so that changes it too. It's quite an interesting line sort of treading that I kind of in the very early shows very early TV shows it was very much like I am doing this for real is what I said these are not tricks and then once the shows we realized there was going to be some longevity and there were going to be more shows it was important to me just to bring it back to a place that was honest and kind of ambiguous as well and to and I've enjoyed that now I like leaning into the ambiguity of what I'm doing

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  47. How we kind of can balance these things in our heads. So yeah, I'm sure people believe all sorts of things about me. I think the way I look at it is a bell curve. So at one end of the bell curve, it's people that think it's all fake. It's all stooges. It's all set up. And I never use stooges and that's not what it is. And at the other extreme, people saying I'm psychic and I won't admit to it, which is also not true. And then there's this main swell in the middle where people sort of get it. And that's really all you can, I think take responsibility for, really. There's always going to be people at the far edges that we'll have strange and extreme reactions. And then, you know, I think there's a certain license on stage which is different from...

    2023-01-12 · The Diary of a CEO · Derren Brown: UNLOCK The Secret Power Of Your Mind! · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT

  48. Well, I was going to say after that about a week into that show I came out there was a girl at stage door said I wondered if you could put me I say girl which is in her twenties but wondered if you could put me in touch with my grandmother who's passed on and I said oh God I'm so sorry I hoped it was clear from the show that I can't really do it that stuff isn't real and she no no I know I know you can't really do it and it's not real but I just wondered if you could just put me in touch with her like it was extraordinary

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  49. was giving them medium ship readings, right? So I say come up if you've lost somebody, if there's somebody that you'd want to get in touch with if you went to see a medium. And it's skeptical audience kind of like me, right? Because they're my audiences. So they've come up and sit down and I would start to give them these readings and I would say now I'm getting a message from your auntie. Jill, is that right? Do you have an auntie Jill that passed away? Yes, and she's saying she's not saying anything. I'm just making this up, but she's saying that you've got, oh, you've got a little dog called Bella that she really loves. Is that right? Yes. And I'm lying to you, but so I would like Pepper, these impossible information that I was giving with reminders that I was making it up. And I just found that really, really sort of interesting and theatrically it was really interesting and much more interesting than saying these people are fake and prove it. And if you can prove it, I'll give you a million dollars or whatever. So I've tried to find a more creative approach to that.

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  50. When I have sort of attacked those areas, rather than just attack them and make it negative, I've always tried to recreate something and make it more interesting and better while at the same time saying I'm not really doing this. So, for example, in one of the shows I did... I had an audience on stage. This was an infamous, which was a previous stage show, and I

    2023-01-12 · The Diary of a CEO · Derren Brown: UNLOCK The Secret Power Of Your Mind! · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT