YouSaid · the spoken record

Matt Mochary

lines on the record: 139
first: 2023-03-01
most recent: 2023-03-01
sittings or episodes: 1
sources: podcast

Every line below is reproduced as it was said and linked to the record it came from. Nothing here is summarised or generated. Directory · Search · Corrections

“Hired other coaches who I think are frankly better than I am. So people want the Mashari method applied. We have coaches that they can help them do it. And that's it.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Now that's been super fun, Tim. We're going to post the link to the entire curriculum, which is all free, as you pointed out before. I am completely full in terms of my coaching, but I actually have.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So you just did it now. You'd have to keep that practice going and keep each time this happens thinks. How does this hurt? And really, say it out to yourself, say it out to someone, write it down on a piece of paper, write a poem about it. That's actually insanely effective. I don't know why. And it will prevent you from even going to anger. And it'll make you much more effective. In your relationships. Now, I'm yet to start a new relationship, so I'm not the expert here. And clearly I failed in mine, but I'm hoping that I will be able to test out in a new relationship how not going to anger. Makes it a much more harmonious relationship.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Open up conversation with this person say, Hey, I'd just like to chat and share only here's a boundary that I have. You crossed it. Here's how it impacted me. I don't know if you care or not. But if you do, then I'd love to see you do something different. And what's interesting is, Tim, that when you share your pain and a boundary that got crossed, you're never accusing. You're just saying, this is what's going on with me. And people are actually open to hearing that. But anger is you. And instantly people's brains will shut down and they won't hear a goddamn word you say. So in terms of being effective and influential in changing behavior, Anger is a zero. Expressing your pain and the boundary that got crossed. Is larger than a zero. A chance of being effective”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So, as long as you can keep sitting with that pain, if you focus on the pain, you won't go to anger likely. But you'll notice as you described it, a boundary was crossed, and this is where anger is valuable. Anger points out a red flag, someone just crossed a boundary that I have. And your boundary is making stoicism appear to be not valuable so people don't even try it. and making you appear to be Have bad intent when you know you only have good intent. Those are two boundaries that just got crossed by this article. And if you then can stay feeling your pain, not feeling the anger, and if you want to,”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So here's what I'm hearing. Matt, stoicism literally saved my life. And I wanted to share with others because I figured that I wasn't alone. And you know what? I have shared it. And I've heard from people from many others that it's also massively improved, if not saved their lives. And there are thousands and thousands more that as this expands out will continue to experience this and it will likely save their lives or at least improve their lives. And this article made light of all that. and made it sound like you shouldn't try this, shouldn't even try it. And that's what hurts is that I can see, I can now imagine many people who would benefit from stoicism won't even try it because they've read this article. And that just makes me sad. But then also, it makes it look like I've done this thing that I just did it to help people and it makes me look like I'm a bad person.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I want you to imagine yourself breathing into those areas. So pick one and breathe into that area. So it's just causing you to focus on that physical area and that physical sensation. And I want you to then think of the pain that this experience causes you. And I want you to share with me the thoughts that occur as you focus on that physical sensation and think about the pain and the hurt this unfairness, this injustice, this exposing of you in a way that isn't even true in your mind. How does that hurt? Why does that hurt?”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“So now we experience things at three different levels. We experience things as physical sensations, as emotions, and as thoughts. So when you think about what hurts you about this, because there is pain here that you're experiencing Where in your physical body do you experience a sensation?”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Let's go back. Let's pick a real example. So we can even pick an example. I'll let you pick the example. Where is a place recently that you felt anger?”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Stayed in it, and that was six, seven months ago. And I have purposely not numbed myself in any way, no drugs, no alcohol, no comfort foods even. I've lost 50 pounds in the last six months because I'm eating so cleanly. And the result has been I've And Tim, I have not experienced anger. I don't think in that whole time. So you want the real answer? Allow yourself to feel pain.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And the day after she shared this with me, I'm surrounded by coaches, so I happen to be talking to a coach world class. And he shared with me, he said, Matt, anger is not a base emotion. Anger is a cover for pain because it's so painful that the brain doesn't want to experience it. So it takes it and shoves it outward as anger. But all you're doing is taking your own pain and shoving it on the people around you. So he said, I want you right now to think of what is causing you pain, what about that situation that you got angry about is causing you pain. And just share it with me. So I started to think about it and started sharing. And all of a sudden words came out and all of a sudden tears started to come out. And it was so painful. And I realized, oh my God, I've never felt this before. I've never actually felt pain before until now. And immediately I didn't feel anger. Now it sucked. I hated feeling the pain, but I”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I am also recently out of a relationship, but mine was an 18-year marriage with three children, and it ended because of my anger. And my wife had expressed me many, many times. Zero anger. Matt, zero. You can't act in anger at me at all. And I got to the point where I could mute myself and catch myself or have her catch me and shift out of it quite quickly. But there was a moment of something that happened and I acted in anger and she said, that's it. And for many years, she'd been trying to share with me that it's zero. They can't even start. But I didn't think that was possible. I didn't think that you could not go to anger ever. That seemed unrealistic to me. So I didn't try to find out about that because it seemed like a myth.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Who are around me the most. They're the people who I love the most. They're my co-workers and they're my family. And so what I found was that, and they would tell me, this, my family tells me this too, and I'll catch myself, but there's a moment in there where they may feel too much fear to even mention it to me. They may go into freeze themselves. And then... I've already acted in anger, and then they feel extreme pain. And so, Tim, you've been transparent with me. I'll be transparent with you.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“The shifting out of anger often is just time, just as time goes by, I start to realize, whoa, I don't need to be this angry, two, breathing breath work seems to calm the nervous system. Exercise clearly does. Heat like sauna or anything heating up the core, frankly drinking hot tea heats the core as well. Anything that chemically alters my brain state, simply getting up and going to a different physical space, walking into another room, all these things change my perception of the world. And so having someone outside of me who says, hey, you're in anger, that's fantastic and a good hack. But it's not 100%. And it's not foolproof. And the problem with anger is that the people who experience my anger the most are the people”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Would be one of two things. He would either be a team. I'm shutting this down, or hey, team, I'm no longer doing this. Would one of you like to take over? That would be it.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And that I love. That's how I do it. That's how I not get sucked in again. Although you could argue that I've gotten sucked into the software company”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Just makes it plug and play. Brian Armstrong was the first person to ask me this. And I was like, Brian, you're an engineer and you've got at the time 500 engineers on staff. Now he's probably got two or three thousand. I was like, I'm not an engineer and I don't have any engineers on staff. Why don't you go build it? He's like, no, Matt, I got to stay doing crypto and I can't deviate. And so I was like, well, I'm not doing it. And then Steve Hopman from Reddit asked him the same thing. And then the next person and then the next person. And finally, after about a while ago, this is about two years ago said, okay, I'll do this. But then you're all going to have to participate because I'm not going to go into my pocket to pay developers to build software so that you guys can have it. You guys have to now pay your fair share of the developers. So now people pay and it all goes developers. I don't take a penny because I still want to maintain the I'm not getting any cash out of this because I want to stay pure to what's really joyful.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Exactly. I realized, oh no, I got to stop this entirely. So then I just went with this policy like, no cash, no equity, no investing, no nothing. I am doing this for free. That's it. And what I quickly realized also was that would force me to only interact with people that I love and do things that I love because it would be pure insanity for me to do anything that I didn't love when I was doing it for free. And I did that for many, many years until I knew exactly who I loved and what I loved. And there was no more question about that. Now recently a bunch of the CEOs that I coach have said to me, Matt, within the past two years, three years, Matt, your system is amazing. I'd like to use it with my entire company, but I don't want to have to play your role, Matt. I don't have to teach each person how to do it because it's all in a Google Doc how to teach people. Can you please make software that”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I did was when I first started coaching, in the beginning, I invested. But when I look back over like the first 20 people I coached, I saw, you know, where's there any friction that's occurred here? And I noticed there were two people that was friction, and both of it was around equity. And one was, hey, Matt, you know, he wanted to do another round, and the company frankly wasn't performing. And he said, Matt, you got to lead the round. I was like, oh, no, I don't. He said, but if you don't lead it, then no one else will because they know that.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And so that's what I feel like when I coach, obviously, it's the CEO who's doing this, but I get to in some small way imagine that maybe I actually had some impact”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And it's working, and it's for the local Hawaiians, and it's working incredibly well. But again, there, I'm not running it. I'm coaching the guy who is running it. And that, to me, allows me to feel like I've got my hands in many pieces without actually taking on the burden. And it reminds me of a time I once went to a friend's ranch in South Texas. He brings those up and brings that with shotguns. There's doves that fly overhead and we're supposed to chew the doves or the, I don't even know what they were, birds. I didn't hit a damn thing. And it was getting pretty frustrating. And there was a guy on the other side I could see. He was clearly the best shot. And so what I did was I just walked around the pond and I stood next to that guy. And then when the birds came over, we would both shoot at the same time. The bird would be hit and would go down. It was unclear who actually hit the bird. So in my mind, I could imagine that it might have been me, which of course we all know it wasn't, but then it became much more satisfying.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Feeling like things I did had a slightly wider impact in the world than just my home. And I thought to myself, how can I get the good without the bad, the bad being having to do all the work? I realized, wait a second, if I coach, then I can be in all the conversations, but I don't actually have to do the work. And so that was actually an impetus for me starting coaching. And it turned out to be even better than I thought. I literally get to feel like I'm part of the creation of ChatGPT and I didn't have to do any work. I just coached Sam Alban back in the day at OpenAI. So I think it is sort of having my cake and eating it too. And also allows me to do this effort with training truck drivers. And there's also an effort in Kauai where we've built a vocational school for construction skills. As I mentioned, that's one of the other categories and for free to the students.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“You're right. It was a startup. But remember, I kept it small. I kept it three or four or five guys a year, which I can do very easily through like text and phone calls. And to make it big, I didn't want to take that off. So I hired someone to do it. And then I coach him. And we meet once a month. And I coach him just like I coach anyone else of a big tech startup. I'm not running those startups. And I would say the reason I came back to coaching, frankly, was because I did say I'm not doing any more startups myself. I don't need the money. Like you said, and it's just a lot of work. But I then realized there was some part of it that I actually did miss. I missed the conversations. I miss the strategizing. I miss the...”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“It turns out you still have to eat. And you'll resort to illegitimate activity in order to eat. But if people get a legitimate job, It turns out the problem of eating goes away and they no longer have to resort to criminal activity. They're not like they're committing crimes because they want to, they're committing crimes because they feel they have to. That's it. The organization is called Free World and it's growing quickly. I think it's in dozens of states now and doing well.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And making 60,000 a year now, it's what 14 years later, and he's married three kids. Doing great. I now replicated that. I used to do that with like three, four, five people a year. And it was really fun. I really enjoyed it. And one day, about four or five years ago, a friend of mine came along. He discovered what I was doing. He said, oh my God, Matt, you've got to make this national. I said, no, I don't. He said, yeah, it's your obligation. This is like, this is the most effective thing out there. So I said, I'll tell you what, I'll do it if you do it with me. Like we'll have board meetings every two months and you show up to it. And then I get to hang out with you. So he said, okay. So we hired a guy named Jason Wang, who himself been incarcerated for many years, amazing guy. And he now runs it. And I think this year, he'll probably put a thousand fillins in truck jobs. And they've, of the hundreds that they put there so far that Jason's put there so far, I think the recidivism rate is like 1%. It's insanely low because it turns out that criminality is an economic problem. If you don't have enough money to buy food,”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Going to And doing research, we found that there's basically requires that there be such desperation on the part of the employer that they'll hire anybody who's got the skill. And it turns out there's three categories we found like that. One is construction, the other is truck driving, and the third is farm work. Well, we were in the city, so farm work didn't count. Construction is interesting, but it requires very physical hands-on teaching, so it's not scalable. It's an apprenticeship thing. So it's almost like you get hired by your uncle. And this guy didn't have an uncle in the construction trade. So the last one was truck driving. It turns out truck driving, there's schools out there, and they cost about anywhere between two and four thousand dollars. And the hardest part is passing the written permit exam. But once you do that and get behind the truck is very physical. And this guy is physical, and he was able to learn it. So he sent him to truck driving school. And 60 days later, he had a job as a truck driver.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Anyone. Has ever smiled at me? You didn't have that experience because people were afraid of him. They looked at him and they saw a thug, so they were afraid, and now he had a way of making them not afraid. Anyways, try to get emotional. And so with all that, we sent him out to get a job. And first interview, boom, gets the job. Super happy. Amazing. Again, the people he's competing against. It was like an overnight stock boy at a warehouse or something. They're not dressed like he is, talking like he is, acting like he is. They're kind of like they're not polished and he's acting polished. And so he gets the job two weeks later. He calls me back and says, Matt, I gotta let go. Like, whoa, why? So all the background check came back and they saw my criminal activity. Okay, let's start again. So we did another interview he got and got the next job. Boom, like that. Same thing. Two weeks later, background check came back. They let him go. This happened seven times. Then we realized, you know what? This isn't working. Everyone does a background check. It's always”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Remember, we went to it to practice it. We went to a deli and he ordered a sandwich. And he said, excuse me, can I please have a roast beef sandwich? The guy made it, gave him a sandwich. And my guy I'm working with said, thank you. And afterwards, we went up, ate our lunch, and as we're eating, he said, Matt, and the guy behind the jelly counter was super nice and super friendly. He said, Matt, that's the first time in Manhattan.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“were non-grammatical like, I done did this, I'd be chilling. Can I ask you a question? And I said to him, do you want to speak like me? And he said, yes. I said, okay. So each time he said one of those phrases, I would just write down what he said. Then I'd write down what the grammatically correct phrase is. And it turns out he's a native English speaker, so it's super easy for him to learn it. And within three days, he was speaking like this, like I'm speaking. And frankly, the only guys I've known, African Americans I know that speak like this tone were my two roommates at Yale. So I have this reverse bias that an African-American guy speaks like this, I think he went to an IV League school. And I'm not the only one who thinks that. And so then third thing was act like a nonthug. And I just shared him how to say, excuse me, please and thank you and hold doors open for people and walking down the sidewalk. And when someone's, you know, coming in the same path, just step to the side. So he started doing that.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“But I'm the only person that's reached out to help him. So why the hell would he do anything negative to me? And he didn't. He never did. And it was pretty damn easy to help him because what I realized pretty quickly, and he would come each day and I realized there were three things that made me not want to hire him. One, he looked like a thug. Two, he talked like a thug. And three, he acted like a thug. So I figured if I could get him to look like a not thug, talk like a not thug and act like a not thug. then he would be employable. And so to look like a not thug, we went to, I'm making this a little bit long. I apologize, but I took him to Goodwill and we prefer like 80 bucks. We bought him a complete week's worth of collared shirts and khaki pants and belts and socks and shoes. And he looked like a preppy guy. And then for talking, it turns out there were basically five or six phrases that”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“The floor of a building in Manhattan. Half of it was my residence, half of it was my office. So I had him come there the next time and he showed up. And as soon as he showed up, I realized, oh my God, what have I done? I've just brought in a known killer into 30 feet away from where my wife is. What the hell have I done? But at the end of the first day, He went back out, and not a penny was missing, and I had like hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of equipment. And I felt completely safe with this guy because I realized is there are plenty of people that he can steal from.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Is not going to be fun, but I'm going to try. And so I went to Rikers, and I asked them, there's like a halfway house in Manhattan for folks who've gotten out of Rikers. And I asked them for their hardest case. And they just laughed and they just said, they're all hard. And then so I got assigned a guy. And this guy was a known killer, six foot two prison tattoos, black guy. And I would meet him at the halfway house. But he didn't have a cell phone and he was homeless. And so after I met him one time there, I got there and I didn't know if he was going to show up or not. And I realized, wait a second, I could be here for hours and hours and hours and I'll never know. It's like, that doesn't work. So I said, from now on, you're coming to my place. And I had this.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Rocks, which is arguably one of the worst ghettos in the United States. And I went there and realized there are schools here, but they're so bad. They might as well not exist. So once again, the same dynamic is going on. You want to get a job and eat? You join the drug gang. And as again, the best kids who are joining, not the worst. And I realized, oh my God, is it possible that criminal behavior in the United States is actually rational? Like this is rational behavior to the circumstance that I find myself in. And I thought, whoa, I've got to find out. And the only way I know is to take someone who is already incarcerated, who's getting out of jail or prison, and say, can I, you know, like a little Eliza Doolittle, my fear lady experiment, say, can I have this person get them to get and keep a legitimate job and no longer revert back to that behavior? So I thought, ugh.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“People in Africa, but no one's having violent criminals in the United States. And so I said, it doesn't sound like fun. But if I really want to get my hands dirty and be in a place that other people aren't and help where other people aren't, that's a place to look. So I went there. And also in the making of these two movies, Favela Rising was about the drug war and the slums of Rio. So it put me in the poorest slums, frankly, in South America in Rio de Janeiro. And I realized that There are no schools there. So if you want to eat, you want to get a job. You basically the best job you can get is to join the drug gang. So it wasn't the worst kids that were joining the drug gang. It was the best kids that were joining the drug gang. And then I went, came back to the United States in the second film I made was a movie called The Gloves. It was about amateur heavyweight boxing and the best amateur heavyweights in the world. And they collect in the South Bronx to compete against each other. And so I spent time in the South.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“And it was my job. And it was my job for one, two, three, four, five years. And I'd had so much, I mean, that's my sole focus. I had so much fun. It was just like, all right, enough. And then I thought, well, gosh, what do I do now? And then the only thing I could come up with was, well, I guess do good? I don't know. There are people who do that and they seem to think that that's really satisfying. And then I thought to myself, well, yeah, but if I do good, I don't want to just like write a check to charity. That doesn't feel right. I want to do something that's other people are afraid to do. I want to do the hard stuff. And I don't know why. I had that thought, but I did. And so I thought, well, the thing that people are really afraid of is they're afraid of violent criminals. Because I thought I'm afraid of them too. And my guess is nobody's helping them. And so plenty of people are helping kids with disabilities or poor.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“You name it. Any type of fund you can imagine I've had, and a lot of. Because that was my job, frankly. My first job in life was to make money, and then I did. And then I made enough money that I never had to make money again. And then I thought, okay, well, now I'm just going to go have fun.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“A lot of work, and yes, it was fun, but I'd already had so much fun And I told myself, I'll make another film when my kids want to make a movie and I'll help them make that movie. But for me, it had become more work. And at that point, also in my life, I had had so much fun that I didn't want to have any more fun. It had become kind of empty for me”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Of reverse shadowing. So they shadow you for a while. Eventually, they're going to be like, Tim, I can do that. You don't have to assign them anything. After a while, they're going to get so freaking bored just watching you all day long. They're going to be dying to do stuff. So they'll start taking things off your plate. And then as they do, check out what they do. This is the reverse shadow and give them a little bit of feedback on how it could be done even better until it's being done perfectly. And that's it. So don't skip the reverse shadow spot, but don't worry about assigning them things. They'll assign themselves.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“The best practices, I think, are giving full and total access, saying you are going to spend 12 hours per day with me in person, because in person, just frankly, does work better than remote. And because with remote, you've got a screen share. And then it's just a lot of stuff that's 70% bandwidth, not 100% bandwidth. And another thing is you got to really like this person. So if you're going to spend 12 hours a day in person with them, that's the number one criteria. This does not require extreme experience or competence. This requires you like the person, period. There really isn't much that you need to do in terms of having people making sure they understand because if they see the same information that you see, that's all they need. And if they see the decisions you make in the actions you take, that's all they need. Eventually, when you want to make sure you don't skip the step.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“That's right. It will be zero cost for you. So, therefore, I recommend that you focus on what's good for you, not what's good for the assistant.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“The next is yes, the EA will want your feedback constantly so that she can perform better. But the whole point of this is to make this costless for you, have no cost. And it's no cost. If you don't have to constantly answer questions Yes, it'll take them a little longer to get the information if they observe only.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Regina, yes. She was amazing. But the biggest thing is what I found, the biggest danger is that people take on this role as a stepping stone and they really want to do something bigger. So I've now found actually EAs. Are actually kind of the best people for this role because they will continue on in this role. If you get some, the ex McKinsey consultant who comes in, they'll do it for six months. But within six months, they now want to go run something, something big. And so they tend to want to leave. Whereas the EA will do this for year after year after year after year. And because an EA wants the support. And so I think you've already cracked the first most important piece of advice.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“There's the EA considering, or are you considering? There's a whole list of best practices for the EA, for the chief of staff, which I'll share with you so that you include in the podcast notes and people can read through those. Those are all written by my former chief of staff.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Her actually shadow you physically. I believe that within three months, you would have, and certainly within six months, you would have someone that could do this, that you would trust. Do this for you and make the same decisions you would make.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Spent six months shadowing the CEO and now is performing perfectly as a chief people officer, or you've got this much more experienced chief people officer who comes in and half the time doesn't work out. What's the difference? The difference is the shadowing. This executive from the outside didn't shadow the person who was running people beforehand. And so they were forced to make decisions way before they knew the lay of the land of this new company. So now what we're doing is we're having new executives come in shadowing for 30 days, 60 days the CEO, shadowing the person they're replacing in their head of department role and the success rate have now shot through the roof to also close to 100%. So the shadowing concept is insanely effective. And that's what I would offer to you. You already have an assistant. If you'd be willing.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“People observing in all of my coaching meetings so that they do learn the process and they can implement it with the CEO's reports. I think almost all of my CEOs have what we call a chief of staff, and that may be a bad name because it's too big of a title. This is really a super assistant, not a chief executive, anything. And that's it. And it's worked insanely well, so well, in fact, that many of these chief of staffs have then gone on to run whole departments in these companies. They run people, they run marketing, whatever department is failing. And the success rate of them running departments has been close to 100%. Whereas the success rate of new executives hired to run departments who are much more senior, much more experienced is about 50%. So now what we've done is we said, wait, the only difference is you got this young chief of staff who”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“I have required this of everybody that I coach. And the reason I require it, it's very pragmatic reason, is because I'm teaching a system. And by the third meeting, the CEO has learned whether or not the system makes them perform better in life. And it almost always does. And then they want to use that system with their team. But almost everyone I coach is a founder type, meaning they're not a process person. They love to solve problems, but they don't love to follow checklists. And mine is a checklist. So then they say, this is great. I want to implement my team, but can you please teach someone else to do it? Because I don't want to have to be the one to do this. And I go, No, you should have had that person here from the very beginning. And so now I”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“We should hire more coaches. We should not hire more coaches. That's an example. And when I then said, okay, let's answer the question. What I find out in writing and then both read it, what I find out is that our similarities are actually 98%. Our differences are 2%. But what we always in a conversation, unfortunately, each person focuses on the 2%. And so it looks like we don't agree. Where in reality, we actually do agree mostly, except for this very small thing. But that's a little side note. So, coming back to the assistant, the super assistant.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“Before they really start to make correlations of the information coming in and your decisions going out and they start to make correlations between the two. After about three months, they'll start to say, hey, let me do these low-level tasks and you let them and then you give them feedback on it. And they're never perfect the first time they do them, but they're at 80%. And then they get to 90 and finally 100. And it gets to the point where they can do the tasks as well as you can. And a really good test is you'll write down a question. And both of you write down your answers. And then you copy and paste and then you read each other's answers. And when your answers are almost identical, then you know this person thinks like you. And at that point, they can start doing these actions for you. By the way, this is also a very good technique I found when I have a disagreement with somebody. And we're just not seeing each other. I then do this and I write down the question. We both write down the answer and look at it because what we...”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT
“It's actually quite easy. It turns out that Very effective learning happens in the following way. Watch you do something over and over and over until I think, you know what? I think I could do that. Then I say, Tim, hey, let me try it the next time. Then I do it and you watch me do it and you give me feedback until and I do it over and over with you to give me feedback until I'm doing it just right. And now you have full trust that I actually do it right. And then the third thing is I then teach it to somebody else because in the act of teaching it helps you to clarify what I'm really doing. That is the most effective learning model that I know. And it turns out you can do that with an assistant. You can have someone to sit and simply watch you. Now they're going to need access to your email. They're going to need to sit in on all your meetings. They can be off to the side. I have someone sitting to my side right now for this entire time. And they will simply watch everything that you do. And it usually takes about three months of just watching.”
2023-03-01 · The Tim Ferriss Show · #658: CEO Coach Matt Mochary — Live Coaching with Tim, Why Fear and Anger Give Bad Advice, How to Perform Personal Energy Audits, The Power of Accountability Partners, Delegation Tips, Strategies for Hiring the Right People, and More · IDENTIFIED FROM THE TRANSCRIPT