YouSaid · the spoken record

Louise Perry

lines on the record: 141
first: 2024-06-20
most recent: 2024-06-20
sittings or episodes: 1
sources: podcast

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“Yeah, and that's interesting, isn't it? And it does suggest that to some extent marriage is becoming a luxury good. And there's this phenomenon, right, where a lot of people who are from those kind of elite graduate classes will talk the 1960s but walk the 1950s. So they'll proclaim all the stuff about freedom and individual choice or whatever, but actually they live pretty conventional lives. They tend to get married. They tend to stay married. They tend to have 2.5 children, etc., and be very actually be very conservative in their own choices, even if they don't necessarily promote those choices. So, you know, there's that. And actually, I think it's probably because... People know”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“The other thing is that there is a lot of, it's not just, it's true, yes, that the people who have multiple marriages are more likely to get. Some people can be kind of serial offenders in this regard, right, with divorce. It's also, you know, there's a massive skew with class and education. So only about 10% of graduates who get married will get divorced.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“There are lots of reasons why that's a difficult time. And it's quite common for people to, whether or not they're married, but for people to break up during that period and then to regret it because actually it's a temporary period of your life, it will get better, you will get less stressed, you will get less tired, etc. So to some extent a divorce culture will sometimes encourage people to make permanent decisions which they will regret. And there are stats showing that quite a lot of people do regret getting divorced, something like a third. People regret getting divorced. So there's that.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yeah, okay. I take all of that But I do think that while the divorce rate is to some extent a product of a divorce culture, right, where it's very permissible, in fact very normal for people to, you know, really, really like tricky bit for people to get through is the first year after a first child is born because everyone's tired, everyone's stressed, there are money pressures, et cetera, et cetera.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Something that one can people have experimented with, right? Like attempts at communal child rearing, say, or, I mean, what to some extent you can do is depend on the state. Depend on the welfare state, depend on, say, state-provided childcare services, things like that. All of those solutions kind of work but come with significant downsides. The only solution I think the best solution that we've come up with historically is for the father of the child to play that role, basically.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Your biological goal becomes keep this baby alive. And the baby is completely dependent on you. There's this child psychotherapist, Donald Winnicott, said there's no such thing as a baby, there's only a baby and someone, right? Babies can't survive on their own. And normally that someone is the mother. And when it comes to things like breastfeeding, it has to be, really. I mean, we now have formula and so on, so we can sort of, it's that old thing of using technology to take the edge off some of these social realities, but it's still basically the case that mums and babies are like tied together like this emotionally, biologically. And during those times in your life you need another adult, at least one other adult, who's gonna do the Know getting food, paying rent, doing all this basic stuff to support you. And who that adult is.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“If you looked at their relationship in an individualist way, you were like, okay, you've got one human being who wants to be fed and another human being who can provide the feeding. But they're autonomous agents. They can just make their own decisions or whatever. She's like, no, no, no. I can't just decide now I'm going to ignore it. I'm going to go back to bed. Every cell in your body is saying, I must go feed my baby. It completely changes who you physically, psychologically. It's like completely transformative experience because you”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Mothers and babies aren't really individuals, right? In the sense that they're not completely autonomous. My friend Mary Harrington, who's also an author, she said that this really realized this for the first time when she had her daughter. And her baby was crying to be fed in the middle of the night. And she realized that in a sort of...”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yeah, because okay, so the key reason I think that marriage is good specifically for women, right? It's good for men too, but this like particular reason why it's good for women and why I think that feminist arguments against it are flawed is that The Nature of Carrying Children is that you have a period of some period of time where you cannot participate in the labour market, right? Where you're too pregnant, you've got a newborn, whatever. I mean, when I had my first baby, I calculated that in the first weeks and months of his life, I was spending 40 hours a week just breastfeeding, right? So you can't.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Diamond ring is a pretty good one, don't you think? There are other ways you could demonstrate it, but that's a really good one and it's a kind of tried and tested one.