YouSaid · the spoken record

Ramit Sethi

lines on the record: 143
first: 2019-05-21
most recent: 2019-05-21
sittings or episodes: 1
sources: podcast

Every line below is reproduced as it was said and linked to the record it came from. Nothing here is summarised or generated. Directory · Search · Corrections

“Therapy earlier? Well, I mean, that's why I'm here. I want to share with people don't just hope that it will kind of work itself out over time. Everybody involved in the process wants it to stretch out. The lawyers, they're not trying to just bill you more, but their incentive is to get you the best deal and the other lawyers to get the other one. You have to take control and manage the process, but both of you have to be aligned on that. I would have, yeah, definitely talked to a therapist ahead of time with my wife. We would have gone there together faster. And we kind of would have, I would have started off not talking about money, but like rather about meaning. And that's something that I'm hoping to be able to talk more about. But I hope from people listening to this, if you go in and you've got a spreadsheet that you want to discuss, you've taken a wrong turn. That's what I did. I should have talked about meaning and fears and hopes of.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Number one, I should have talked about money with my wife way earlier, like way earlier. I violated my own advice, and that was horrible. I should have talked about it earlier. Two, I should have stopped being Mr. Spreadsheet, dude, and actually listened and said, like, let's put the numbers aside and talk about what money means. For me, I told you, I'm proud of it. My wife wanted to feel safe. She wanted to know that if anything went wrong, that she would be taken care of. And that, and I didn't really internalize what that meant to her. Like, what does that mean? I should have listened, should have gone to see a therapist earlier. And we should have not let it stretch out for as long as it did. That was really torturous for both of us.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“We're having the lawyers go back and forth, but now we were connecting more with each other financially. And we were reminded by this therapist, like we're a team, this is just an agreement we need to come to, but remember why you are together, remember why you're getting married. We finally came to an agreement and we signed it. And it's funny because one of my buddies, he held an event called, should you sign a prenup. And he invited like 20 or 25 people, right? And one of his friends who was married and had done a prenup sent him a note and said, I'd rather be dead than come to this event. And he was like, whoa, whoa, why? And he's like, dude, that was the worst six months of my life. Imagine you have someone you love and you're arguing about money with lawyers for six months. And I didn't get that until I'd gone through it. I would say that in retrospect, I learned a couple of things.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“We literally opened up Yelp and typed like therapist, and we found one two blocks away. So that's how it's done, guys. And we walked over there and we sat down in this room. We had a conversation like we've never had before. This therapist was very good. She asked us about how we grew up with money, what it meant. And it turns out it meant totally different things to us. Like for me, it meant being proud of what I've accomplished. It meant all the work. And for anyone who's built anything, you know the sacrifices it took to build that. You look back. You can remember Friday nights where you didn't go out or you can remember X or Y or risks you took. And I was seeing that. And what my wife was seeing was something different. Money meant something different to her. And this therapist helped us kind of bring that up. And we find ourselves, you know, we went one, two, three sessions. We find ourselves talking about our childhood. And it's kind of like a caricature, like a joke of what you talk about in therapy session. But we walked out of each of those sessions like, wow, that was pretty good. That was pretty helpful. So we still...”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Like, I've thought about money for 15 or 20 years every day. Like, this is my business, and I'm really proud of what I've accomplished financially. And I always love to come. And I made a very fair, very fair offer bending over backwards. That was my perspective. My wife's perspective was very different. And I think And she would say something, and I would say, Look at the spreadsheet, look at the numbers. And she was like, yeah, but, and she was talking about something else in a completely different language. And I was so preoccupied with like Mr. Spreadsheet guy. So finally, she said, you know, we got to go talk to somebody about this. We should go see a therapist. And I was like, yeah, we really should. I totally agreed with her. So, you might wonder where do you go to find a therapist? And for us, the answer was Yelp”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I always say for every major purchase in your life, every major purchase and every major decision, spend the time. Most of us should spend less time on most decisions and we should spend a lot more time on a few key decisions. Like I want to take this seriously. So did my wife. So we did. We spent months, right? So now here we are. The lawyers are going back and forth. And it's starting to get a bit slow. Like they're arguing and now we're talking about it and it became stressful and at some points like pretty heated. Okay. And I was like. I mean, there are so many things that happen during this time. One, we would just stop talking about it for like weeks at a time because it was just too stressful. And we had never had these kind of conversations before about money. And like my perspective was”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I approached it very much like can do. It's like hiring someone, I'm going to make them an offer. I want to make him a great offer. And I expect that we're going to have some back and forth. But overall, it's about coming to an agreement that we can both work in a capacity together. Now, I know that sounds a bit unromantic for a marriage, but I'm talking about the financial part of a marriage. There's a whole, there's so many different layers. And we in America only talk about love. What I'm trying to share is like there are lots of other parts. Like be aware of it. Don't put your head in the city.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So there's a lot there. The way I thought about it was I love my wife. I love when we're together. She makes me a better person and I think I do the same. And together as a team, we are like amazing. Like I love laughing with her. I love how she challenges me. And I want to deepen that relationship. The financial part of it for me was a part that I wanted to address, but I also felt confident knowing that we could solve it We could come to an agreement. And I didn't see it as adversarial, at least until the middle part, which I want to tell you about. Okay. But.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“It's a great question. And I think only in this day and age can this question really be asked? Because as recently as 25 years ago, this question would have never been asked. It would be like, of course, you're going to get married. And now you and I both know plenty of people who are either single or in cohabitating relationships or casual, whatever the case may be, and they're perfectly happy not being married. I think for me the answer is probably all the above. It was a desire on my part, a desire on my wife's part, and also our family's. And this might be an invisible script from my childhood that I always saw myself as married.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Kids are definitely a complicating factor, but you are not really dictating the terms of child of what's it called. Custody and also payments, the state will determine that. So that's really important to know as well. You can't come up with a rule right now that says, you know, if we have three kids and this marriage ends, like I'm going to write you a check for $1 or $1 million a month. That can't work. The state will decide based on lifestyle positions.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And so there are also other questions about what if you're living in a house with kids and the marriage ends, who leaves how soon that has to be dictated, right? And then there are other questions about is there a cap on how much can be paid out? And that's important too. Understand though a couple of things. The money that I'm going to speak generally now The money that is earned when you are together is generally community property, right? So when you are married, generally the money that is earned is together. It's yours. There are certain exceptions, like if you have a business, there's this and that, and you can kind of carve those out ahead of time. But in general, we're talking about money that was accumulated before the marriage. That's really important to understand.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“That is a great question. Yeah, what does it look like? It can be decided however you like, but each lawyer is going to argue for their side. So the person who would be receiving the payments is going to want it all up front.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Somebody to walk out of the marriage with just this large amount of relative assets and the other person left with nothing. That's just not fair. It's not fair in my eyes personally, and it's not fair in the state's eyes either”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“You could call it that. And then both partners might still have a job, etc. But what happens if the marriage now ends 30 years later? Let's say there's two or three kids. Let's say that one partner has stopped their job so that he or she can take care of the kids. Well, it's kind of fair that that person should be compensated in some way because it would be unfair for”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yeah, because we talked about what does it mean for us, like our rich life now. What does it mean? And it means that when we travel, we can take our parents with us and we can spend extra for them to stretch their legs out. We can travel to places or we can make certain investments or take risks that we might not normally be able to do. Again, as a team. So that was actually one of my favorites. Now we had listed out all our assets and liabilities, and now the basic structure of a prenup is what happens in the case of the marriage ending. And there are so many ways to cut it. No two prenups are alike. What happens if the marriage ends in three months at an extreme? In many cases, a check is written. Can you believe that? If a marriage ends in three months, somebody might write a check to the other person. Why? Just like pure goodwill.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“A year or two later, she said, You know, I feel a little unbalanced because you know everything about my finances, but I don't know anything about yours. And that was when I realized like I had made a huge mistake. By not telling her, I had put myself in a very unbound, she had been placed in an unbalanced position. It's just not fair. So that afternoon we talked about it and we talked about my net worth. We talked about what it means for us. And that was, I would say, one of my most pleasant conversations.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“The first thing is you're laying out all the assets that each person has. Those could be assets, liabilities. You kind of put those out on the table. By the way, that was a good conversation that we had. I forgot to take my own advice about when to talk about money with your partner. So my wife had asked me years ago to help her with some 401k thing. And I was like, yeah, I'll help you, but first read my book. So she reads my book. And then she was like, okay, I still have this one question. So we went through it and I got to understand her pay and all that stuff. And it was great. Like we worked through it.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Trash out. This person's changing the diapers. It's an arrangement. It's a team. And on any team, you have to have a set of rules. And so I got comfortable with that saying, you know what, this is a love marriage. We found each other. We met each other. We love each other. But it's also we want to make sure that this is a team. And we're setting expectations. So we went through the process and we talked to our lawyers and the lawyers are hammering it out. And this is where it started to get really tough. Everything was going great. But then once you everything's great in concept, and then you talk about real numbers.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“The reason why this is such a heated topic for people, I think there's two reasons. One, there's just a general ignorance of prenups because it is inherently a private affair. Inherently when you have assets being discussed, it happens behind closed doors, specifically lawyers' closed doors. It's not public. There are no good guides or no e-books on how to do a prenup. There's nothing. There's not even any sample prenups out there. They're very, very poor quality. The second thing is it attacks our belief that in America a marriage is purely about love. And I believe a marriage is absolutely about love, but go look at any parents or any couple that has, let's say, kids. Go look at them and look at their day-to-day. Yes, there's love, but there's also teamwork. There's this person's doing dinner. This person's taking the...”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yeah, absolutely. I had to get comfortable with the idea that this wasn't a bad thing. I wasn't planning for us to fail. And that's the most common objection people have to prenops, which is you're planning for it to go wrong. I'm not planning for it to go wrong. I intend to be married forever. I want to. I always emphasize that with my wife. And I made it clear that we're a team. But I also mentioned that I've for whatever reasons I've accumulated these things and it's really important for me to plan for what might happen. As we talk more and more about it, it became even more and more clear that in every other part of life, top performers plan. They plan ahead. They plan for good. They plan for bad. They plan. But it's like just in this one situation of life that society has told everyone, no, that's wrong. You shouldn't plan it all. You should go into it like a doe.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And we start to go through hammering these basic terms out. Now, the basic structure of a prenup is most people don't need a prenup because most people are coming into a marriage with relatively similar assets. The places where it starts to make sense are if you have some major amount of assets, whether it be a house, whether it be an inheritance, a business, those kinds of things, it starts to make sense to think about. Had to get”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Me, so to her credit, she said, You know what? I'm surprised. I didn't expect it, but I'm open to it. Let me get educated about it and we can talk. Okay, great. So that was as good of a response as I could have hoped. She goes off and she does her own research. She talks to her friends and we start discussing more and more, right? We've got, oh, about four or five months until I propose to her. We start talking. The next step is to get lawyers. Now, interestingly, you have to retain counsel. Each side has to retain counsel. And oftentimes what happened is the person who has more assets will actually pay for the other person's lawyer, which I did. These lawyers are very expensive, right? So I said, you know what? I'll take care of that. I'm happy to do it. So she found her own lawyer.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“It's really important to me that we discuss a And she was surprised, kind of taken aback. She's like, okay, what do you mean? And I said, look, you and I grew up very similar. We both grew up in California. Our parents have similar jobs. And I said, because of certain decisions I've made, because of my business, and because of a lot of luck, I've been put in this fortunate position where I have a business and I've accumulated a certain amount of assets. I said it's really important for me that we talk about what that means before we get married and that we sign an agreement in the worst case if something bad happened. And this was really, I was nervous, very nervous because like what is someone's reaction going to be? I have no idea. But I thought if anything is going to be bad. But I felt very, I was nervous, but I also felt confident because it was something that I knew that I wanted to do. Like it was really important.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Four or nothing, so we go through the list, and the good news is we were generally on the same page. It's funny thing she goes, you know, I'd really like to be engaged by Q1 of next year. I'm like, oh my God, this is the girl of my dreams. She's talking in financial quarters. I'm like, I love you, babe. So then at the end of that conversation, I said, you know, there's something else that's important.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“May be part of it, but it's. I hadn't even brought the prenup up. So we go through kids, and I told her, I even mentioned to my wife, I said, you know, let's talk about the names of our kids because I never saw myself having some kid named Mike. I don't want a Mike running around in my house. She's like, what the hell? Where is this coming from? I'm like, I just feel particular about this.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Just the two of us No, no, no. We were just the two of us. We talked about when would we like to be engaged and married? Where would we live? Do we want to have kids?”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“When we had my girlfriend at the time, we sat down, we had a really serious meeting. Like we actually had a Google agenda. We came with our bullet points and we had a very adult meeting where we talked about.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“How to sign a prenup, you're going to find a lot of really generic and borderline bad advice. It's from disgruntled Redditors and it's from like ask men or these just magazines where they have these things, this advice like you should blame it on your lawyer or you should blame it on your parents or how do you get away with not making your fiance mad? And I just thought this is not the way I want to start this relationship and this financial relationship as well because that's what marriage is. It's legal. It's financial. It's also love. You're a team in every way. So I sat down. I did a lot of research. I talked to a lot of my friends. And the thing that shocked me was when I started bringing up with friends, so many of them, especially entrepreneurs had lots to say. Lots. So I'll fast forward to what happened.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“What's going to happen eventually? And we're together for the long term, things like that. And I started looking into it. And if you Google,”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I'll tell you what I did, and I'll tell you some mistakes I made too. The reason I want to talk about this is that I want to shine the light on money topics that people don't talk about. And I want people to be informed. You can make your own decision, but I walked in to thinking about getting married with a lot of preconceived notions about what a prenup was, who it was for, and just to give you a sense, like nobody around me ever signed a prenup growing up. It just was not a part of my culture. I started thinking about getting engaged a few years ago. And my girlfriend at the time, we were discussing it and discussing it.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Prenup sets the terms of what you are coming into a marriage with. And it is an acknowledgement that certain people might have certain assets or interests like a business or cash or investments, whatever the case may be. And it also sets the terms for if the marriage ends for whatever reason, what is to be done with those assets, specifically the pre-marital assets. That's what a prenup is about”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I'm an open book, man. I'll tell you anything. All right. This is one of those things that. When I walked into it, I didn't know anything. And I only know I only knew what I had heard on TV, that prenups are bad or there for people who have generational wealth that's been inherited. Like I didn't know anything. And then I discovered when I talked to friends, there was so many people who have thought about this or gone through it, but none of it is online. It's all behind closed doors.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Sweater account that's basically so that brings me to my two things that are variable travel I tend to overspend on travel a bit and clothing and I've set up this system because now I've sort of advanced my financial system where a lot of it is automated I have a meeting once a month I have a personal CFO and we kind of look at it and I basically told him I want my document prepared in this way. I want an executive summary. I want the expenses categorized as such and I only want you to flag the following ones because these are the ones I'm variable on. Like I don't really care if I spend 20 bucks more on deodorant. That doesn't move the needle. But like too much on travel, I got to know about it so I can kind of correct over time.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And those over the long term, over history have returned about eight percent. So if you do the math and you go to one of these calculators like a bank rate or something, you can plug in the numbers and you'll see that your money doubles roughly every, it's the rule of 72. 72 divided by 10. It'll double about every seven years. That's why compounding is so powerful. If you start now and you put even 100 bucks a month in, that number gets very large, very fast. So that's the power of investing. The rest of the money pays my fixed expenses like rent, things like that. And finally, out pops out guilt-free spending. This is my favorite part.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yeah, exactly. Just for tracking purposes. For tracking purposes. And I also think it's nice if you have one big old commingled account. You don't really know what's for what. But what I would encourage everyone to do is think about what do you want to save for between one to five years. And for one year, there are things like Christmas gifts. Like you know that's a known irregular expense or it's a known regular expense. It's coming every December. So if it's 500 bucks, you might as well start saving now. Above and beyond five or so seven years, I just put in the market because I don't need it and it just grows.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Simple, low cost way to invest. And the bulk of my portfolio is either in target date funds or individual index funds. So that money would go in there. I have some money in subsavings accounts. I've got some targets like, you know, I saved up for my wedding before I was before I even met my wife, saved up for an engagement ring. I like to plan ahead. So I have those numbers. Same for a down payment on a house, which eventually I will buy, even though it doesn't make sense for me right now, but I still plan for it. Also vacation. So like midterm goals, you're talking about roughly one to five or so years.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I don't actually know what that is. Okay, so very quickly, everybody thinks investing is about picking stocks and like sitting and looking at this screen that looks like minority report. That's not investing. Investing is very simple, low-cost funds. And these cost you almost nothing these days. We're talking a 0.1% expense ratio. It's very, very low cost. What you do is something like a target date fund is you pick a target date that you're going to retire. So if you're 30 and you're going to presumably retire at 65, that's 35 years from now. So there's a target date fund called Vanguard 2060 Fund. Okay. And what that does is it's like a pie chart. It's pretty aggressive in your 30s because you're young. And as you get older, it gets a little more conservative. Basically what it means for you is that you don't need to do anything except put money into it automatically every month. I love this as a great.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“That's a great question. It can be either. I always like to be more conservative, always. So post-tax is really good if you can do that because you're going to be putting more in, but really for any of these numbers, if it's post or pre, you're generally in a good place anyway. So then that money is getting saved and invested. And investing is like, I try to go more aggressive on investing because we're young. So I put that into things like a target date fund. And I love Vanguard and I recommend them. I don't have any deals with them, but I think they're the best. That's where I put.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Yeah, it's like a process map basically like an email inbox and it gets filtered and shunted where it needs to go. So day to day, my spending is very consistent, except for two areas. Rent is the same. Food is basically the same. Everything is pretty stable. I like to put my target is I start by saying I want to save and invest at least 20 to 30 percent. And I think that's a good healthy number. If you're doing that, the rest of your life is generally in control. 20 to 30 percent. And because we don't have kids right now, my wife and I have been talking about our numbers. We want that number to be towards the higher end.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“That would keep you out of it. So I think for people, whether it's $100, $1,000, $10,000, whether it's, you know, you could even go as big as somebody just gives you a house. What are you going to do with it? I haven't even done that myself, but you could play with the concept. And then remember, if you don't have a system, like for me, the answer is I would put it straight into my system, put it into a checking account, and money would be withdrawn to certain places. 20% would go here, 10% would go there, some money would be spit out for guilt-free spending. And I'd probably go buy a beautiful sweater.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Start with your optimistic self and then try your realistic self. If you say you're going to pay off all your debt, why are you even in debt in the first place? Clearly you didn't have a system.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Okay, you pretty, pretty close. So it turns out that according to these answers that they're all saints, we have a bunch of Mother Teresas in the group. They're like, I would pay off my debt. I would give 10% to charity. I would do this and that. I'm like, you got $25,000 of credit card debt. You're telling me that you would magically take this money and just pay it off. What they were doing was they were having a very optimistic sense of their future selves. I would rather they say I actually don't know what I would do with this money based on my past behavior. I'd probably just spend a lot of it. Or I have no system or way of thinking about what to do with my money. That would have been more honest. Instead, when faced with what we're going to do in the future, we're really optimistic. I'd work out four times a week. I'd pay this off. I'd pay for my parents' retirement. What I would really like to see people is go through this exercise.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“80% of the time, right there, you're going to get it removed. And there's a reason I put that in chapter one of my book, as well as with bank fees, overdrafts, et cetera. It's that most people have never proactively taken control of their money. They just accept the world the way it is. Oh, the credit card screwed me again. No, you can get that back. And once you get that late feedback, you're like, oh my God, I can actually have control over this. These companies work for me. So that's the first thing I would say. The second exercise is a little bigger and it's more conceptual. Right now I'm doing a small coaching program with like 150 people. I'm walking them through my book. And it's like this private group and I'm just walking them through every chapter. And I asked him a thought exercise a couple of days ago. I said, if I gave you 10,000 dollars tomorrow, or if you just found it, no obligation, no strings, what would you do with it? Okay, Tim, what do you think they said they would do with this $10,000?”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And they're going to, by the way, notice my tonality. I'd like to get that waved, please. Why, sir? Well, I made a mistake, but I sent the payment in the next day, and I'd like to confirm that it can be removed and it won't affect my credit.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“If you don't get the book, but if you don't get the book, you can just Google Remit Seti Negotiation Scripts. And you're going to see there, this is how it's going to go. You call up the credit card and you say, hi, I just wanted to confirm that I've been a member for the last four years and they're going to say, yes, I see that. 2,000, whatever year. Okay, great. I noticed that there's a late fee here of $37 from last month. I'd like to get that waved, please.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“If you have any sort of late fee, you should just use the scripts in my book or you can Google for them and you should click.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Order tea, but ask for 10% off, cultivating the muscle used for asking for things is so incredible. And you were talking about those who can't teach and how there are these common sayings that are taken as true. There is one that I like, which I do think is generally true, and that is in life you don't get what you deserve, you get what you negotiate. I agree. And sometimes negotiating is just asking for what you want, right? So are there any exercises that you would suggest or practices, phone calls, questions to people who are listening that might help them kind of stress test some of the things they've accepted? Yes, I love this. So I'm going to give you a small one and I'm going to give you a big one. The small one is”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“It's very valuable to not just do thought exercises, but certain real life exercises. So one could be asking for a kitchen tour. And by the way, don't do it unless you're interested. And if you're not interested, go watch chef's table like Francis Malman or one of those. Get excited about it and have some basic vocabulary so you can appreciate what the hell is being shown to you if you're going to do it. Don't do it just to do it. But that is a question, right? And we know someone who lives here in Austin also, Noah Kagan, who has his coffee challenge, right? So walk into a coffee shop, ask for 10% off, and you can't tell them you're doing an experiment. You can't tell them that so-and-so told you to do it. It doesn't matter what they say. So it could be a Starbucks, it could be an indie. Doesn't matter. And if they're like, what if I bought, what if I don't like coffee? It's like, I don't care. Get a water. Order a pellgrino.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“There are many things that one could take from what you just said. One, I want to underscore. The importance of asking. Think that what I would hope for myself because I'm still Developing my thinking, and priorities will change, and worldviews will change as it relates to money. Money's an interesting thing. We could talk about what the fuck money is to begin with, but that's a separate thing. Part of the reason why I have a $100 trillion note from Zimbabwe framed that I put up on a wall, because it's important to remember just how conceptual a lot of this is. My thinking will change, but to stress test your own assumptions.”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“15 minutes ahead of time, he would love to be able to take it. And if possible, he'd love to post it on Instagram or whatever. Again, not asking for anything free, but like what I've learned is people who are the best love to share it. So there's this phrase, you know, those who can't do teach, that's totally incorrect, never believe that. The very best loves. Those who can't wait, those who can do, those who can't teach. Or they say those who can't do comedy. I got it. Got it. And like, that's a total misnomer. The very best people like, here you are, you're the best in the world at what you do and you love to teach everyone who's the best, whether it's a chef or a tea master. They love it. So I'm going to try to do that when I go to these places. And I'm just like, every one of us can do that. So anyway, that was my exciting experience. So you said that one, oh, that's the one that gave you the idea. Yeah, I didn't execute that yet. And the...”
2019-05-21 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #371: Ramit Sethi — Automating Finances, Negotiating Prenups, Disagreeing with Tim, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT