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Reggie Yates

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128
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2021-07-26
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2021-07-26
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  1. The experience is yours But the experience that people take from the content you will never own. Will never know how much I do affects people or doesn't. There's someone out there right now who's seen everything I've never done and I'll never meet them. Similarly, there's someone who I'll bump into tomorrow who's just seen one film and will have a really important conversation with me. You know, on a lot of levels for both of us potentially I'm not responsible for what happens with what is created once it's out in the world. Being comfortable with that is quite difficult, but also quite freeing in a lot of ways.

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  2. Was able to have a conversation with my dad because of some of the things that were happening on screen. Thank you for giving us that opportunity. Thank you for opening the door. And I felt like an absolute idiot in that moment because I was so busy worrying about being Mr. program maker and making this film that was perfect in my mind's eye. Whereas in reality, The conversation that was being had had never been had before, let alone on the BBC. And as a result, it actively changed lives of people watching. It literally changed the lives of people that messaged me. Wasn't about me. And I felt really embarrassed with myself.

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  3. Out, so we went to the exec's house, and we're in his house, and we're in the kitchen watching it, and the credits roll. And as the credits are rolling, everyone's sort of high-fiving each other, going, yeah, we killed it. We're trending on Twitter. This is brilliant. Everybody loves the film. And I'm just like, that isn't the film that I had in my head. That doesn't speak to the specificity of the experience and the way that I wanted it to. Anyway, point being, I went into my DM. All the social platforms that I was on at the time, and every single mailbox was filled with messages from young men and women saying, We saw that you were making this film, so we purposely watched it with our parents. And I've just come out to my mum because of the film you made.

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  4. The reason I was there was not to have a personal experience. The reason I was there was to make a film that could potentially shed light on an issue or teach something to people across the UK that I would never meet. And ultimately, the world is the film went on Netflix. And I had a similar situation when I made a film about being young black and gay. I have a family member who I'm incredibly close to who is a gay man. his coming out was this incredible moment for me in terms of realizing how difficult his life had been up until that point because of what he worried about because of what he thought might happen and I wanted to make a film about that and cut a long story short ultimately the film for me didn't feel as though it nailed it and I was really really disappointed and the production company that I worked with at the time would always do screenings of the film as they the films as they went

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  5. Before I'd even begun to unearth who he was and what got him to that place. And it was an incredible learning experience when he decided that he didn't want to film with me anymore. And, you know, he's armed guards was sort of like, you know, had their fingers on the trigger as I was trying to force the point that he should keep talking to me and he was just not interested. I came to realize that it's not about me.

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  6. So he recently, I think, has been arrested for that. I'm not entirely sure what's going on with him now. But anyway, at the time when we went to make the documentary with him, he had a congregation of about 10,000 people and he was a multimillionaire, several Rolls-Royces. You name the car, he had it, mansioned the lot. And his entire congregation was made of poor black people. He fell out with me because he didn't think I respected him enough. Because I came to the film as somebody who isn't particularly religious but has a religious background. I grew up in the Pentecostal Christian church. My stepfather was Muslim. I converted to Islam when I was a kid. And in my teens, I decided that faith really wasn't for me in that context. So I'm looking at this man thinking, you are literally exchanging people's faith for their pay packet. And I was disgusted by him and by everything that he represented before I'd even spoken to him.

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  7. That's so tough because there's something in every film Genuinely. And it might even be the lesson that You know, you made a crap documentary and you knew it going in, but you did it anyway. There's been so many amazing lessons. I think the thing that comes to mind most whenever I'm asked this question is. The South African preacher, I made a documentary called The Millionaire Preacher. There was this guy called Umboro who is still active as a preacher. I mean, he recently, I think he got arrested for selling pictures to his followers that he took when he went up to heaven.

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  8. Incredible kid from Morocco, London of Moroccan descent. And he said to me, like in the old time. so naturally funny why haven't i seen you do more comedy and he said mate i only ever get the the child of terrorist the young about to be turned terrorist role i only ever get those parts he said i've never read for comedy ever because i'm always reading for the same thing which is why when this came across my desk i've done everything i can to be good at it because i don't want to just play a terrorist I'm more than that. And for him to be in this film and to be so funny, it's just. The most amazing feeling ever to give somebody that platform.

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  9. That's the movie. It takes place over one day, right? So, you know, we've got like Spoony on the phone or we got like the Heartless crew on the phone and the boys were just sort of learning about garage and they were also forming these relationships. And when we got on set, everyone was like, oh, so you guys have been friends for years, right? And they were like, no, we just, you know, we just hung out. And now we're at the point where we started doing screenings. People have watched it and they're like the chemistry between the boys is unreal. And I say all of this to say that the thing I'm most proud of is that I recognize what is necessary to get the best out of my actors. And as a result, I'm incredibly proud of what they've done. And I'm just really excited for them because I know that they're about to have very exciting careers. One of my actors, Red A's a Moroccan kid, and he's amazing. He turned 21 while we were shooting, or during our break, we got broken up for COVID. We got stopped mid-shoot. And we went back, thankfully, and finished the movie. But red as this young.

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  10. And prior to shooting. The guys allowed me to, I asked them, and they were absolutely fine with it. In fact, they actively encouraged me to bring the boys to the house for the weekend. We spent the weekend by the sea cooking together, watching coming of age movies, talking about the movies very much about friendship and coming of age, but it's also set in 1999 with a whole UK garage backdrop. So the entire music in the movie is UKG. And the boys are desperately trying to drive from North London to South London and the Peugeot 205 to get into twice as nice on New Year's Eve 1999.

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  11. Would it be possible to take one of your homes by the sea so I can go and write there? And they're like, absolutely. And they've given me, they've opened their doors to me for me to go and write at one of their homes. And the desk that I wrote a few drafts of pirates is the desk that Richard wrote Nottinghill on. So I'm rubbing my desk. Come on.

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  12. With pirates, I decided that I wanted to make sure that my three central guys were a little family before we even got on set. So I contacted one of my mentors, Richard Curtis, writing director who wrote Notting Hill, Love Actually, Fallings in the Funeral. He and his wife Emma, Freud, who are amazing, amazing couple. I met through Comic Relief, which is also something that they do. I mean, they're kind of amazing. When I was 18, I met them through comic relief, and they've been in my life ever since. And when I started writing off the back of spending New Year's one of his places, I said, look, could I

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  13. And to take it away is tough. I think the thing that I'm good at. Is people management I'm good with people. I'm good on a one to one basis as well as with the group And I think the thing that I'm best at is understanding my actors because I once was one and knowing that they just want to do a good job and our individuals, some might require talking to before a take, some might require being left alone. Some might require some coaching or some confidence boosting. Some might require being told to rein it in.

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  14. I do. Desperately. Well When you're responsible for the environment, When you pick the people, if it goes left or if you pick the wrong person, it's on you and it's your fault. And that feels shit. When you get it wrong and it affects people that you care about, that feels terrible. So I desperately want everything to work out in an environment where I'm responsible, you know? So I think that that's probably one of the biggest failures that I hopefully will be better at in the next project to be really transparent. Sometimes you have to replace people midway through a shoot. And it's. Knowing when is the right time and also having the balls to say, you don't quite get what we're trying to do. So thank you for what you've done, but your services are no longer required. That's difficult Especially if you empowered them to begin with.

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  15. I think it's easy to say the best, isn't it? The bit I'm great at. Okay, let's start with worst. I think the worst part of my leadership style is I want everybody to have a good time all the time.

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  16. Will decide what this environment is going to be. And the big concern for me was I'm looking at three versions of me. I got on a Moroccan kid, a Ghanaian kid and a West Indian kid who were 18, who were leading their first movie. I remember being 18, desperately trying to get auditions for movies and not getting them. It was a very different landscape then. So I understand the responsibility that I have today to put on for those guys, for Reddit, for Elliot, for Jordan. It's my responsibility to put on for them and create an environment for them in a way that just wouldn't exist if the man at the top of the tree didn't intrinsically understand them. Because nobody understood me coming up. That's where the responsibility comes

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  17. That desire to be me whatever room I'm in has served me well. And that's gone from presenting kids TV right the way through to writing and directing now. Like I've just completed my first feature film, Pirates, which will be out this year. And I'm a producer, I'm a writer, and I'm a director in this movie about three men of color. 18 year olds, right? And I employed the crew. I am sat there in interview rooms, interviewing heads of department deciding who is going to ultimately set the mood for this thing that really matters to me. Because as a writer director, it starts with the script. But as a director, you're on set and you've got 150, 200 people working for you. And if you don't lead in the right way,

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  18. It says something. I'm on the BBC and I'm dressed like the boys that you cross the street from. That was like, I understood even at 18 that that was a thing that meant something. And subsequently, you know, I've had kids come up to me over the years saying I grew up with you on TV and, bro, I loved watching you because we dressed the same, we talked the same, and you were doing that. And it just made me feel like I existed. And when people say things like that to strangers, it's so powerful. I assume that that might be the case, even as a teenager. And I'm so glad that I was right because

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  19. It's really complicated and I think the idea of responsibility comes from understanding that I was one of the first people to be given a platform either on primetime or on children's TV and so on and so forth. And because I've always been myself. Regardless of who I was at that time, and having been on TV for so many years, that version of me has continued to progress, you know, as a teenager presenting kids TV with Kane Row and Air Force Ones and a Mecca Traxia or academic sweatsuit knowing that I'm not just wearing this to my dressing room, I'm wearing this on camera says something.

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  20. But Knowing that when that kid gets a little bit bigger, I can help Sam. Guy who's a mate of mine who I love dearly in maybe the bits that he can't do or the bits that he doesn't want to do. And I offer a different perspective as well.

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  21. So, I could hear you. You know, you go around, you pick up, you change nappy. Sometimes I haven't changed Teddy's nappy just yet because he does massive doo-doo.

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  22. Being a good man is such an important thing for me and my future and knowing that I didn't have quote unquote good men at home. Always been something that I've revisited and tried to unpack and understand. And it's something that's in the front of my mind in a lot of ways, as I said, you know, that so many of my friends are now becoming fathers, seeing how they parent. And also seeing the decisions that they make and now becoming the godfather for the first time, you know, I'm not dad. I'm dad a Jace.

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  23. That I needed help or guidance with. And then there were these other men who helped me with self-discipline or money or even football or even conversations about women and relationships and amalgamated, they made the perfect father. But I had the bits and the bits were enough for me.

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  24. In going to some of the houses of kids that I was going to school with and seeing how their dad's fathered them made me disappointed that I didn't have that at home. But I've spoken about this before and this is a book that I've been working on called Bits of Dad. And I was incredibly fortunate to have bits of dad because of what my mother invested in me. So my mother taught me from quite a young age to recognize what a good man looked like, which helped me pick the right friends and ultimately pick the right mentors and people to follow. So I say bits of dad because I would look up to and ask questions of Mark who worked at the Play Center, at the after school club at my school. And he would help me with sort of dealing with some of the dynamics in my friendships at school. And then I had Billy McQueen, who I call my TV dad, a producer who I met when I was 12 years old at Disney who would answer any professional questions.

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  25. There was a disappointment that I felt, even as a young age, in that I didn't have the perfect dad at home, or at least a dad that I felt that I deserved as a kid. Because I was a good kid, I was working, I was doing well at school, I was kind to my sisters. I thought I was a good kid. And I felt that I deserved a different kind of dad at home, especially someone as someone who was so obsessed with TV, you know, I'm looking at Uncle Phil going, why can't I have what Will and Carlton have? I want an Uncle Phil.

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  26. Especially if you're an outlier. If you are the T1000 People really want to figure out how they can break you. And some people get off on that. And I'm sure you've experienced it. I certainly have, but I don't know, in my experience. A lot of the time when I find that conflict where I find people trying to push buttons It doesn't take much thought to recognize where it's coming from. And most of the time, it's not about you. I mean, books like Ego is the enemy or, you know, Start with Wire. Like, they're really, or leaders eat last. Yeah. The Simon Sinnett book That's a great one for ego. I sort of learned a lot from that about how to lead and also what true leadership can do. And that sort of unnatural thing of not being submissive, but allowing someone to find their answers with your guidance as opposed to you telling them.

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  27. Whatever. Especially if you're someone who has come from nothing and has succeeded. Know it's you against the world for a huge chunk of that earlier stage. It's very easy to need to win everything in life, especially arguments. But most of the time winning an argument actually ends up putting you backwards

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  28. Sometimes allows you to get through the things that are triggering or annoying or make you angry or frustrating and get to the heart of what's actually being said and why. And then when you get to that, it just becomes so much easier because most of the time it's not actually about you. Maybe something you've said or done is triggering to the person that you really care about. You sat across the table from you. And if you're willing to get beyond the fact that they're saying something that in the moment makes you angry, you can actually move forward together in a way that just didn't exist before.

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  29. Yeah, this is going to sound ridiculous, but. Listening is really difficult when you feel as though you're being challenged. And nine times out of ten, any conflict that I've ever had hasn't actually been about me. So to have the resolve to shut the fuck up and listen.

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  30. I'm going to pretend I did. But it's just knowing what your triggers are, knowing yourself at your worst and being comfortable with it. Can proudly say that There's very little that could happen to me now that I don't have something in place to help me navigate it.

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  31. And Kalu is so right, you know. I learned so much in that situation that it weirdly strengthened my relationships with a lot of people from that community and also my knowledge is better. My knowledge of self is better in terms of how I manage myself in complicated moments.

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  32. When someone tells you you're not, it's really difficult to get your head around. But leaning into that, and like I said, getting to know your shadow, understanding why that's such a trigger, understanding what that is setting off for you in terms of things that may have happened in the past, et cetera. It's a process that you kind of have to go through that gets really, really dark and difficult. And then you come out the other side saying, okay, I'm proud of that dent. Like, I'll never forget, actually, and this is a horrible clang name drop. But Daniel Kalua said to me that actually off the bat, he and I had a conversation about this whole situation. And he said, bro, there's a reason that golf balls have dents in them. I was like, what do you mean? He said, well, you know. Golf balls with dents go further. And I was like,

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  33. There's no anger, it's just disappointment because you know better. It feels as though it's the biggest thing that's happening anywhere in the world to anyone. And it really isn't. But the bottom line is that you have caused offense to people that you care about. You have working relationships with people and so on and so forth. And there's a lot of vanity that kicks in, hence me saying what I said about, you know, you feeling that it's the biggest thing because suddenly your entire world is made up of people who are either disappointed or let down or angry with you, and rightly so. And you just have to sit in it. You just have to sit in it and make those difficult phone calls and also be willing to learn and understand that you were wrong. And I think when you are. Your core, a good person, which I believe I am.

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  34. I'm proud of the lessons that came from it. And those lessons, I think, have set me up in such a way that I'm excited about my future because Regardless of everything that I've done, I feel as though I'm only really getting started now. And everything that has happened feels like practice in a way

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  35. In sitting with the community that I offended deeply, which breaks my heart because my first ever mentor Anna Share who gave me my career in television is from that same community as well. And I learned and have learned so much about that community and that faith. And I felt as though I let so many people down. And in having those conversations and understanding that, bro, it's not actually about you. About knowing the power of your platform, understanding that you have a responsibility when you open your mouth because you've worked so long that people listen to you now, bro. Respecting the fact that regardless of what your intention is, if you hurt people, you have to behave accordingly. And that was a huge moment of failure for me that I have learned so much from and that I am...

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  36. Using the language And just some of the things that he's given me have really helped me to understand me at my worst. And one of the big triggers for me is when my character is questioned. I've always struggled with the idea of people getting me wrong or thinking that my intentions aren't pure. And I had a situation a few years ago now where I said something publicly that offended a lot of people. And my argument was, no, no, but I didn't mean that. I didn't mean that. And what I came to realize was your intentions mean nothing if you hurt people.

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  37. I Have done a lot of therapy And I'm really thankful for it. I started in my 20s and now in my late 30s, I understand the importance of getting to know your shadow. And my current therapist who I've been with for a while now is an incredible human being who has given me new tools for the tool belt. I'm using the language now.

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  38. I have no desire to remain relevant. I don't care. I will just continue to follow my passions. And I recognized the power of platform when I was 18, when some random kid's mum stopped me on the street and said, you're a role model for my son and I hated there for it. And then I realized I have no choice in the matter. And the minute I realized that regardless of how I feel, people are going to look at me because I have a platform. I understood the power of that platform. And that started a thinking process that made me desperate to get out of entertainment and get into documentary because I felt as though with that amount of eyeballs, I should have something to say. And that's why I think documentaries have naturally led on to me becoming a writer, director, and filmmaker and using art to actually say something and everything that I do.

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  39. Sometimes it's three months. They do Love Island twice a year now. You don't get to a million followers before there's a new sexier you on the show, you know?

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  40. You get to where you are today, and you see how that has played out. But that's sort of like a bigger arc, but you could go even smaller, you know, in the boy band era. You name them I interviewed them from the Backstreet Boys to five over here to whoever. I met them when they were new and excited. Then I met them when they were arrogant and horrible. And then you meet them when everything isn't happening anymore and they've got that album that no one wants to buy. You see the cycle happen over and over again. Today it's reality TV stars. Only the cycle isn't three albums. If you're lucky, it's three years. If you're lucky, it's three years.

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  41. And so many people want the end result but don't respect or understand the value in the journey. And we live in a microwave era where everything happens overnight and people come up and come down from social media stars to reality TV stars or whatever. And it just, it breaks my heart that nobody's willing to just look back a little bit and see that everything that they're doing has happened before. And it all ends in one way. And without sort of rattling on about it or anything, I had a conversation recently where I realized how fortunate I've been to have been around for so long because I've had a career for over 30 years now. And I've seen the cycle play out over and over and over again. So like being 12 years old and interviewing the Spice Girls and thinking, oh my God, this is the most amazing, exciting thing ever. And then seeing their peak, because, you know, I interviewed them for wannabe. Then you see their peak and then you see the movie and you see them on packets of Walker's Crisps. And then you see the fallout.

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  42. Like the secret, for instance, you know, if you don't have people constantly reminding you of things like some of the messages that are in the secret, you might need to turn to a book that has them all in one place, you know. And I think it's incredibly difficult for people to To be honest with themselves about What they're capable of without willing to do the work

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  43. You know, you're having incredibly important conversations off the back of living a life and doing something and you're still so young. You have earned the right to say this is what I think and feel and I'm willing to share it. And you continue to learn on camera. Making documentaries is a huge part of me learning on camera and learning with my audience. And I'm sure that you can attest to this. There's something incredibly powerful about saying I don't know, but I want to learn. And when you do that and it's documented and recorded, people come along with you, you know? And in this moment, there are so many people that just see the end result that want to be Gary Vee or, you know, want to shout advice and be the tough love guy. And there is merit in that. And I think that, you know, for a lot of young men particularly, you can look at some like, I'll use Gary V as an example. I think he's fantastic in some of the things that he does and the way in which he delivers a message because some people need to hear it. Similarly, on the other side, a book.

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  44. It's really difficult in this era because there are so many experts on social media or on YouTube and who were releasing books or whatever. You know, there's a ton of people who haven't had any life experience, which is why people like you, I think, are so important. And I'm not blowing smoke here.

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  45. Something went off in my head, and I was like, wait, hang on a second, maybe what I've seen in my family and their relationship with work doesn't apply to everyone because these people look like my family and they're having a great time. So what would it be like if I did that for me?

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  46. My mum was excited. You know, she was prepping me on her little cards, like to get my lines down and everything. And I got the job. And then I had this random moment that when I think back, it's crazy for me as a kid to have made this realization I had this realization. And that was on set surrounded by people that looked like me and my family. You know, you had Shirley, who was the matriarch of the family, who actually looked like my grand. You had Norman who played Desmond, who was like the super funny old guy. My granddad was this funny old guy that used to make an appropriate jokes all the time. And all the makeup artists were black. And they would give me little boiled sweets. And everybody was just so fun to be around. I was just surrounded by this blackness, but in a professional setting and everyone was at work and they were having a great time.

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  47. It was about a black family in Peckham who owned a barbershop. And it was a comedy about black life and just about life. And because it was so human, even though it was massively flavored by this Caribbean family, people loved it and it was massive and it ran for, I think, seven seasons, right? So the first audition I go for is Desmond's. And I remember going to Humphrey Bartlett, I think it was the name of the production company in Kentish Town, and we went up to their production office.

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  48. My grandmother worked the buses. She was a cleaner. She did all sorts of stuff. She was a cook for London Underground at one point. Was it London bus? One of the two. My grandfather had two jobs. At night he was a security guard at some random factory in King's Cross. And during the day, he was a mathematics professor at a university. You know, this is an incredibly educated man, but because he wanted to build a home in Ghana and he wanted to look after everyone, he literally worked all the hours that God would send. So whenever anyone spoke about work, they hated it. And then the first job that I ever got as an actor when I was eight years old was Desmond's, which for anyone that has seen it will know retrospectively how important that show was. For those that don't know what it is, Desmond's, I believe it's Channel 4's longest running sitcom. It's not on TV anymore and it hasn't been on for years. But Desmond's...

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  49. It's interesting you said it because you've actually weirdly picked up on a really interesting point because something happened on set in a moment Of realization, even as a child, that only came back into my head, popped back into my head a few years ago, and I recognized how important it was to actually put it in my book. And that was. Work to me based on

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  50. Money started coming in, and you know, suddenly you've got tens of thousands of pounds in your account and you're not even in secondary school yet. And it's like, well, hang on, this is crazy because mum's desperately trying to save to put this on the table or to make that happen. And I'm getting to do something that's fun and it's paying me really well. And I get to do it with Stephen Fry and Hugh Laurie. What?

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