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Commitment, not even any necessarily social acknowledgement of the relationship. It might be just friends with benefits or something that can be really painful. So it's a good idea to basically if you hold off on having sex, you hold off on having that effect and it means you can make clear-eyed decisions. If you see red flags, you're more likely to respond to them properly if you're not like befuddled for oxygen, basically. The other thing is it's like... Just a really, really good demonstration of commitment. If you always risk getting pregnant, you always do, even if you're on modern contraception. There's always that risk. And do you want a man who is going to ditch you if that happens, basically? Like, how can you find some guarantee that he's not going to do that?”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Having sex because it will like dull your emotional bonding response, things like that, which I just find so dystopian. I'm like, or you could just not, or, you know, you don't have to try and biohack your brain to endure something you don't really want to do. But anyway, women get more emotionally bonded from sex than men do, and then you do end up with this kind of asymmetry, which comes up in the group chat, right, of like she basically is more into him than he is into her. And if there's no...”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yeah, I think that you can measure it in terms of things like oxytocin. And I wrote about this in the book. There's this whole horrible genre of journalistic articles basically advising women on how to have casual sex without being miserable and sort of what can you do to hack your brain so that you can have casual sex without feeling dreadful afterwards. This is like public acknowledgement that this is a thing. And one of the pieces of advice is things like take ecstasy.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I'm sure that's part of it, but there is like if you're directly involved in caring for your own child, you do as a man, you do become less Less high tea, and that has a sort of taming effect, right? Or it's like, or it's channeling male energies in a different direction, which at a societal scale can be really in terms of having a peaceful, stable society. And polygamous societies do tend to be more unstable in that sense. There's more domestic violence in polygamous societies. There's more conflict within households. Like there are quite a lot of bad outcomes that you get from polygamous systems. So even though monogamy is maybe not the norm anthropologically, it does seem to be a good norm. And some of the most successful societies have adopted monogamy as their norm and have been successful partly because of that.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“One downside of it is having a lot of unmarried or like having a lot of sexless spend is quite bad for social stability because they're very frustrated. They're angry. They don't have a lot to lose. One of the really interesting things about going back to testosterone, when men have children and get married, their testosterone levels drop. Become less aggressive, like in the year after a baby's born, men commit less crime. They're less promiscuous, like there's a real sort of”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Whereas in a polygamous system, obviously that's completely permissible and in extreme circumstances you'll have high status men having 100 women or something like that in historical examples and then low status men just have none. And it's quite an unstable, one of the downsides of polygamous system, it is quite common and it's probably to some extent our species norm is I think it's what people kind of do and left to their own devices. That's like the natural way we settle if there are no social restrictions.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Well, this is what's interesting about the monogamy polygamy system, right? In a monogamous system, to some extent that's prevented because these high status men, unless you're like a king, unless you're Henry VIII, okay, you can't have multiple women on the go. You have to commit to one woman and basically remove yourself from the dating pool, right? And so it isn't possible for the really attractive men to sort of amass a lot of women. And so I've heard it described as sexual socialism, monogamous marriage, because it does sort of encourage like an equalizing effect.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“There's really nothing stopping those men from just having loads of girlfriends, maybe having them at the same time, like having little harems, right? You know, not calling them that, but having basically playing the field and not being forced to commit because like no one expects them to really. And it's like Good Fun for those men. It's frustrating for the women because they're like they're having relationships with these men in the hope that it will turn into commitment and then it never does. And so they end up feeling really bitter, right? And it's also frustrating for the less attractive men who are getting no attention whatsoever and who read me or listen to me saying the sexual revolution was good for men. And it's like it wasn't good for me. I know I know, I know. There's a real, there's like an inbuilt inequality.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“One of the sometimes people exaggerate this effect a little bit, right? But there is a tendency for basically very attractive men, high status men, the Hugh Hefner's, right, to do really well on dating apps, to get a lot of attention from a lot of women. And then for the bottom chunk of men in terms of attractiveness to get none, to just get no matches whatsoever. And this is a tendency. It's called hypergamy, female hypergamy, that women will tend to want to marry up socially. So they'll want to marry a man who is richer than them, better educated than them, more successful than them, etc. Yeah, I mean, this is basically what you see when people are left to their own devices on dating apps and you can monitor it carefully. That is basically what people do. And the problem you end up with is when you don't have a system of monogamous marriage and you don't have the expectation that people wait,”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Very, very high figures compared with say 100 years ago. Very, very high figures. So we've seen basically the dissolution of that old order. And there are upsides to that. There are. But there are big downsides too. And I think Every culture has marriage customs of some kind. Pop from ours, sort of. Like, what makes us think? That we alone among peoples can just have a free for all, can just style it out, people do whatever they feel like. Do you know what I mean? I think that what anthropology tells us is that actually we need structure, we need conventions and constraints and templates. And those will sometimes feel restrictive and there will sometimes be people for whom they don't work very well. But I think the idea we can just do without them is not true. I mean, going back to the polyamory thing, if you look at dating app data,”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Sex with more people, a woman wants to take a man down. It's a really complicated game. And what society's come up with is ways of regulating it, ways of regulating heterosexuality, basically, right? Which means restricting women's freedom. It does. That's what feminists have always noted. It also means restricting men's freedom. It says there are certain things that men can't do. And we had such a system. We had the can't have sex outside of marriage. marriage has to be monogamous all these all these rules that you have to ask the bride's father's permission all this stuff we had it all right and we basically threw out the window i mean it lingers a bit but we have very low i mean in london right uh now half of children will reach the age of 15 without their biological father in the home”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Don't work like throwing conventions out of the window. That's not how humans work. We have a tendency to construct in one way or another rules around these things. And human reproduction is like the most important. It's a very, very complex and delicate thing, right? That you have to get right. It's really, it's like this enormous coordination problem. You've got to find the right person. You've got to find them at the right time. You've got to like ensure commitment from them. And of course, there's this whole game about how men might want to.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Marriage through polyamory, but we can get on to that. The thing is, I just think the thinking that went for sort of radicals of the 1960s, what happened in the 1960s, it was the pill and other tech as well. It was also an ideological thing. It was also people wanting to completely reject the old order, you know, reject religion, reject conservatism, whatever. And what a lot of people said at the time was why we needlessly restricting people, why we, you know, limiting people's freedom in a way that makes them miserable. We just got to throw this out the window, right? And I think that.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“It's called the Anthropologist Vito. If you find a culture that doesn't have this, then you can kind of strike it off the universal's list. But the universals list Some fashion. Every culture has gender roles in some fashion. Every culture has wages war in some fashion. There are things that everyone does. And everyone has marriage customs of some kind. They can look different from ours. I mean, the most common way in which cultures differ from our culture or at least our culture up until recently is permitting polygamous marriage. So about 80% of cultures permit polygamous marriage, only permitting monogamous marriage is more unusual. I think we're drifting back towards permitting polygamous.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Quite a weird thing to demand, which is why I said three months in the book because it seemed like more reasonable and more achievable. And also because my mum said to me when I was, she read the draft, she was like, if you say this, if you say wait till engagement or marriage, that's the first thing every reviewer is going to notice about the book. It's going to be a big deal. So you'll get more of a hearing, you know, if you're more reasonable. The thing is we're a really weird culture in this regard. Like basically every other culture, there is obviously variation. So my first degree was anthropology. And one of the things about anthropology, which is so powerful and interesting when you're interested in contemporary social issues, is that there are a lot of different differences between cultures. Of course there are. And that's what's interesting for anthropologists. But there are also a lot of similarities. And actually there have been various efforts over the years to compose lists of human universals, which you find in absolutely every culture.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I'm saying that because there are trade-offs and I acknowledge them. And also it's more difficult to do that in a culture where that's weird. Because what you end up doing is cutting out anyone for whom that's too weird, right? You basically cut out a big chunk of your possible matches by insisting on that, unless, say, you're very religious, in which case everyone in your religious community is going to have the same expectation. But for most people, that's going to be quite...”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Modern technology can encourage a level of pickiness, which is actually really counterproductive and probably actually, and again, it's like. I think so much of mutual sexual attraction is about pheromones, about vibe, about being in person and dating apps don't capture that. At all. So I'm sure that definitely works against. Yeah, there are 100% women who are way too picky. Definitely, definitely.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“We're not coming Yes, and yeah, and I think it's probably true going back to this memetic thing, right, there are probably some Social status signs which are very mimetic. Like one of the things that some women will do, for instance, is they'll say, I will only date a man over six foot and actually and just set that cut off and you can be very objective about that on the app because they say how tall you are. I mean, I'm sure everyone's exaggerating, but like they say how tall you are. And it's a really silly thing to do actually because you're cutting off like, I don't know, 80% of men more, depending on the group of men. You're just cutting them out. And actually, if you were to meet this person in real life, the fact that they were 5'9". Wouldn't you wouldn't even notice probably so sometimes I think that”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Lifting cars because their child is stuck under it and they just have this like almighty surge of strength. Like there are, and actually that's an interesting situation where women can be very aggressive in defending their children. And that's true in other species as well, that you can have this just the red mist descends in that set of circumstances. So, yeah.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And you don't really know if you're like that, I think, until you're confronted with a situation like that. You know when women will definitely do that, that absolutely not thinking is protecting their kids, yeah. And you do read amazing accounts of women.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yeah, what's really interesting about this physical courage thing is so often people say later that they didn't even think about it. It wasn't, there was no conscious process, there was no like, should I, or should I? They just do it.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Women have Maybe, although women really don't commit very much violent crime at all. So, if you're talking about physical altercations, the chances of it being a woman are not high.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Has its disadvantages, it translates into sexual violence and violent crime and whatever, but there are also obviously situations where you need that where actually having physical courage is so important if you're running into a burning building or whatever. Again, it's this like eternal problem that societies have to try and solve. Like we have this youthful male energy and we want to put it to the best possible purposes and we don't want it put to dangerous purposes like how do we do that?”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“There's a lot of body calm footage you can watch of, say, a female and a male police partnership confronting someone, the man goes right in, and the woman is like... Because these are quite deep seated instincts to be less physically aggressive. And this is a thing. I mean, we've talked about right at the beginning, this thing like, you know, the testosterone curve for men in their teens, 20s, 30s”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“It depends, doesn't it? I mean, yeah, there's also, yeah, policing is a complicated one because also in America say whether police have guns, female police are less likely to shoot than male police are. So, you know, maybe that's good, right? But if it's something like.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“The big one. It's also aggression. You do need a certain level of, you can watch a lot of body cam of... Police having physical altercations. And it's quite common, for instance, to see female police hesitate more than male police do because I think.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“The requirements. Yeah, don't lower the standards so that you can get more women into these physical roles. Just accept the fact that there will be, I mean, I do know actually one female firefighter that I know personally from Jiu-Jitsu. She's so strong. She's so fit. She passed very, very high standard. Great. You know, you will get that woman in a thousands who can, and in which case fine, you know. But what I don't think is wise at all is like engineering it such that you have 50-50 in every role. I think that that's a recipe for disaster.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yes, that's true. But one of the things that they've done over the years because of pressure, like feminist pressure, to be blunt, is that they've changed the standards. So they've, say, reduced the upper body strength component, or they've made the, like in policing and in firefighting all these military, you have to a bleep test, stuff like that, they lower the standards necessary in a lot of roles.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So, I think women should be involved in criminal justice, but for instance, probably women are better at interviewing. I wouldn't be surprised an interrogation, you know. So there are probably some roles where women are going to outperform men. Again, it's, you know, it's the overlapping bell curves. There'll be some men who are really good at this, whatever, but you'd expect there to be a female advantage in that role. But there isn't a female advantage in the like. Out and having physical confrontations with people role. And I think that's fine. I don't think that we should. This is a very frustrating tendency in policing, in fire service as well, for people to notice the fact that there are fewer safe female firefighters and therefore to lower the physical demands to get more female firefighters in.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yeah, exactly. Exactly. I think there are probably some roles where, or indeed things like in policing, for instance. Know to be really direct, I don't think that women should be in frontline policing roles because I think that the physical differences are too profound, particularly in the UK where women don't carry guns. The average woman, even a really strong fit woman, is going to really struggle in a direct confrontation with the average male.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Things that I can't see. Yeah, I mean, there's a great book to be written about how these sex differences play out in the workplace. Because again, I think it's because there's a bit of a taboo about talking about it too much. And there is obviously a risk. I mean, I don't. Reason, the big reason why feminists don't want to overplay these psychological differences between men and women is because historically they have been used to discriminate against women that women are too irrational to do X, Y, Z, and that's a completely reasonable concern. But I also think that just pretending, therefore, that they don't then don't exist doesn't really do anyone any favours because they do. And I think we should just be honest. And be honest, but also simultaneously be like, you know, this doesn't mean that women are inferiors.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Casts you out, there are so many downsides, even aside from the physical threat. We've evolved some very good systems to try and protect ourselves against that. I also think that to some extent, you know, the 15-year-old girls, they do have these instincts, so they have some degree of inbuilt protective instincts, but they also, they do also lack life experience. Which is, I think, why we have or ought to have social conventions that also protect them.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“These women know nothing about this. They're not familiar with local police statistics or whatever. It's just vibes. They just feel unsafe in these areas. Vibes are actually really accurate, surprisingly so. And I guess because, yeah, it's this evolved thing that... Like to put it really bluntly, rape is a very bad outcome for women evolutionarily, right? It's something you really want to avoid. And so we have these inbuilt systems. Sometimes, but it is also just like the Well, there are several costs. There's the carrying a bait, the rapist baby, and all the downsides of that, right? There's the risk of being ostracized by your community. Maybe your husband like...”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Interesting question. I would guess probably yes, because particularly in relation to the sexual violence threat. Which women carry and men don't as much. I mean, men certainly don't carry it from women. If men get sexually assaulted, it will be about other men, almost always. Like again, you know, really interestingly, if you show women, I think this is true for women but not for men, as far as I know, if you show women a map of their local area and ask them to say which streets they would not want to walk down alone late at night. And they highlight those streets. They map on perfectly to actual rates of crime.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“All of the stories, but I remember there's one of a woman who a man offered to help her carry her shopping up to her flat. And he was really insistent about it. And she was like, okay, so she let him. And then as soon as he was in the flat, he shut the door and attacked her and she was lucky to survive. She said later. It was weird. He didn't feel like he was just being nice. She got bad vibes from him. She got the ick, whatever. There was something like going on. But her conscious brain said he's just been nice. And so she ignored her instincts and she led him into her flat. That's the sort of example where actually, I think that our unconscious brains are actually very wise about a lot of these things.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“to be a bodyguard He's like a personal security expert and he tells all these stories it's mostly about women and maybe this applies to men too where women basically ended up getting attacked by men who they did actually have bad vibes about in some way but they ignored those and it cost them right and his argument is that fear is a gift and that you should listen to your instincts because often again highly you know very evolved to be very very attuned to these instincts right there's a reason why we are descended from people who listen to their instincts in this regard and often you're unconscious will spot things that you're conscious brain hasn't spotted and maybe you'll be worried about being impolite or being weird or whatever you know so I can't remember”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I'm not sure if it would be a personal ic. But I guess maybe we should respect it as an idiosyncratic it. I don't know. I think in general, this case for men as well. I think this goes for people. I think it's ever had the gift of fear, Gavin De Becker book, a really great book. It was published 30 years ago or something. I think Oprah made it quite a big deal. And it's about, it's by”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Exactly, yeah, that's a sensible thing to be doing, really. I think X should be listened to generally, do you think? Like our, I think our bodies often know, I think our bodies are often sensitive to little cues that we might miss consciously”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Although my lady think for a woman they were like deciding whether to marry, do you know what I mean? Because men do tend to have sort of two, they're kind of two tracks, like there's the woman I'd have sex with and there's a woman I'd marry and they're different in different categories. And maybe the ad in about couple boxes necessarily, but maybe what it's showing is...”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yeah the really interesting expression, isn't it? It's that women use it to mean when they're like, they like man and then suddenly something switches and they get the ick. And all of a sudden they're like, oh no.”
2024-06-20 · The Diary of a CEO · "Casual Sex Is Almost Always Dangerous For Women!" This Is What Casual Sex Is Really Doing To Women - Louise Perry · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT